Why arrest "deadbeat dads" on Mother's Day?

Your statistics show the 1994 data from the
report. The more up to date 2002 data is also
in the same report.

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The 2002 data actually makes the point more forcefully: 39% of dads received full child support in comparison to 45% of moms. (And the awards statistics for all years are essentially unchanged.)

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When the annual news bits about "Deadbeat Dad Roundups for Mother's Day" hit the media this year, I wrote a letter, making the very same points raised above, to each outlet.

There is a war on fathers going on in this country, and this kind of harmful stereotyping is a big part of it. Even in the face of contrary facts and statistics, you see these stories every year. It really is amazing.

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The whole concept of "arrears" is a joke when a judge decides to award an increase retroactive to six or eight months -- or a year. You walk into the courtroom current, and walk out the same day a "deadbeat".

This New York Times article, which came out on Mother's Day (??) takes an interesting look at Fathers 4 Justice.

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FYI, I've updated the article to clarify that the numbers acited are from 1994, and to reference the 2002 numbers to boot.

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Equal means equal. How hard is that to understand? I'm tired of society inhibiting fathers from having fully functioning, natural, loving, dedicated relationships with their children outside of marriage. I'm tired of seeing fathers humiliated this way. Yes, I also want to know if they'll be putting any Mommies in handcuffs on Fathers Day. I'm not condoning it. I'm pointing out the fact that society accepts that it happens to men... and I'm sure we'd see a different response when it's women.

The comment about retroactive arrearages is so true. And let's not forget that judges often impute the father's income. There is no justice in family court. But....

Justice Is Coming!
http://feminist4fathers.blogspot.com/
http://www.fathers-4-justice.us
http://www.sharedparentingworks.org

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The whole concept of "arrears" is a joke when a judge decides to award an increase retroactive to six or eight months -- or a year. You walk into the courtroom current, and walk out the same day a "deadbeat".

This New York Times article, which came out on Mother's Day (??) takes an interesting look at Fathers 4 Justice.

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"I also sense a lingering anti-feminist attitude in this hunt for “deadbeat dads” - a presumption that women are defenseless, and need the support of a man to raise their children in anything less than poverty."

I fail to see how an acknowledgment that child rearing requires the financial support of both parents is anti-feminist. Further, as women statistically make less than men to begin with, it makes sense that women who do not receive child support from the non-custodial parent are in greater danger of slipping under the poverty line.

Case in point: my ex, who has been assessed the lowest possible support payment ($50 per week), owes me more than $41,000 in child support. Do the math - it means that he's basically never paid child support. Yet, he is not prevented from enjoying a relationship with his daughter. While I work (up to four jobs) to pay 100% of her education expenses, 100% of her medical expenses, 100% of her food, shelter, clothing and incidentals, he has moved from state to state, enagaged in chronic under-employment and gone on to have three more children. My daughter and I do not live in luxury. I have been responsible - always working, not having children, not depending on social services. Yet my income over the last ten years has averaged a meager $35,000 and my student loans remain unpaid, dragging my credit further into the abyss day by day. I would say that the efforts of women everywhere to raise their children without the financial support they should be receiving speaks more to feminism than anything else that we could do.

I acknowldge that fathers do get the raw end of the deal in some cases. However, the attitude of the court system has been formed by experiences like mine. If men want to change that attitude, perhaps they should start at the root of the problem. If men took it upon themselves to make sure that all men were resonsible, that all men met their share of the financial burden of raising children, you can bet that the court system would become a much more equitable place. Then we could focus on making sure that everyone, men and women, shares equally in the cost of providing for the children they bring into this world.

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As always the way the hurt a man is through his pockets. What I have read on this panel is men who are angry that they have had to pay child support to meet their child or children's needs. There is no price on love, sickness, late nights with a sick child. There is no price on time. Single mother's have little to no time for themselves or their children. I'm a single mother and a cancer patient and I WORK FULL-TIME, currently planning on finding another job because my daughter's father, who is a very smart business man, has made a business decision on his daughter.

What honor is that in any man treating his child like he/she is a bill? I do agree there are some men who are not being treated unfairly by women or the justice system. However, there is a larger population of men making poor judgement and choices and doing the wrong thing because they want to hurt the mothers.

My child is not hurting for anything because I sacrifice and give of myself. My time on this earth has been shortened more because her father is worthless and does not want to share in sacrificing for his child. I feel sad for any man who feels justified in behaving or thinking the way some of you have on this panel. You reap what you sow. In the end. . . you will have lost something greater than money. When a child sees their mother giving and the father doing absolutely nothing. . .well, when that child grows to be a man or a woman and respectively tells you to kiss their ass, don't get angry or hurt. Sometimes we create madness out of our choices.

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I have been married for about two years and she has a four year old child it seems that the more I do do for my child the more she gets upset ........Is it because I am a good father and she wishes I was the father of her kid ,,Does it get better or should I get out now??????Trust me he rather smoke weed and give other people head for drugs than pay child support,,,should he even be allowed to see his kid his name is tom burlinski

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