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Mothers of the heart, we salute you
Filed under: Just For Moms, Adoption, Medical Conditions
Tomorrow is Birthmother's Day. Did you know that? If you are adopted, what do you do to celebrate it? If you are a birthmother? As Mother's Day approaches, I am feeling rather self-conscious about all of the attention and horn-tooting being devoted to mothers. Because I know this day must be filled with pain for many many women: Those who have lost children. Those who have miscarried. Those who are trying to conceive. Those who have placed children for adoption. Motherhood is so charged-- the current media is filled with stories about women who are castigating each other about Motherhood issues: Stay home or work outside the home? Spank or not? Breastfeed or bottle? How many children should you have?
Well, we are insensitively cutting the hearts out of those women who would give anything to trade places with us, if only to have a child. If only to hold a child of their own in their arms.
You *are* mothers. You are mothers to the babies of your hearts. You are mothers to the babies you have lost. You are mothers to the babies you are trying to have. You are mothers in your souls. Your quiet anguish does not go unnoticed.
As Mother's Day approaches, please know that we honor you. We support you. We salute you.
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
5-12-2006 @ 1:04PM
Jenna said...Very simply put, thank you.
Reply
5-12-2006 @ 1:19PM
Jenna said...PS - I just posted about this on my own blog. Again, thank you for writing this. Thank you for acknowledging firstparents on a day that not many know about in such a widely read forum.
Reply
5-12-2006 @ 1:57PM
Bluepaintred said...nice nice nice post, very touching... may ipost this on MY blog with a link here of course?
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5-12-2006 @ 3:03PM
Tammi said...Thank you for the acknowledgement, it is appreciated.
Reply
5-13-2006 @ 4:47AM
kimkim said...I don't support Birthmother's Day. What does that have to do with mother's of the heart anyway? They don't have Adoptive Mother's Day so why do they have Birthmother's Day. I prefer that we all celebrate Motherhood on Mother's Day. Adoptive, Natural, Foster - all mothers are equal.
I don't agree that if you wish to be a mother that makes you one. I don't mean this is an unkind way, It's kind of like calling potential adopters parents before they are or calling a couple who want to adopt a "waiting family" I think it's coercive. It's the same as calling a pregnant woman a birthmother before she has gone through with the adoption.
So you are not a mother if you don't have children. I'd like to be an oscar winner but I'm not an Oscar winner in my heart and therefore an Oscar winner.
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5-13-2006 @ 10:03PM
CHERYL said...You don't support bithmothers day? I never heard of it before now, I am a birthmother, and a mother. My heart will always ache for the daughter I gave up for adoption. Adoptive mothers are rewarded everyday of their lives,with a child. A child who was loved!, a child who will be thought about EVERYDAY, every minute of everyday., acknowldge these woman,acknowldge me. We,for no other reason than love, gave a part of our soul.So relax,and let people feel better.
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5-14-2006 @ 4:29PM
Mary said...That was a nice acknowledgement. Most of us feel that our quiet pain DOES go unnoticed. The heartbreak of wanting a child and not having one (for whatever reason) is unbearable. Mother's Day is just another reminder.
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5-14-2006 @ 4:34PM
Mary said...Comforting sentiment. Most of us do feel our quiet anguish goes unnoticed. The pain of wanting a child and not having one (for whatever reason) is unbearable. Mother's Day is just another reminder.
Reply
5-15-2006 @ 5:18PM
Poor_Statue said...Just another thank you. You said it beautifully.
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