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Your best potty-training tip. NOW.
Filed under: Development/Milestones: Babies
Sorry if I seem a bit snipey today -- but really, I've HAD it with the potty training thing. I'm sick of puddles and pull-ups, man, just sick of it. But most of all, I'm sick of being nice about it. All the books say you shouldn't apply any pressure on your child -- that it should be fun! The Toilet is Our Friend! So far, I've been great -- celebrating all her potty successes, and giving a small sad "uh-oh," when she's had an accident, followed by a "No biggie -- we'll just clean it up," with a smile, and a reminder: "Remember, Alex? We peepee in the POTTY." And she smiles and says "potty" together with me and it's just a laugh a minute.Thing is? What I really want to do is yell, "GIRLIE, ONE MORE PUDDLE AND I SWEAR YOU'LL STAY IN THE NAUGHTY CORNER UNTIL YOU'R E15!!!"
*ahem*
Anyway, my patience is really wearing thin. Anyone have any tried-and-true tricks for getting your kid to consistently go to the potty? I'm not talking through naps and bedtimes -- I just would like a consistent, "I have to go to the potty" while she's awake. She does it occasionally, but I want it every time.
EVERY. TIME.











ReaderComments (Page 2 of 2)
5-08-2006 @ 5:36PM
Lisa said...I'm the mom of 6 kids (4 girls and 2 boys) ranging in age from5-19 (yes, they are all mine and my husbands together:))-although this doesn't make me an "expert" by any means, I have been there and done that a few times (I have also been an in home Day Care Provider for 19 years). My girls definately trained easier than the boys and were all trained by the time they were 2-1/2, the boys were each a little over three. This was only during the day-most were trained at night too, but there were a couple who were 6+ before they were dry at night. The best thing to do in my experience is to wait until they're ready, otherwise who is getting trained? YOU or THEM??? I wouldn't use pull ups either-get the heavy training pants from WalMart or wherever and be prepared for accidents. It usually only takes a couple of weeks for them to get it. I use M&M's for pee success and a sucker for #2. If they're successful at Day Care and not at home then they're pretty much pulling your chains! Sorry!! One other tidbit I read once is to not even try until they are at least 27 months old as they just aren't ready & it takes some of the pressure off of you as well. Another comment off the subject a bit is 3 is awful young for preschool anyway-they have ALOT of years of structure and responsiblity ahead of them, but when will they EVER get to be a baby again(and they are still baby's at 3)?? Here's hoping.....:)
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5-08-2006 @ 5:44PM
Ms Sisyphus said...When mom is more invested in the potty than the tot, it ain't gonna happen. Kids this age have power over so little in their lives; the second they realize they have power over you in this, you lose.
I also firmly believe that if potty training is a challenge, it's not the right time.
Diva Girl was trained inside of a week. It was really quite simple: She wanted panties. Desperately. So I explained the steps she needed to take to get them: She had to keep her diaper clean and dry. a week later, we bought several packs of cartoon festooned underpants that made her princessy little heart sing. And a pack of the plainest, uglies panties I could find. I told her that so long as she took care of her new panties, she could cover her rear in pink frilly princesses. But if she wrecked a pair by peeing or pooping in them, I'd replace them with the ugly panties. Which are still in the package.
We have the potty out for Zen Baby (in the livingroom, because it may not be pretty, but it damn sure is practical), and she uses it a few times a day. I suppose if I really tried I could have her trained soon, but I've been sort of half-assed about it. Frankly, a newly potty trained kid? Not all that convienent.
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5-08-2006 @ 6:09PM
Amie said...For our 2 1/2 year old nephew (who I was raising at the time), we did not use pull-ups during the day at all. We switched to underwear cold turkey, on the day care's recommendation. They also requested 10 changes of clothing for this time. So we bought 15 pairs of boxer briefs (the better to prevent leaks, they were more snug in the leg), 15 pairs of cheap Wal-Mart sweatpants, and 15 extra socks, and extra shoes. Yes, trust me, you DO need the footwear with this method.
