At home we speak Spanish and French to the children. Even in public I will speak to them in Spanish (my husband in French as I know only une petite plus *sp?*). Occasionally we speak to them in English, but they will learn it in school as a second language, since they will be attending Lycee Rochambeau in D.C. Anyway...we try to incorporate it into our lives as much as we can. It is very difficult, as when my children play with their American friends they speak English and then get caught up in it and speak to us in English, then we cave in and answer them in English. It's a cycle that needs to be broken out of. Difficult but doable. Eventually we will be incorporating German and Dutch (family backgrounds) and I am sure that will be even more difficult.

I think it is a good idea to immerse your boys in the language, and sending them to a Korean school will help with that a lot. Along with the language they will benefit culturally and emotionally, knowing that they are not the only ones whose parents 'force' them to speak another language!

Reply

Originally we toyed with the idea of sending our son to the school that's an International one on a local US army base but since we're not in the US army it would cost a BUNDLE and we just couldn't afford it. We went for Dutch public school. I have no idea if they even HAVE private dutch schools? Anyhow, he hears Dutch from EVERYONE including his daddy except me! Even so he says much more in English but when he used dutch I don't mind. I'm happy for any communication at all. I understand everything anyhow.

We are aware that he's a lot behind the other kids in speech and we had a meeting recently with a speech therapist of some sort provided by the school. He heard our son talk gibberish on the phone to Opa and he did a puzzle with him to see if he could get him to talk. Honestly this whole setup pisses the crap outta me. Just because a child is shy around strangers with talking he's slow? He talks a lot at home!

In the end he said that he sounds American when he babbles. That he's imitating how fast I talk. HAHAA!

ok back to the subject! He says in 3 months we'll see him again and see how far he's come and then if he's really not making much progress by age 4 (he's not even 3 yet) that we should consider eliminating dutch at home which means that his daddy will have to speak english to him as it MAY BE that 2 languages in the same HOME could be what is confusing him. I really don't think it'll come to that but no matter what, they can't decide how I raise my son.

I like your idea though and I will try and remember it if we get to that point! If I could put him in a dutch school part of the week and an english one part of the week I would, but I can't.

Reply

My husband speaks spanish and english, I only speak english. I begged my usband to speak to the kids in spanish, and I of course would only speak to them in english. He wouldn't do it so my kids only speak and understand english.

I think part of the reason he didn't want to teach the kids spanish is because when he started Kindergarten he didn't know english. He strugged a LOT during those first couple of years and didn't want his kids to have the same issues.

My sil and her husband (who both grew up speaking only spanish) only spoke to thier girls in spanish at home. They of course had a lot of english in thier lives because of t.v. and those of us that didn't speak spanish. They are now 13 and nine and neither one of them can speak spanish now so it didn't work out for them at all.

My son Jeff (7), has a friend that is half chinese and half vietnamese. He speaks chinese, vietnamese and english. Lucky kid.

Reply

Your post made my day. Both my parents speak German, one by birth and nationality and the other as a first-generation American child of German parents and unfortunatlely, they never stressed learning it to me. Being older and wiser, I realize I missed a great opportunity. Keep it up, your boys will thank you for it later!

Reply

You should not feel guilty at all about having to send
your kids to Korean school instead of teaching them soley yourself. You're doing the right thing! It is such a common occurence for children
of bilingual households to come out learning only the lingua franca of the society in which they live. Just ask a linguist, esp. of 2nd language acquisition!I speak to my daughter in English and sometimes Spanish. Her father speaks to her in English, though I'm constantly harassing him to use Cambodian. I think I'm evidence enough that if you don't consistently use a language with a child,
they may never learn it. I spoke Vietnamese as a small child, but now, I can't even understand it! To this day, I am rather bitter about not being able to speak a language that's such a part of
my heritage. My mother speaks to my daughter in Vietnamese and English. Part of me resents that she even uses Vietnamese and I feel it is a 'waste' to even go that route with her. After all, my mother
failed (notice the bitterness I still have, even as I am supposedly an adult!) to teach me and my sister the language. Besides, my mother is also fluent in Cambodian, so I wish she would use a
language my daughter has more of a chance of learning! She can even use it with her paternal relatives.You and your husband just
have to be determined to use Korean at home exclusively, while their young minds are still easily pliable! I know of plenty of kids where both parents were native Spanish speakers, yet the kid never was truly fluent in the language. Rather, they could understand everything, but could not speak it as adults.Anyway, I commend your efforts to pass on the Korean language to your children. Not
only will it be an asset in the international community, some things (like culture) just cannot be accurately communicated via another tongue. It just gets lost somewhere in translation.

