Is your partner doing enough?

Filed under: Just For Moms, Just For Dads, Work Life, Activities: Babies, Childcare, Sex

Once children enter a household, things change. How could they not? Before the "blessed event," there were two people involved in the day-to-day household business. If you dirtied a plate, you washed it. If your clothes needed cleaning, well, you knew how to do that as well.

Once a child enters the picture, things change. Babies need diaper changes. Older kids need help with homework, packed lunches and trips to wherever the kids go these days. Besides all the extra that comes along with kids, there's still the household duties that must get done.

It is easy, after a week of changing dirty diapers and washing clothes to think "come on, I know you can load the dishwasher." I think, in general, the household duties in my house are divided pretty evenly. My husband and I both change dirty diapers, both brush toddler teeth and give the children baths.

He is the person that takes out the trash (something that I hate doing) and I am the person that sweeps the wood floors, something he hates to do. There are moments when I wished he'd take the initiative and get our children dressed when we are getting ready to go out, just like he probably thinks that I should learn to actually find the lost sippy cups and put dirty dishes in the sink.

That being said, I found this article about what to do if a partner isn't doing enough quite interesting. Sure, it says "Dad," but I find that sexist as there are many great Dads who do their fair share of child-rearing. I enjoyed the parts about asking what your partner finds as your roles in the family in addition to giving your partner the space to actually get things done around the house and with the children.

But first, don't forget the first rule: You should actually ask for help, if you feel you need it. Assuming won't get you anywhere.

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.