They (and we) would ask him periodically if he needed to go and reward him with stickers if he did. It still took a few weeks for him to really start to get it. And months of carrying extra clothes eveywhere. SO, I ended up doing really yucky laundry every single night after work. He was three before I would say he was really daytime potty-trained. He is five now and just stopped wearing Pull-ups at night.
BTW, the first time he told me BEFOREHAND that he had to go, we had just left Target and were putting the bags in the car. We rushed back in and he made it! His older brother and I were standing with him in the handicapped stall cheering and clapping like fools. I'm sure everyone else thought we were nuts. Then I took him back to the register and let him choose whatever candy he wanted (he didn't get much candy). Two and a half years later, I still smile at this memory.
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5-08-2006 @ 8:02PM
denise said...BE PATIENT! Wait till the child is ready. Which means the child shows interest and can know the difference. Anyone anymore wants to RUSH them out of the diaper, because the parent is ready. It does cost a lot, yes. Time consuming, yes. Lay off and give them a break!! Then use your imagination when the time is right, for the your child. Then it probably will be fun to learn.
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5-08-2006 @ 10:20PM
LS said...Thank you, everyone for the tips. I have employed some, and some I will save for future. This whole page is getting printed out and LAMINATED!!
One thing I do have to offer... I got "Piddlers" as a gag shower gift, and now I think they'll come in handy. I am a little nervous about using Fruit Loops or Cheerios in the toilet (with *my* luck, he'll want to aim at them OUTSIDE the potty...), so I'll use those Piddlers. I saw them at Babies R Us, but here's a link, too: http://www.pottytrainingconcepts.com/Toilet-Targets-PD-z.html.
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5-08-2006 @ 10:33PM
Corrie said...I just kept pestering my kids, "Do you have to go to the potty? Do you need to use the potty?" Now, if I could just get my three year old to aim, we'd be in business.
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5-08-2006 @ 10:56PM
MamaChristy said...I read about a rapid approach - though I haven't tried it and don't know anyone who has - and there is an entire book about it. "Toilet Training in Less Than A Day" by Nathan Azrin (available on Amazon) might be something to look into if you get to July and haven't been successful. Give the little chick-a-dee a little more time...
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5-08-2006 @ 11:53PM
Michelle said...I gotta tell you, I cheated. I was a preschool teacher before my second child was born and spent quite some time in the "potty training room". I thought I would just do what I did there: We went before and after every activity, we had a fancy activity chart, a special potty dance, we called Daddy at work, we had potty books and games we played on the potty.
But with a preemie at home demanding so much of my time and attention, I just didn't have it to put into potty training my daughter. I wasn't consistent.
One day she went to Grandma's and Grandma kidnapped her. 5 days later, she came home, completely potty trained, day and night. BTW, I'm hopping Grandma is willing to kidnap my son when it's time to potty train him.
Now I just have to deal with the fact that my daughter want to go potty 3 times in every store or library or any other public place we are and it takes me FOREVER to get my errands run!
BTW, Grandma says she put the potty in the living room where Gabi played and watched her movies, that way she didn't feel like she was missing out on anything. That is the biggest obstacle with MY 3 yr old is she is afraid she is going to miss the party.
Consistancy is key. Good luck!
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5-08-2006 @ 11:59PM
Diana Keller said...Go ahead...bribe her. My daughter LOVED money, stickers were okay, but money...ooh boy! So we gave her a dime everytime she was successful. I kept a roll of dimes at her preschool to use too. When she kept dry most of the time she got to go to the store and buy her own panties. I had finally found the trick for her. My son was so easy, I felt spoiled.
My third child just doesn't get it. He looks down and says,in his most serious voice, "come out pee pee". Unfortunately it doesn't seem to work that way. (But it sure makes my day. Hee Hee)
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5-09-2006 @ 7:55AM
Lois Cole said...My granddaughter is pretty well trained in the day but not at night. We have stopped using diapers at night so that if she wets she will know it. But it is not working because she sleeps right through it. She is 3 and a half. Last night she woke up for the first time after she had wet. I am tired of changing sheets. Any suggestions?
