Nap time secrets
Categories: Just for moms, Toddlers, Money & work, Development
Nolan has never been much of a sleeper, and though I'd love to moan about that endlessly, I've lucked out in so many other facets (eating, temperament) that I just usually nod mutely when other Moms discuss their babies naps.I was eavesdropping on a conversation of a few Moms at daycare last week, one Mom asking the other whether her daughter had moved from two naps to one.
"Not yet," replied Mom number one,"She usually naps for an hour in the morning and for two in the afternoon."
"Well, Reese only has one three-hour nap in the afternoon, so I can get a lot done," responded Mom two.
And I stuck Nolan's noodle arms into his jacket while he was distracted by Mighty Machines and I wondered, am I the only Mom in the Universe whose child never has a pattern to his nap time? At day care, Nolan naps pretty steadily - two hours in the afternoon. But when he is home with me, he sometimes naps for twenty minutes, and sometimes for three hours. There is never a rhyme nor reason so I can't plan my day. Sometimes he naps twice, sometimes once, and two days in a row are never the same.
I wonder, do other Moms have inconsistent nappers? Or have I not laid the proper foundation by allowing Nolan to tell me when he's tired? Who knew sleeping could be so complex?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Lea 12-04-2006 @ 10:05AM
Please don't blame yourself! Like you, I'm learning all these secrets for the first time, but I'm convinced some kids just don't, or won't, follow a pattern with sleep. Most of Baby A's little friends still take chunky afternoon naps at 2.5 years. One little friend in particular sleeps from 12:30 to 4 every afternoon, and 9 PM to 7 AM every night. My girl, to put it mildly, does not.
I have followed a regular daily rhythm--play, lunch, attempt at sleep around the same times each day. No dice. (We've always had a consistent nighttime routine, too.) She goes to nursery school four mornings a week. I take her to the park and make her run and play for long periods, but to avail sleep-wise. She naps only several days a week, and then for short times and with no pattern.
At the advice of her pediatrician, I try not to stress about it. He told me just to let it go, that the arguments and fights over naptimes weren't worth it. Life has been easier, and if she conks out in the baby-jogger at 4, then we make bedtime a little later. No big deal. She is happy, full of energy, and usually meltdown-free.
I am, however, very jealous of the friends who get that three-hour break every afternoon. It must be nice!
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Carrie 12-04-2006 @ 12:04PM
I have the same kid! She is usually a twice a day napper but the time and amount she naps can go anywhere from 2-4 hours a day. Each day is a new surprise.
It was always hard on mat leave b/c I never knew how much free time I would have.
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JustMe 12-04-2006 @ 1:09PM
My 16 month old is a crummy sleeper, most of the time, too. Lately she's on an every-other-day schedule - she'll take two naps on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and one on Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, then she'll flip it the next week. But that's only sometimes. She throws in an extra short nap sometimes on the one nap days, or will skip one on a two nap day, just to keep me on my toes.
Even when she was a newborn, she would only sleep 9 or 10 hours in a 24 hour period. I even showed her in the book where it said that new babies sleep 14 - 16 hours, and she just looked at me like I was stupid.
But there is HOPE! Last night she slept from 9 pm until 8:30 am in her own bed without waking! WOW!!! She's only slept through the night a handful of times, so I was one happy Mommy. And there is a chance that I won't be going with her to college so that I can nurse her to sleep several times a night when she's 18. :)
My friend has a kid the same age who only eats cheese and bananas and Ritz Bitz. She has tried everything, but he rejects anything that's not one of the above. Just like that isn't her fault, our kids' crummy sleeping isn't our fault. I think all kids come with a set amount of pain-in-the-butt, and they all spread it out differently over their 18 years. My friend's kid is a good sleeper. Go figure.
They can't be good at everything all the time, after all.
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roxanne 12-04-2006 @ 3:45PM
Oh Justme, it's heartening to see that someone else experienced the "but the baby book says you're supposed to sleep MORE" routine! My firstborn was, thankfully, a very good night sleeper- it's the ONLY thing that helped me through. Otherwise, he only would do two 20 minute naps a day, at the most! He gave them up completely by 23 months. I actually thought there was something wrong with my daughter after she was born, because she slept as much as those "normal infants" were supposed to....
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Betsy 12-05-2006 @ 5:13PM
I'm trying so hard to get sleep stuff sorted out before I go back to work next week, and my new daughter won't heed the advice in those books, either. Darn her. She seems like a smart girl otherwise...
I read things like: babies don't like to be awake for more than 2 hours, so watch for signs of sleepiness and soothe them to sleep.
Ok, but if she's been dozing off and jerking back awake for an hour, does that count as one of the two hours she's been awake, or as a nap?
Our days are driving me insane, because she's never well rested and happy (except for about 10 minutes after her every-two-hour feeds), but she WILL NOT SLEEP, either. I began giving her a pacifier in desperation after I realized she was comfort-nursing herself into projectile vomiting three times per day. The vomiting, thank goodness, is over. Yet I want the pacifier to be for sleep only, but if I'm ALWAYS trying to get her to sleep, what then? When I gave up the other day and took her out on an errand, she cried the whole time. And that's pretty much the deal with her. I'm surprised at how much it frustrates me.
Night time is ok - she drops off at 9:30 no matter when we start 'trying' to put her to bed, and she wakes every 2 -3 hours (which is getting old really fast) all night long. But at least she goes right back to sleep after I feed her.
My son (now 2 1/2) was a troublesome night-time sleeper, though he at least would nap. I don't know which is worse, actually.
I know it's supposed to pass, but I wish this period would go faster.
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