Mommy makeovers

"We all know about new-mom chic - the clogs, the ponytail, the same sweatpants we've worn for the last week"

Having kids is not an excuse to being frumpy.
I have a 2 1/2 girl and a 6 week old boy, and I take a shower, do my make-up and dress not in sweatpants first thing in the morning, along with getting my kids ready for the day.
I'm no Heidi Klum, but I got back into my regular clothes 11 days after my son was born. And even though I'm a SAHM, you do not find me frumpy and looking like something just spit me up.
It's a matter of pride in yourself, why is that women feel the need to let themselves go on the excuse of a newborn??
I wake up 3 times at night to breastfeed my son, then start the day with my toddler at 5:30am, and go around all day long, and even like that I think it's of the utmost importance to look good, not only for my husband not to find a good looking wife, but for my own self, taking a shower and looking good is something not negotiable.

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Well, I for one come down on the side of there being more important priorities for mothers than looking hot. I really hope that I can also instill in my daughter the idea that being sexually appealing to men should not be top of her list in terms of measuring her self worth.

That said, looking after your health and appearance is not a bad thing if you are doing it for yourself, and you don't see it as a measure of your value as a person. Too many women make that mistake. Personally after my baby was born, I spent months with messy hair and oversized pants, because I was busy learning how to be a good mom. Eventually, I found time to look after my appearance more, and it was nice to get that balance back, but I don't knock anyone for having other priorities.

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Our daughter just turned onem and my husband and I realized that we could not get away with the messy hair and unshaven look for much longer. People sympathise with the parents of newborns - parents of toddlers have had time to get their act together! Ha!

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My kids are 5 and 6 and I still look frumpy.

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When I had my baby I stayed comfortable, in sweatpants and sporting the ponytail. My priorities had changed. Makeup and getting "glammed uped" was the last thing on my mind - and I was happy! I spent my days adoring my child, not me. My husband even thought the new "mommy look" of comfy attire was sexy. After all, I looked this way because my days were spent worshiping our child! Children grow up too fast, and in the beginning phase, I think it's ok to focus on your newborn baby a little more than yourself. Showers were a necessity, but I went a long time before I broke out the makeup and hair products.

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I've seen this debate on mommy boards so many times and I never get the logic of the frumpy mom side. I'm all for people dressing and looking however they want, but being a mom in itself does not mean one has to look frumpy. Generally, women who cared about their looks before they became moms will continue to do so after. It doesn't mean your priorities are out of line - it takes no more time to put on cute clothes than to put on sweats. The fact that I feel that a little foundation and mascara brighten my face doesn't mean that I'm getting "glammed up" to be sexually appealing for men (other than maybe my husband on occasion!) And it takes less than 5 minutes to do, so again, no time away from the baby. I don't think nice clothes are uncomfortable (I'm talking cute jeans and a stylish top, not heels and a tight skirt). I would personally feel very uncomfortable if I left the house in sweats and spit-up stained clothes.

Just to make it clear again, I think women should look however they want. I just hate the idea that being a mom = frumpy. You could say the same thing about being an attorney: "I'm so busy with all my billable hours that I don't have time to look good", yet you never hear anyone say that.

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Wow Anna you must be young. When I just had my babies I wasn't interested in bleeding all over the pants that I was wearing if they were a pain to wash, and so sweats and yoga pants were it. Then after that is the spit up and dirty hands, or wetting my pants when I sneezed. Nevermind not being able to wear clothes that fit me before being pregnant, all the fat has gone into different places and my adominal muscles are stretched out too! I am impressed when anyone can dress well - and then I realize they have low maintenance babies and miracle bodies that bounce back quickly, and say to myself "Bully for them. I wish my kids were easier and I could bounce back that easily but then there is always someone prettier and smarter around the corner."

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My baby is 5 months old. I still have 20 pounds of baby weight still on me and on the weekends, I don't change out of my sweatpants! (yes, I do take showers and the sweatpants are clean!) My point is this: My husband finds me as sexy now as he did when we first met! It's supposed to be more than just about the physical with your husband by now!

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