One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish: Shoot me now

One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue FishOh no. Oh dear. Not that again!
From Dr. Seuss' wicked pen!
No Cat  in the Hat, no Horton, no Who -
Just 63 pages of fish who are blue,
Of Gacks and of Gumps,
Of Yings and of Mikes,
Of creatures so frightening
My son is all like,
"Daddy, please turn it!
"That page creeps me out!"

And please, do pray tell,
What's this story about?
A tale takes two pages
Or four pages tops;
Then another begins,
And from my mouth plops
A gibbering sound,
A stutter of fear
That reading this book
Might take all freaking year.
I cannot skip pages,
I cannot tell a lie:
I must utter each word,
Though I feel I may die.

So the next time they pick this?
Forget it! Pick Sendack,
Where the Wild Things Are -
Take that other book back!
You want red and blue fish?
No way! Fly a kite!
Go bump on the hump
Of a Gump! Now, good NIGHT!


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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.