Woman discouraged from nursing in Fred Meyer store
Categories: Pregnancy & birth, Places to go, Eating & nutrition, Playground bureau
Oregon mother Chris Musser was discouraged from
nursing in her local supermarket so like any mother would do nowadays, she decided to start a blog about it. Musser had just sat down on a bench at the Gateway Fred Meyer to nurse her three-month-old when she was approached by the store director. She says he walked up to her with a "weird look" on his face and said, "Oh, good. You're getting a blanket."
He told me there had been complaints about my nursing, not that he minded, but that some people were offended. I was so stunned I couldn't think of what to say, except to remind him that Oregon law protects a mother's right to nurse in public. I felt absolutely humiliated. His comments left me feeling like I'd been doing something lewd.
Later, when she spoke with a regional manager, "he supported the store manager's claim that I should have been more 'discreet' and that three people had complained." Musser says, "I'm outraged that Fred Meyer's corporate policy supports legitimizing the complaints of those offended by mothers who nurse in public, rather than the legally protected right of mothers who are trying to take care of their children."
So what is she doing about it? Find out after the jump.Musser explains:
As the mother of a 3-year-old and nearly 3-month-old, the last thing I have time for at the moment is organizing a nurse-in to persuade Fred Meyer's management to stop harrassing nursing mamas, but it may come down to that. I have contacted Kroger's, current owner of Freddie's, explaining that I would like them to change their policy, company-wide so that mothers can nurse at their stores without being told to cover up. If I don't hear back from them
in a week or two, I'll start organizing a nurse-in and share my story with the local news.
If you a Fred Meyer customer or would like to get involved, here is what Musser is asking of them. You may want to include these points in your correspondence:
- To make a clear company-wide policy that mothers have a right to breastfeed in their stores without being asked to move, hide, cover up, or leave.
- To train all employees that breastfeeding is different from other behaviors that customers might complain about (such as loud music, offensive language, etc.), and that employees are never to ask a breastfeeding mother to move, hide, cover up, or leave. Instead employees can advise the complaining customer to avert their eyes or move to a different part of the store.
- To make the public aware of this policy.
Darrell Webb, President
GO West 1/Customer Relationship Center
3800 SE 22nd
Portland, OR 97202
Or via the Web:
http://www.fredmeyer.com
Please let Musser know if you write a letter. She'd like to keep a count of how many letters they're getting and also to thank you.
Thanks tipster, Sarah Gilbert!
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 4)
ann adams 4-18-2006 @ 2:51PM
Done with a copy to Ms. Musser. Thanks for the heads up.
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Dawn 4-18-2006 @ 3:14PM
With a dislocated wrist I couldn't write a letter too well, but I did manage to call FM's 800 number (1-888-247-4439). Spoke with a lovely lady who was not to thrilled to hear that a FM manager had done this. She says she has 3 kids and nursed all of them, also. She laughed when I told her this made me want to go to my nearest FM and sit down to nurse my baby! :) She said she was going to make sure someone looked into it and got back to me. We'll see, won't we? Give FM a call, folks, it may be the quickest way to make an impact.
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Linda B 4-18-2006 @ 4:26PM
Thanks for the heads up. I just wrote a letter to FM.
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Neener 4-18-2006 @ 4:38PM
I proudly breastfed my son for 7 months and that included feeding him in restaurants, stores, Sears Portrait Studio, wherever we were when he was hungry. This was necessary for my own sanity since he ate nearly every hour for the first few months and I had errands to run. However, I have a big question concerning this story. For me, this story isn't about her being able to breastfeed her child in public, (which every mom should be able to do) but should a nursing mother feel obligated to make a concession to modesty when feeding her child in a public place? I carried a loose, lightweight blanket with me and got very good at unhooking my nursing bra and latching my son on underneath the blanket. It sounds like from Chris's blog that she regularly nurses without any sort of cover-up and feels that this is her right and that it helps her to promote breastfeeding. Breastfeeding isn't dirty or shameful at all, it's wonderful for babies and I'm glad I was able to do it. But I think it's pretty darn easy to shield your breast and nipple from others while feeding, so why not? Of course all stores should be made aware of state laws protecting a mother's right to feed their children in public, but I think a nursing blanket, sling or cute scarf is a small concession in public. At home you can feed them blanket-free, shirt-free, itchy nursing bra-free, whatever. :)
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Kellie 4-18-2006 @ 4:54PM
Neener,
How awesome that your child allowed you to keep him/her covered up. Not my child. Also, I live in FLorida and I refused to stick him under a blanket, sling, or cute scarf.
