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Having it both ways: Being the child-free friends on weekends

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Sarah Gilbert posted earlier today about ways to remain friends with the child-free, and how tricky that can be. It's not that we don't love our child-free friends, or they us, it's just that the paths between the two lives forks considerably. As I was reading her post, I realized that actually, for the past four years, I have had the best of both worlds, because every other weekend, we are the child-free friends. I do not recommend divorce to anyone, especially if you have kids. I think it's only something you should do if you have to, and I did. Having said that, I am not going to sit around crying in my coffee when the kids go to their father's house for the weekend.

Tonight, we are going out to the movies, and tomorrow, we have dinner plans with a child-free friend, and a couple whose child is with the grandparents for the week. It’s funny because we do sort of categorize our friends according to whom has kids. We try to see the ones with kids when we have kids, so the children will go off and occupy themselves, and when we are kid-less, we head out to hear music with our child-free friends. Our friends are really okay with this too. They will call and say, “Are you kid-less this weekend?” and depending on whether or not they have children, they have certain expectations about whether or not we will be free. The nicest thing about striking this kind of a balance is that it allows us to continue to know what life is like without the children’s constant presence, so I have fewer worries about Empty Nest Syndrome than I used to. Who are you friends with? Do you maintain a balance?

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