Banking on motherhood

Filed under: Your Pregnancy, Health & Safety: Babies, Medical Conditions

Okay, so say you're a young woman, looking into the future and planning your life. Your teenage years will be awkward, a time to learn about inter-personal relationships, even as you come to grips with the hormones raging through your body as it becomes fully grown. Not a time to take on a major responsibility like parenthood.

Next up, your twenties -- college, parties, perhaps even casual sex. You're probably looking for love. Then you're in your thirties, building your career, experiencing the world as an adult. On to your forties and you're settling down and moving up in the world. Pretty soon you hit your fifties and you figure you're ready for kids, only your body says oops, sorry, that train left the station a while ago.

So, what's a forward-thinking woman to do? Why, bank her eggs, of course! That's what Tessa Darley did. She had a half dozen of her eggs frozen so that at some point in the future, she can have a baby, no matter her age. For now, she can "devote time to my career, take my time finding Mr. Right and know that when I deem the time is right, even if I am menopausal, I can still have my own baby."

She is one of the first women in Britain to have her eggs frozen for no other reason than to insure her ability to have a child at a later date. She has yet to find Mr. Right and wants to make sure that, when she does, they will be able to have children. "The problem for me is that I haven't yet met the man I want to be a father to my children. And it may be that by the time I do meet him, I will no longer be able to have children naturally."

While some may question the idea of storing one's eggs for use later in life, Tessa Darley thinks it's the best thing she's ever done. "Now there is no pressure on me to meet the perfect man, and men seem more attracted to me -- I have never felt so relaxed," she says. As for those who may raise ethical or philosophical objections, she notes that "the idea that women may be able to control their fertility may be frightening to some people, but in reality it is liberating." I say good for her.

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.