6-year-old twins weren't his: should "dad" still pay child support?
Categories: Divorce & custody
There had always been rumors, but Dylan Davis chose to believe his wife when she told him that the couple's children were his. After the two divorced, Davis took a DNA test that proved he wasn't the father, but he was still required to pay $1,045 a month in child support.
That's because, currently, the law in Colorado requires men to to pay child support for children older than 5, even if they can prove they are not the biological father.
At first, this seems like obvious injustice, but the issue is more complicated. Especially in Davis' case, he'd lived with the children, who assumed he was their father, for 6 years. Though he still pays support (reduced to $663 because a change in employment status), he now has no contact with his children. Whether or not there is a biological connection, his sudden, complete absence from these children's lives must be hard on them. In addition, it's important that the children receive adequate support -- for obvious reasons.
But, regardless of who raised the children, shouldn't the responsibility for support fall on the biological father? Where's the guy the wife was having an affair with? Why isn't anyone chasing him down for money?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
Nicole 1-31-2007 @ 4:36PM
I think it's disgusting when men are forced to raise and support children who are not their own (the operative word being forced -- men and women who choose to adopt their partners' children or actively participate in the lives of their partners' children are some of the most selfless and dedicated people in the world). Fathers who can disprove paternity should NOT be forced to support children that are not theirs unless they choose to do so. Mothers get off scot free for being promiscuous, and the products of that are either supported by the government or by fathers who should have to. These children are going to suffer no matter what for having these types of mothers - the "father" should remove himself from the picture before any major harm can be done.
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Ethel 1-31-2007 @ 4:49PM
Its called "extra-pair copulatory behavior" and most species do it, and in the case of birds the male in support of the nest is the one charged with caring for all the chicks with the female.
In the case of humans, we consider the active father to be the father - not the biological father. If he had an issue the challenge should have been issued at birth, not when they are 4 years old and he has already assumed that role. I assume if the biological father stepped up the surrogate would be allowed to step down. But in general the courts recognize the parent who did the parenting to be the parent, not the biological one.
Certainly my niece, who at the age of 15, learned her father was not her biological father, stayed firm that my brother was her real dad, and so did my brother. Would it have been more appropriate to deny the relationship that they had developed over that time? The care that my brother had invested in that child? I also believe that the biological father of my niece lost out on a great kid, he only donated some semen, not his culture or self to her growth.
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Melissa 1-31-2007 @ 4:53PM
I 100% agree if a father is disproven even if they where married at the time of birth then he shouldn't have to pay. I'm kind of the same boat. i've been married for 10 years and 15 days my daughter will turn 10 in less than a week i'm wanting a divorce and willing to get a test to prove or disprove my daughter is his or not. but he's the one not willing to go through the test. Never has been even when we wheren't married. I belive he's not her father but he doesn't really care he loves her and will always love her. I'd like to know just incase she gets sick however
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Mary 1-31-2007 @ 5:01PM
I THINK THIS IS A VERY STUPID RULING, IF THAT WERE ME I WOULD JUST LEAVE AND NO ONE EVER SEE ME AGAIN. I WOULD NOT PAY FOR SOMEONE ELSE CHILDREN. WHY DON'T THEY FIND THE REAL DADS AND MAKE THEM PAY AND PAY THE WITCHIE WIFE THE MONEY. I DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR HER ONLY THE CHILDREN AND THE MAN THAT GOT DUPED. I WOULD PAY ANOTHER DIME TO THIS CAUSE.
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kristi 1-31-2007 @ 5:02PM
wake up america things need to change where is the real dad he should have to pay and for god sake maybe we would wanna be in there lives once he knew for sure he was the dad
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Alex 1-31-2007 @ 5:13PM
This article just renforces the belief that the courts still have the womens vote as a driving force.
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jason kral 1-31-2007 @ 5:40PM
I am a single full time father with custody of my son. First of all the guy shouldnt have to pay a dime. In fact he should be about to sue for the mental cruelty he has been through. To raise kids for 6 yrs find out they arent yours and still have to pay.....PLEASE on top of that he cant see them and has to pay. Colorado should be ashammed of itself for allowing this injustice to continue. Women have all the power when it comes to kids or so it would seem. Its time that stand up fathers and men in general have EQUAL RIGHTS when it come to kids.