It is not hard to nurse a child without your breast hanging out. Why does this always seem to be brought up. I have never seen a woman with her breast exposed in public nursing her child. Are there women out there pulling their shirts up to their chins and having their child latch on? Maybe I had been nursing wrong all along.
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momma2mingbu 4-18-2006 @ 5:09PM
First off, let me say that anything a mom needs to do to make herself comfortable nursing in public is great. If a mom feels that SHE needs to nurse in a sling, with a cover-up or under a blanket, then that's fine.
TO ME, using a blanket is like a neon sign that announces what you are doing. TO ME, it attracts more attention than just unhooking your bra and latching on. It's actually MORE discreet to some women to nurse without the added fuss of covering up with something extra. I think it's pretty darn easy to not show anything WITHOUT having to hide under a blanket. After all, if the child is latched on then they cover everything up anyway! And, if you nurse your children for a long time, they will most likely not put up with a blanket over their head after a certain age.
As long as you're not taking your shirt totally off to nurse, do what makes you and your baby comfortable!
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Kate 4-18-2006 @ 6:07PM
It usually is a good thing to quote Oregon law in these types of letters. If their policies are in violation of Oregon law, then they need to revise their policies.
ORS § 109.001
1999 Ore. ALS 306; 1999 Ore. Laws 306; 1999 Ore. SB 744
A woman may breastfeed her child in a public place.
ORS § 10.050
999 Ore. ALS 1085; 1999 Ore. Laws 1085; 1999 Ore. SB 1304
... (4) a Judge of the Court or Clerk of Court shall excuse a woman from acting as a juror upon the request of the woman if the woman is breastfeeding a child. A request for excuse from jury service under this subsection must be made in writing...
2005 Oregon Laws Chap. 466, SB 618, effective January 1, 2006
SECTION 1. The Legislative Assembly finds that:
(1) Women with infants and toddlers are the fastest growing sector of today's labor force, with at least 50 percent of pregnant women who are employed returning to work by the time their children are three months old.
(2) The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that every child be breast-fed for at least the first 12 months of life and urges that arrangements be made for expressing breast milk if the mother and child are separated.
(3) Women who wish to continue breast-feeding after returning to work have relatively simple needs. These needs include a clean, convenient, private location to express milk at the work site and adequate break time in which to do so. + }
SECTION 2. (1) An employer may provide reasonable unpaid rest periods to accommodate an employee who needs to express milk for her child. The employee shall notify the employer that the employee intends to express milk upon returning to work. The employee shall, if feasible, take the rest periods to express milk at the same time as rest periods that are otherwise provided to the employee. The employer may provide the employee up to 60 minutes in rest periods per eight-hour shift to express milk. If the employer is required by law or contract to provide the employee with paid rest periods, the employer shall treat the rest periods used by the employee for expressing milk as paid rest periods, up to the amount of time the employer is required to provide as paid rest periods. If an employee takes unpaid rest periods, the employer may allow the employee to work before or after her normal shift to make up the amount of time used during the unpaid rest periods. If the employee does not work to make up the amount of time used during the unpaid rest periods, the employer is not required to compensate the employee for that time.
(2)(a) An employer may provide a room or other location, other than a public restroom or toilet stall, in close proximity to the employee's work area for the employee to express milk in private.
(b) The room or other location may include:
(A) The employee's work area if the work area meets the requirements of paragraph (a) of this subsection; or
(B) A child care facility in close proximity to the employee's work location where the employee can express milk in private.
(3) An employer may allow an employee to temporarily change job duties if the employee's regular job duties do not allow her to express milk.
