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40% of U.S. children are born out of wedlock, is yours one of them?
Filed under: Your Pregnancy, Divorce & Custody
This is an article that soothed my somewhat scandalous soul: nearly half of all U.S. babies are illegitimate. It is not the unwed teen aged mothers who are driving up the statistics, but the over all acceptance to children born out of wedlock. I know that many people might not agree with this trend, but I happen to be okay with it. When I first got pregnant with my oldest son nearly 14 years ago, the pressure to marry was enormous. We were both still in college with no plans at all to marry. But to please our families we did marry and tried to make the best of it. We divorced after nearly 10 years. But the divorce didn't quite stick and I ended up again pregnant. This time we dispensed with social pressures and simply moved in with each other yet again. Unfortunately, the unhealthy patterns did stick and we are now done. Three children: the first legitimate by just 6 weeks, the second free and clear, the third one born shamelessly out of wedlock. It makes no difference to me when or how they were born. I love them all.
It seems that I am not the only one to feel comfortable with this situation, 4 out of every 10 mothers out there are of the similar thinking. What about you? Are you in that 40%?
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
11-22-2006 @ 8:10PM
Ginny said...Naw, we were married 5 yrs before our first was born.
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11-22-2006 @ 6:19PM
John said...thanks for this information
Reply
11-22-2006 @ 7:59PM
Jessie said...Im part of the 40% :) And 50% of my 4 children were born out of wedlock :) ::sigh:: Im ok with it...
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11-22-2006 @ 9:03PM
Michelle said...We were planning the big wedding ceremony for June 2002. In October 01, when deposits started being due, hubby decided it would be ok to elope, like I originally suggested. (1st wedding for him, 2nd for me) So in November 01, we grabbed our best friends and my our parents and drove to Gatlinburg and got married. 6 weeks later we conceived our 1st child. I know people were counting back the days, since we had abruptly moved up our wedding date. I would have been ok with having our baby before the wedding, if that was the way it was intended to be for us, especially since having been through fertility treatments in my first marriage and fearing I was never meant to be a mother! BTW, 15 mos after our daughter was born, we conceived our son, so apparently it wasn't me, or maybe I had just chosen the wrong father the first time around!
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11-22-2006 @ 9:31PM
gloria said...I'm going on my third child. My children are all from the same father and all three of them are out of wedlock. But i'm fine with it. I don't think it's such a big deal.
Reply
11-22-2006 @ 10:17PM
Stacy B said...We're part of the 40%...but I've been with my boyfriend for 8 and a half years & we have a 4-year-old daughter, so technically it feels like we're married! We will get married, eventually, but we're not sure when or how yet : )
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11-22-2006 @ 11:32PM
R Biernesser said...I was married before I had my child, but I had family members adding the weeks because I was two weeks early and they thought I married for that reason. I know that I wasn't pregnant when I married b/c I was on my period during the honeymoon (some honeymoon, huh)
After watching a lot of friends make this mistake, including my brother, the one advice i have....Do not get married just b/c you are pregnant.
Personally, I didn't have to have a child before I was married, but to those who do, it's their busines..
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11-23-2006 @ 12:37AM
IvyMae said...We were part of that 40%, and it never really phased us. Marriage and commitment are two different things, and it's great if you have both, but if I had to choose one, it would be commitment. We are commited, own property together, wear rings and call each other husband and wife. Does the state really get to say whether or not we are a family? I don't think so.
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