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rcuenca4 1-31-2007 @ 6:44PM
Tell me why any man would think of getting married. A current average marriage statistically last for around 3 to 7 years. During this time the couple may have 1 to 2 children. When the marriage fails and ends up in divorce court mostly every time the guy is the one who is viewed as the criminal. He's forced to pay child support based upon his income even if the child ends up not being his. Depending on the mans income he may be required to pay any where from $500 to some cases$10,000 per month per child. Don't laugh just talk to a divorced doctor and see what he pays. Many laws now allow a women to leave the county or state where the child lives taking the child with them. This making it impossible for the Dad to see the child and also raising his child support threw the roof. Read this article then ask your yourself if marriage is a commitment of love or just an 18 year business venture set up by women for women.
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Rick 1-31-2007 @ 7:17PM
Tell me why any man would think of getting married. A current average marriage statistically last for around 3 to 7 years. During this time the couple may have 1 to 2 children. When the marriage fails and ends up in divorce court mostly every time the guy is the one who is viewed as the criminal. He's forced to pay child support based upon his income even if the child ends up not being his. Depending on the mans income he may be required to pay any where from $500 to some cases$10,000 per month per child. Don't laugh just talk to a divorced doctor and see what he pays. Many laws now allow a women to leave the county or state where the child lives taking the child with them. This making it impossible for the Dad to see the child and also raising his child support threw the roof. Read this article then ask your yourself if marriage is a commitment of love or just an 18 year business venture set up by women for women.
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Lee 1-31-2007 @ 7:36PM
Time for laws to catch-up. It is very sad that with the cause of living going up that Society can still be so cold to a hard working man. Equals rights has put women in the war zone, given them equal positive in the Board room, and the most important one are leading in education. I can speak from the heart because i delivered another man baby and she get him my last name and i pay for him with the same child support that i was sending for my own children and the man and the was not working. While in the meantime I am out fighting Wars for other countries. But the sad thing about any of this is not owning hard working mens can relate because so many dead beat father but thanks to a good attitude and spirit driven life i am still here and no thank to any law of congressman. What a cold prize to pay for just being a working class man. no Trump are any of the man in this positive but it would be nice just to be able to fly away.
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Gracie 1-31-2007 @ 7:37PM
I think that real sad.But the way I understand it, when children are born in a marriage, the husband is assumed to be the father. I mean he was supporting the kids before the marriage fell apart. I'm not saying it right, but if he thought the kids were not his he should have done what he did during the divorce,I will bet cash money he would not be paying now
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juliette 1-31-2007 @ 7:44PM
Since this mother was dishonest and is obviously playing games, he should call her bluff and file for sole custody. After having her life invaded by the court she'll back off.
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CAthy GIft 1-31-2007 @ 7:58PM
I think the exwife should have told him in the beginning so he can decide for himself if he wanted all the responsability. I think she should give all money back to him and drop the support. She needs to go after their real dad, What if those kids ever need his medical help.
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Karen 1-31-2007 @ 8:19PM
Fathers are treated grossly unfair in most places when it comes to support. Pennsylvania is a most horrible place for this. Even when the man was a decent, hard working man who loved his child and the woman choose to pursue other relationships he is still forced to pay for her escapades making it lucrative for such trashy behavior. Anyone care to comment?
