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Two million potential parents
Filed under: Adoption, Gay Parenting, Development/Milestones: Babies
I don't know how many kids there are out there waiting to be adopted, but I can tell you there are at least two million adults waiting to adopt them, according to a new study from the Williams Institute at UCLA. The problem is, there are those who would like to see laws passed that would prevent these people from ever adopting or becoming foster parents. Why would they want to stop such an obviously good thing? Simply because the prospective parents are gays and lesbians.According to the study [pdf], more than 65,000 adopted kids are living with a gay or lesbian parent -- that's about one in every twenty-five adopted children. Further, another 14,000 foster kids are living with gay or lesbian parents. The impact is clear -- GLB parents are a significant, positive force in the caring of future generations.
Aside from the cold, hard numbers, however, this is all about the desire for family, the need to love a child. Jared and I just finished reading a book last night that talked about "everyday magic," including the magic of family. We have some neighbors -- two men -- who have adopted a little boy. The love they have for their son is so clear, so strong, so powerful, that it makes me want to rush home and hug Jared and Sara. With this huge pool of potential parents waiting to adopt -- and, in some cases, waiting to be able to adopt, -- it is amazing that anyone would want to deny children such a loving, caring home.
Thanks to Mombian for the link
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
4-03-2007 @ 2:49PM
LS said...I have been doing a LOT of soul-searching about this issue. (A lot of that searching has to do with the folks here on BB...) I think that I have narrowed down at least one source for my knee-jerk reaction to the idea of same-sex couples adopting children.
It is a stereotype. All too often, we see (just like with any group... black, white, man, woman, etc) just a stereotype of the "Gay Lifestyle"... Flamboyant, wimpy, noodle-limbed men. Mannish, aggressive, male-bashing women. Drag queens. All are usually portrayed as having nothing but promiscuous sex on their minds 24/7.
Given this stereotype, I think it is understandable why people have, like me, a knee-jerk reaction and say, "No! Why would you place a child in that atmosphere?" But then some of us look further, and are required to examine those reaction, and admit that perhaps we're being hasty.
I am coming around to say that I really don't have a problem with same-sex adoption. Where I have the problem is when it becomes such a political issue. When that happens, it becomes more about the extremes than about the kids who have no family, and the families who want to love them.
Reply
4-03-2007 @ 4:06PM
JenInTX said...I have no issue with this and feel that gay couples should have all the same rights (and responsibilities) that straight couples do- from adoption to marriage and everything in between.
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4-03-2007 @ 4:11PM
Ann Adams said...Hi LS!!
The sound you hear is me applauding.
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4-03-2007 @ 4:31PM
Uncle Roger said...Sure, given many stereotypes, one could say kids shouldn't be around any adults. These kinds of people are violent, rule them out. These folks are too wishy-washy, can't let them have kids.
The fact of the matter is that most gays and lesbians are very caring, loving people who aren't all that different from anyone else. Of all the LGBT folks I know all but one are looking for a longterm, monogamous, committed relationship. That one is in a long term open relationship. Of the straight folks I know, a lot of them are after a longterm, monogamous committed relationship, but there are also a lot who are just after fun. I have one very dear friend who seems to think about sex continuously, and he's straight.
The point is that when you have someone who says "I want to love and care for a child," they should be able to do so, especially when there are so many kids so desperately in need of that kind of caring.
I know a lot of women who focus excessively on their appearance -- clothing, make-up, weight -- to the point where their pre-school daughters want to go clothes shopping and wear make-up and high heels. Is that a good atmosphere for a child? What about all those fathers who work too much, then come home and sit around drinking beer and watching football? Not a healthy role model. Fathers who hit their wives? Mothers who nag too much?
If we watch too much Jerry Springer, we could easily decide that we need to round up all the kids in the world and ship 'em off to another planet for their own safety. Luckily, Springer's guests aren't the norm. The norm is a lot more, well, normal.
My neighbors are a wonderful couple and the love they have for their son is so obvious, you couldn't possibly miss it. I took a beautiful photo of one of the dads and the boy sitting on the curb together sharing a cupcake. The adoration on the dad's face is priceless -- and universal. That's the sort of dad I'd want for my kids, if I couldn't be there for them.
Here's a couple more stories on this subject:
http://www.parentdish.com/2006/10/12/two-mommies-two-daddies-and-a-whole-lotta-photos/
http://www.parentdish.com/2006/10/06/five-kids-a-church-and-the-couple-that-needed-them-all/
That second one still makes me tear up.
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4-03-2007 @ 11:40PM
Dana said...Thanks for covering this, Roger, and thanks for your continuing support for LGBT families.
(I also commend LS for being willing to reexamine his views and change his mind. Not everyone is so brave. I'll also add: we're parents, just like any others. We're lucky if we have sex at all, let alone 24/7.)
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