Reply

You should not feel guilty at all about having to send
your kids to Korean school instead of teaching them soley yourself. You're doing the right thing!

It is such a common occurence for children
of bilingual households to come out learning only the lingua franca of the society in which they live. Just ask a linguist, esp. of 2nd language acquisition!

I speak to my daughter in English and sometimes Spanish. Her father speaks to her in English, though I'm constantly harassing him to use Cambodian. I think I'm evidence enough that if you don't consistently use a language with a child, they may never learn it. I spoke Vietnamese as a small child, but now, I can't even understand it! To this day, I am rather bitter about not being able to speak a language that's such a part of my heritage. My mother speaks to my daughter in Vietnamese and English. Part of me resents that she even uses Vietnamese and I feel it is a 'waste' to even go that route with her. After all, my mother
failed (notice the bitterness I still have, even as I am supposedly an adult!) to teach me and my sister the language. Besides, my mother is also fluent in Cambodian, so I wish she would use a language my daughter has more of a chance of learning! She can even use it with her paternal relatives.

You and your husband just have to be determined to use Korean at home exclusively, while their young minds are still easily pliable! I know of plenty of kids where both parents were native Spanish speakers, yet the kid never was truly fluent in the language. Rather, they could understand everything, but could not speak it as adults.

Anyway, I commend your efforts to pass on the Korean language to your children. Not only will it be an asset in the international community, some things (like culture) just cannot be accurately communicated via another tongue. It just gets lost somewhere in translation.

Reply

Lucky you! My Icelandic husband and I intend to raise our child bilingual by splitting the Icelandic-only interaction for him and the baby and English-only for me. I *wish* we had the option of a special school or class that could help us!

Reply

Family identity is a curious thing, isn't it? Especially here in the United States, where so many families hail from so many different backgrounds. I am not sure how it is in France but I'm sure Paris has it's share of multiculturalism.

My family on my mom's side has been in the U.S. since the 1600s. My father's side is that way on his father's side but his mother (my paternal grandmother) was German and Austrian. My maiden name is Scottish. I chose to learn German in high school and am fluent in it now.

Growing up, I really wished I had more of an understanding of my ancestry and where my family members came from. One of the only ways I was able to accomplish that was by learning the language of part of my family. I think it's amazing that you'll be able to pass this on to your children. They'll appreciate it when they're older.

Reply

I'm afraid my son won't have many opportunities to know his birth language, one of the languages of Ethiopia. We don't speak it, and I doubt we can find an Amharic or Oromo language school in our community! I think it's great when kids grow up knowing another language--good for you.

Reply

As people have said before: please do not feel guilty for enrolling them into Korean school and not teaching it all by yourself. After all, the boys pick up a bunch of French words every day just from attending their French school, no?

I think it's a great think that they'll be able to go to Korean school from September. There were times when I just hated it when I went to Korean school in the Netherlands (also because it involved getting up early on Saturday morning and only finishing at 1 or 2 in the afternoon, leaving me no time for a more time-consuming hobby), but I did gain many more friends out of it and learned not only about the Korean culture and history from my teacher (the subject was called 'guksa'), but also modern Korean culture from my peers, as they went to Korea more often than I did and brought back cds, dvds, magazines and what have you. I'm sure Sean and Will encounter the same things once they get older. It will definitely broaden their scope about Korea as they'll interact with more Koreans other than their family.

Reply