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5-09-2006 @ 10:06AM
elsimom said...Probably nothing new here - it's the same old sticker idea - BUT - we put the stickers on a chart, proudly displayed (and pointed out to any visitor!). We used the pullups, because with a newborn, I just WASN'T going to deal with the mess. Our best story was when she was staying dry at night - we told her that when the last pullup was gone, she could wear her underpants to bed. The day after she wore the last pull-up, I told her we were all set - she could wear her underpants to bed.
Wouldn't you know it - she had a little song - which she sang, loud and proud, all through the Target store that morning, "I can wear my underpants to bed! I . . can ... WEAR my underpants to BED" and so on. Many were the fellow moms who nearly steered the carts into walls laughing.
Hang in there Karen, just when you're about to give up, they decide they're ready, and then you look back 3 weeks later, and wonder why it seemed so hard at the time.
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5-09-2006 @ 3:02PM
Kate said...We used bribery. Go in the potty, get a jelly bean. (Sugar-free Jelly Bellies!) I was a little worried that we'd be rewarding her for using the toilet until she turned 18, but she mostly forgot about the jelly beans after about 2-3 weeks. On the rare occasion that she asks for one now we just tell her that she has to stay dry all day and she seems satisfied with that. We also started out with the potty in the living room (where we spend most of the day) so that getting there in time wouldn't be an issue, and we didn't go out of the house much for the first week or so. We used cloth training pants and only introduced pull-ups after she was pretty good at using the potty. She wears pull-ups for naps and at school. The one thing that hasn't clicked for us yet, however, is getting her to poop in the potty. There is apparently nothing in the world that she wants bad enough to make her want to poop anywhere but a diaper. Tis a mystery.
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5-09-2006 @ 5:04PM
Kimberly Koski said...Please disregard my accidental reposting! I screwed up - sorry!
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5-09-2006 @ 5:14PM
Kimberly Koski said...Kate - I'm still monitoring this board looking for any ideas and I read yours. My son did the same thing and here's what our doctor said. (I'm not kidding - I couldn't make this up) He said that some children see the poop as truly a part of their body, an extension, and it freaks them out to flush a part of them away. Like taking her hand and flushing it down. I swear this is what he told us! No worries though, my son got over it and your sweetie will too. Take heart!
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5-09-2006 @ 6:14PM
Michelle said...We did the money thing too. She got a penny each time. When she had 10 pennies, she put them in her piggy bank and got to pick out a cheap little trinket from the "goody bag". That worked when I had the energy to be consistant with it. We had to let Grandma do it. Grandma had no one else to concentrate on (no therapy sessions and doctors appointments with the baby, etc.) and she just stayed home with Gabi for 5 days. Gabi wore REAL underwear for those five days (those padded training pants didn't work for us)and, like I said, kept the potty chair in the living room, where they played. There has been no looking back!
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5-10-2006 @ 3:34PM
Camille said...Aww, hang in there, it sounds like she is doing pretty good, leaps and bounds ahead of my 2 year-old son. I have dappled a bit in potty training him but he just isn't interested yet.
My daughter was so easy to train because she wanted to wear big girl underwear, my son couldn't care less about them, he wants his diaper.
If it gets too stressful for either of you, it's ok to step back from it then give it another week or two and try again.
Potty training is a lot of work for parents and I have been dreading it for a long time. I don't have any real tips other than ditch the pull ups for thick, padded underwear with a nylon pull on cover. My daughter trained quickly after we quit using pull ups.
Good luck!
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5-11-2006 @ 10:44AM
Jodi said...Both my kids were out of diapers by their 2nd birthday. I have both a boy and a girl.
I made up a sticker chart and hang it to the bathroom door and when they would use the toilet they were allowed to put stickers on their chart. I would also take them into the bathroom every hour or so and sit their butts on the pot.
They also had blues clues toilet seat and their own kandoo step stool. Cottonelle makes kids toilet paper with puppies on it. Its great for kids who use 20 sheets of paper at a time.
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