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Michele W 1-31-2007 @ 10:39PM
Well at least I know my family is not the only one being screwed over by the system! He was lied to, why should he pay. This is the same situation we are in right now. Sorry this is so long but it is important that the whole story be told to understand. My husband was dating a girl 14 years ago, Charlotte got pregnant and said it was his. He was in the ARC house at the time but had seen her 1 time. Knowing that is all it takes he signed the papers when the baby was born, they named the baby a jr after him. support was ordered right away. They broke up when the baby was about 7 months old. She always dropped the baby off with his parents and wouldn't come back for days. I started dating him then. I already knew him for years. He got a phone call from Charlottes best friend telling him there were 3 other guys she slept with and din't really know who the dad was. She even told the names. Charlotte picked him because his family has alot of money. The next day she came to the house and he confronted her. She then admitted that yes she don't know who the father is. He told her that he wanted a DNA test done and he would let her know when it was. He told his parents what was going on and they were not happy with him getting a DNA test done. Why? We will never know. His parents went behind his back and talked her into giving them full custody. They had the papers drawn up and signed. His dad then tells him that they have custody now and they won't let a DNA test be done and that he now has no rights to the baby. We could not believe they did that and that was the last time we ever saw or talked to them for years. We didn't even invite them to our wedding. 6 years later I am pregnant with my first child. On his way home from work he got pulled over for speeding. The cop tells him that his license is suspended for non payment of child support. When he came home we had to figure out what child support ? we found out that she continued to claim she had the baby after she signed him away. She was getting welfare for a child she didn't have. Welfare fraud its called. We got a court hearing at the family court to try and get the support taken away since she did not have the kid. We had to contact his dad to get papers proving that she didnt have him. At the hearing she never shows and they can't find her. Even though we had all the proof, since she wasnt there for them to arrest her. They said he had to pay the 6 thousand dollars she stole. They just wanted thier money back. 6 THOUSAND $$$! He couldn't get his license back till it was paid off. He is self employed he needs to be able to get to work. This was so stressfull and so much arguing that I went into pre term labor 3 times and almost lost the baby because my blood pressure was so high. It got worse I had the baby in November and we had no money for christmas because he couldn't work. I was on bed rest for the last 3 months of pregnancy. Then I wasn't alloud to drive because of complications I had giving birth. My husband was so depressed because of what she had done that 2 weeks before christmas, he attempted suicide. Luckily I found him in time to save him. We eventually made it through everything and got ourselves back up on our feet almost 2 years later. We had just bought our first house and our son was a year and a half. We were there for about a year when it happened again. Charlotte came back around and his dad decided he didn't want the kid ( now 13 ) anymore since his wife died. He didnt want to be tied down. We get a letter in the mail from the family court for child support. Great! we can't even hardly make it ourselves let alone pay support. Plus we thought he wasn't responsable anymore. Our septic system had went and we had to dig up everything and bust our basement floor up tp put new stuff in. That got us way behind on our mortgage so we did a chapter 13 bankruptcy so we could pay it back and get caught up. I am not alloud to work because of my back. too young for surgery and would have a hard time with social security. Like I said we were barly making it. We got a lawyer and went to the hearing and we couldn't believe that they were making him pay support when they see we are almost not making it. !! years of living on our own and all the sudden we have to rearrange our whole life because she is forced to play mommy ! The support was set low but still way over what we had. I fought and argued about this because there is no way we could pay the bankruptcy payment to keep our house. We had some medical bills that we wanted to get rid of in the bankruptcy too. We didnt have any health insurance. The judges or nobody cared that we were losing everything. We explained about the paternity thing and they said that was our fault for listening to his parents. We were stuck. To make it all even worse, Charlotte was a crack addict. She had a police record tht was 2 inches thick. You know the money wouldnt go for the kid, it would go for her drug habbit just like the 6 thousand $ did. I even called the child support inforcment agency and told them that we are going to lose everything we got because of this. The lady said to me ( she represented Charlotte ) that they don't care what happens to me and my son. They will take everything off us and give it to her. In the end we were forced to switch to a chapter 7 so our medical bills would get paid but we lost our house and my car. Us the people who follow the law don't do drugs and pay taxes and take care of my kid we get nothing. The drug addict gets it all because she has to play mommy for once. She has never paid anything for that child ever. They made him pay though and it was her that should of paid. My son cried every night for weeks because he had to move from the only home he ever knew. Plus we had a dog that he was growing up with and we couldn't get rid of him. To make it worse she actually came after me one time while I had my son with me. I literally had to get into a fist fight with her to protect my son. We had to move away from our home town for the first time in 35 years. We got punished while she was praised. These laws have to be changed. It is not fair that if you sign the acknowledgment of paternity paper in the hospital you are screwed. This law gives the woman the right to lie and if you fall for it then oh well you have to pay not her. What kind of law gives someone the right to lie! I am still fighting this today. We lost everything and she had the kid for not even 2 months before CYS took the kids off her ( she had a total of 5 kids but 2 died because they were so addictted to crack they couldn't live all from differnt guys too.) The grandfather ended up getting permanent custody. Now we are going after his dad to do it right this time. Either he will adopt him or my husband is signing his rights away one way or the other. In my research I have found that the AOP paper can be challenged if you can prove that fraud was committed or if you were forced to sign it. Lieing about paternity is considered fraud to me. I will not give up untill someone does something about what happened to us because of the laws. I am telling my story to the state represenatives and anybody I can. These laws need to be changed. Do not let them do this to you if you are not the dad and was lied to. we need to fight this and win.