(4) This section applies only to an employer whose employee is expressing milk for a child 18 months of age or younger.
(5) This section applies only to employers who employ 25 or more employees in the State of Oregon for each working day during each of 20 or more calendar workweeks in the year in which the rest periods are to be taken or in the year immediately preceding the year in which the rest periods are to be taken. + }
SECTION 3. { + Section 2 of this 2005 Act applies only to conduct occurring on or after the effective date of this 2005 Act. + }
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Kate 4-18-2006 @ 6:08PM
Oregon has three laws relating to breastfeeding. As of January 1, 2006, Oregon has a new law which makes it optional for employers to permit workers to have breastfeeding breaks. Although this is an "optional" decision of the employer, it also only applies to certain size employers. This law does not give mothers the right to express breastmilk while at work, but it could be used to persuade an employer to do so. Oregon also protects a woman right to breastfeed in public, and provides for excusal for jury duty.
ORS § 109.001
1999 Ore. ALS 306; 1999 Ore. Laws 306; 1999 Ore. SB 744
A woman may breastfeed her child in a public place.
http://www.lalecheleague.org/Law/Bills32.html
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darbunk 4-18-2006 @ 6:11PM
Shame on FM! And shame on those complainers.
What I don't get is why people who are "bothered" by a nursing woman just don't look away. What purpose does it serve to complain about a nursing woman? Do they think they can prevent another unsuspecting customer from catching a glimpse of a woman nursing? They must really think they are doing the public some type of service. Come on, all you have to do is look away, and if it really does bother you and you just can't shake that horrible image of a baby nursing, then go to your shrink and vent to him/her.
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L. 4-18-2006 @ 6:15PM
Is an in-your-face nurse-in protest really the best way to get positive attention for breastfeeding mothers?
The "lactivist" asks on her site, "How can the offended sensibilities of even a dozen customers trump the legitimate needs of a baby?"
If I were a store owner, and made my living by keeping customers happy, and three of those customers complained about something they didn`t like, I would probably have asked the woman to cover up, too.
I was once asked to stop breastfeeding in a store in Los Angeles, even though it was my legal right. I took it as a sign that I was doing something inappropriate that made people uncomfortable. Instead of complaining to the manager, I simply took my baby -- and my business -- elsewhere.
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miss lilywhite 4-18-2006 @ 6:23PM
I am a breastfeeding mama, and I certainly see no problem with breastfeeding in public (I was breastfeeding at a cafe this afternoon while out with friends), BUT a store is not a public place, so is it not true that management can righfully ask you to not do it? I'm not trying to stir things up, but am just wondering about the lagality of it...
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Uly 4-18-2006 @ 7:05PM
A cafe isn't a public place either, Lilywhite - not if it's privately owned. The only public places are those owned by the public - parks, streets, buses, that sort of thing.
Which really would limit where you could breastfeed, wouldn't it?
As for what management can or can not ask a breastfeeding mother to do, you'd have to check the laws of Oregon. I'm too lazy to do so, but I'm sure that it's easy to find online, probably at the La Leche League's site.
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Andi 4-18-2006 @ 7:16PM
What is it about even the hint of a woman's breast that is so offensive to some people?!?!?!!! It is a sad commentary that, in the US at least, bottle feeding is seen as somehow more acceptable.
A friend once responded to an officious twirp who asked her to nurse elsewhere by asking if it would be ok to bottle feed in that location. When he said yes, she pulled a bottle out of her diaper bag that she usually used for water, removed the lid and began to manually express breast milk into the bottle. When he asked her, horrified, what she was doing, she looked at him and smiled and said, "I'm preparing a bottle for my baby."
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Jenn Bo 4-18-2006 @ 7:35PM
I know this is only because of my puritan unbringing, but I do not think there is any harm in expecting a breastfeeding mother from doing her best to "cover up". I understand that there are heat issues and that some babies don't like the blanket, but I think our puritan population expects body parts (e.g., breasts, bums, etc.) to be covered. Some opinions about breastfeeding are challenging the puritan perception of our country. As with all related "exposures", I think they have a tough road agead. Just because a person has preferences that lead to habits that are less modest, does not mean that it is okay for society. Are nursing mothers who don't want to use cover-ups entitled to preferential treatment from folks who want to roam the earth naked? I know many of you will think this is my own personal issue, and you are correct. It is a reflection of my attitude about modesty.