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Judy 1-31-2007 @ 10:43PM
I am not sure what to say about this case, it does seem very unfair but at the root, the judges are supposed to order the action that is in the best interst of the child, not the parents. I wonder if he is prohibited from disclosing his non-paternity to the child until she is of a certain age.
I would also like to point out that this blog post is here because it is noteworthy - because it is rare. Women and children are abandoned everyday by their splouses/fathers in their lives and the laws have evolved to protect the women, but more importantly, the children. Hardly anyone raises an eyebrow at a single mom raising her kids now.
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Uly 2-01-2007 @ 12:36AM
You know what's disgusting?
Waiting until after you get a divorce to disown the children who call you Daddy, just to save some money every month.
If he had his doubts about the paternity of his children, he should have aired them long ago. Instead, he acted to harm his ex-wife (who, for sure, did not act honorably at all) and instead wound up hurting these kids, who never did a thing to him other than to simply exist.
As for their biological father - does that man even know that he has kids? Or might have kids? Why should he be dragged in to take care of kids nobody told him even existed, when they already *have* a father, even a piss-poor excuse for one who'd rather not have the responsibility for them?
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Strode 2-01-2007 @ 7:55AM
I understand that the children can be devastated by his leaving. He is going to leave whether or not he pays. Sure he should have had the test done when the twins were born. He didn't. He chose to be the father even though he had a doubt, then he should pay. He did raise them as if they were his own. Didn't he? Did he allow these kids to call him Dad? I am a firm believer in a father's rights. I think that laws to protect men are important. I also think this proves that paternity tests should be mandatory. Women who have nothing to fear should have no problem with this, and it prevents a man from making a choice between his rights and keeping a baby he suspects may not be his to keep the baby's mother.
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RANDALL 2-01-2007 @ 8:28AM
HE SHOULD NOT HAVE TO PAY 1 PENNY IN ANY WAY FOR THE KIDS . THEY ARE NOT HIS SO NOW HOW CAN YOU EXPECT FOR THEM TO BE HIS RESPONESIBILITY IN ANY WAY LEGALY !!!! SHE AND MANY MORE WOMEN LIKE HER KNOW THEY ARE A VERY GOOD CHANCE THAT THESE CHILDERN ARENT HIS BUT THEY STILL DONT SAY ANYTHING !!! THE WOMEN SHOULD NOW GO AFTER THE MAN OR MEN DEPENDING HOW BIG OF A SLUT SHE IS . AND IF SHE DOESNT KNOW WHO THE FATHER OR FATHERS ARE OR WERE THEY LIVE NOW . THEY HAVE NO REASON TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS AND EVERY REASON TO JUST KEEP HER MOUTH SHUT AND LET THIS MAN PAY ALL OF THE CHILD SUPPORT . BECAUSE IF SHE WERE TO SAY SOMETHING SHE MAY NOT GET ANY CHILD SUPPORT OR ALOT LESS SO SHE HAS EVERY REASON TO NOT SAY ANYTHING . BECAUSE EVEN IF THIS IS FOUND OUT LATER THEY WILL NOT DO ONE THING TO HER , NOT EVEN STOP THE HER CHILD SUPPORT OR EVEN LOWER IT . I THINK SHE SHOULD HAVE TO PAY BACK EVERY PENNY WITH INTEREST AND SHE SHOULD BE CHARGED WITH FRAUD AT THE VERY LEAST . ALSO SHE KNEW THAT THERE WAS A VERY GOOD CHANCE THAT HE WAS NOT THE FATHER OF ONE OR UP TO ALL OF THEM NOT BEING HIS !!!! BUT BECAUSE OF THE