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Uncle Roger 4-18-2006 @ 8:23PM
While stores and businesses are not publicly owned, they are made accessible to the public by their owners. A store owner can not pick and choose who she lets in to her store based on race, religion, blah, blah. By making it available to the public, it becomes a public place for this purpose.
Neener... My wife breastfed both our kids. At first, with the first one, she had this "nursing bib" she bought. Basically, a piece of fabric with ties to go around one's neck. She would put that on and duck her head inside to get the kid to latch on while I held it up (but not too up). Then, of course, the kid would unlatch and we'd do it all over again. Then the kid would decide he was missing something and pull it off. And so on. Eventually, she realized it wasn't worth the trouble. That was that. By the time the second one came around, she would just lift her shirt, get the kid on, and go about her business. Mind you, she breastfed 'em both for 14 months each, so she got pretty good. Still, sometimes (and with some kids), covering up simply isn't an option.
Also, I don't know what journal you were reading, but Chris wrote the opposite: "baring my breasts in public is not something I relish". What she does do is nurse in public rather than scurry home like she was embarassed to be nursing. She adds "attending to my baby's needs is more important to me that maintaining my modesty. So, I do my best to keep myself covered and assume that people will be polite enough not to stare." Does not sound like an exhibitionist to me.
The fact is, breastfeeding is not easy. It's hard work and it's difficult. But, because it is so much better for the kid, the laws are (or should be) designed to make it as easy as possible for women to breastfeed their babies. Don't like seeing boobs? Tough. Look away. You'll be glad that kid is breastfed when he's older, doesn't get as sick as other kids, and thus lowers your healthcare costs and taxes. In the meantime, look away.
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Amy 4-18-2006 @ 9:05PM
If people are so offended by the breast, then we will have to go draw little blankies or cute scarves on all the covers of Cosmo, Star, US, ETC. There's mammary material there galore...and no one complains about that. Maybe it's the "live breast" that freaks them out. They just need to get over it and move on, go look at the roasting chickens...whoops, breasts there too. Exercise your rights and don't back down.
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L. 4-18-2006 @ 9:37PM
I don`t know -- I heard PLENTY of complaining about Janet Jackson`s nipple!
We`ve got a strange double standard going: breasts are okay, nipples are not (or, as in breastfeeding, even the threat of the mere flash of a nipple before the baby latches on).
I personally don`t like the site of a woman breastfeeding, because it reminds me of the worst years of my life. But I would never tell anyone to cover up -- I just look away.
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nonlineargirl 4-18-2006 @ 10:03PM
My letter is waiting to be mailed.
On Kate's note about the Oregon law on pumping - sadly, the law is crap. It only says that an employer MAY provide breaks for an employee to pump. The original bill was that employers "MUST" do this, but for some reason that was too shocking and the language was watered down to this meaningless drivel. Pissed me off, because I was pregnant when the bill was offered, amended and passed. I hoped for so much more.
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Deborah 4-18-2006 @ 10:09PM
I still have a vivid childhood memory of walking into a restaurant waiting area, and seeing a woman breastfeeding. I couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 at the time, but I still remember thinking, "why couldn't she go somewhere more discreet?" Breastfeeding may be natural, but so is taking a pee. (But I'm not going to squat in the supermarket parking lot and go if I feel like it.) All we're asking for is some common courtesy--if you must, cover-up!
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Uly 4-18-2006 @ 10:23PM
Oh, Deborah! You're right! Feeding your child is *exactly* like urinating! I've been completely converted by your clever argument! Verily, I've never heard *that* one before!
*looks at bottle of water next to her*
Gee. All this sarcasm must be going to my head. I've now completely lost the ability to distinguish between things I eat and other, less sanitary liquids. Is it water... or is it pee? Dare I drink it?
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