WAY THE LAW IS SET UP SHE CANT BE CHARGED FOR WITHHOLDING EVEDEDNCE AND POSSIBLY PERGIRY . BECAUSE THEIR IS NO LAWS OR WAYS OF ANY TYPE FOR HER TO GET IN TROUBLE EVEN IF DOWN THE ROAD THIS IS FOUND OUT JUST LIKE NOW , WHY SHOULD SHE SAY ANYTHING AT ALL . I THINK THIS SHOULD BE CHANGED SO SHE WILL TELL THE TRUTH AND ALL THE TRUE SO LATER DOWN THE ROAD SHE CAN GET INTO ALOT OF TROUBLE FOR NOT TELLING THE WHOLE TRUTH OR WITH HOLDING ANYTHING BACK !!! I THINK SHE COMMITED PERGIRY AND MOST LIKEY SOME OTHER CRIMES AS WELL . SHE ALSO SHOULD HAVE TO PAY ALL OF THE CHILD SUPPORT HE PAID FROM THE START OF THE DIVORCE JUST FOR STARTERS , PLUS INTEREST ON THIS MONEY . AND THIS MONEY SHOULD COME FROM THE TRUE FATHER OR FATHERS BECAUSE THEY ARE GOING TO OWE HER ALL THE MONEY THAT THIS MAN HAD TO PAY WRONGLY !!! AND WERE DO YOU EVEN BEGIN TO START AGAINST HER FOR LETTING THIS MAN THINK THESE CHILDERN WERE HIS , CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW MUCH THAT MUST HURT TO FINDOUT THAT THE CHILDERN YOU LOVE SO DEARLY ARE NOT YOURS , AND NOW ,DO YOU GET ANY RIGHTS TO THEM AFTER THE TRUE FATHER OR FATHERS ARE TOLD THEY ARE THE FATHER OR FATHERS NOW , DOES THE REAL FATHER NOW TAKE AWAY SOME OF OR ALL OF HIS RIGHTS TO THEM , OTHER THAN LETTING HIM KEEP PAYING CHILD SUPPORT , IF HE IS A REAL DEAD BEAT BUTT HOLE TYPE PERSON I FEEL SORRY FOR THE CHILDERN BUT YOU CANT EXPECT THIS MAN TO KEEP PAYING FOR SOMEONE ELSES FAULTS AND WRONG DOINGS AT THE LEAST .
AND TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT ON MY PART MY NOW EX-WIFE CHEATED ON ME AND WAS TOLD BY HEAR FAMILY SHE REALLY THOUGHT THEY BELONGED TO HIM AND WHEN I FOUND OUT 3 DAYS AFTER THEY WERE BORN . I WENT INTO THE HOSPITAL TO SEE THEM AND GUESS WHOS NAME WAS ON THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE AS THE FATHER , YES MINE BECAUSE I MADE ALOT MORE MONEY THAN HIM PLUS HE ALREADY HAD 2 DIVIORCES AND 3 UNDER THE AGE OF 18 CHILDERN HE WAS PAYING ALITTLE ON SUPPORT ON . AND ALSO I FOUND OUT WHEN HE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL WITH HER HE WAS USEING MY NAME AND SAYING HE WAS ME AND HE WAS THE FATHER . WOW SO HOW LONG IVE WANTED TO TELL THIS TO SOMEONE THAT WOULD REALLY LISTEN TO ME !!!!!
PS BY THE WAY THEY WERE TWIN BOYS AND I HAD A DNA TEST DONE BEFORE THE DIVIORCE WAS FINAL . BUT I WAS GLAD THEY WERE MINE !!!
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long island red 2-01-2007 @ 8:40AM
I think it is quite convenient that until child support was to be incurred that the man in this case dd nothing to prove or disprove the paternity of these children...in this day and age not even a blood test is required...he had doubts supposedly from the get go...why not do a buccal swab and have the answer when the children were born?? Perhaps the mother of the kids actually believed that her hubby was the father....
In this day and age of "father's rights" which basically say we want to do xyz but only when it is convenient for us...to is up to the men to protect their ASSets...In my opinion the "fathers' rights" jokers are more concerned about their rights than their childrens needs....they insists on having all sorts of visistation listed to avoid the full amount of child support due to "shared parenting", but these are rights for the fathers not responsibilities toward their children...
where are these so called fathers on the evenings that arent convenient for their girlfriends? or their own wants??
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