ParentDish Feature: What are you reading? Life-changing books

Interesting question. I am sure I will miss some books by virtue of wanting to respond before I get too busy to do so.

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by CS Lewis - because these books, for me, showed how the struggle for good and evil can be carried out on this plane (despite their being sci-fi/fantasy books) and also showed how good does trump evil but often at great sacrifice.

The Talisman by Peter Straub & Stephen King - a book masquerading as horror but with a story of deep love and great courage behind it. I encourage anyone who hasn't picked it up for fear of finding just another scary story to read it - especially here, because the story, in a nutshell, is about a young boy's quest to save his mother from dying. He literally has to cross the country, moving in and out of alternate realities, avoiding powerful enemies and making endearing friends. Sacrifice is also a theme here, and to see what this young boy endures is just amazing.

Paula, by Isabel Allende. I actually recalled this book recently when reading Sweet/Salty about Kate's loss. This is Isabel's biography, of sorts, of her daughter Paula, who died as an adult. Allende's writing is no less stellar here than it is in her fiction, and the truth of it makes it even more moving. This was one of those books that I cried reading, and after reading it I was in a sort of silent stupor for a few days.

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It occurred to me that I didn't answer why these are life-changing books. I guess when I read these books, and when I pick them up and read them again every few years, I am reminded of something much bigger than me. I am reminded of the immeasurable depths of both love and loss. I am reminded of what it means to be courageous and how sometimes you have to let yourself lose a battle to win a much larger war. The book Paula was written with much of the same grief couched in peace and lightness that Kate used when she spoke of losing Liam. I think this helped reinforce my own view of death, that it is not permanent, it is not a loss in quite the way it is traditionally viewed - and yet, it is no less painful for those of us who see this earthbound existence as just another plane and believe that we'll encounter our loved ones somewhere else, whether in heaven or in the stars or whatever.

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There are so many books that have changed my life.

The first one is probably the most currently relevant: Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. I named my son after Johnny Mercer, after all. I've read that book probably ten times. My mom and I still laugh about how we'd hear the other one in the other room laughing about certain parts of the book, late at night.

Another is To Kill a Mockingbird. It was the book that made me want to be a writer, and to learn to love being from the South.

Another is Confederacy of Dunces. If you haven't read it, it's a must. No American writer, in my humble opinion, comes close to creating such amazingly well-defined characters as Toole. And boy is it funny. They'll never be able to make a movie out of it like they've been trying to for years b/c a movie could never do it justice.

The list could go on forever, but I will end it with a book that probably changed me more than any book: One Hundred Years of Solitude. The writing is intense and beautiful. It's my Prayer for Owen Meany.

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The Five People You Meet In Heaven by Mitch Albom - this is a great book that makes you think about life after death. I'm sure it doesn't really work this way but it should.

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The Razor's Edge was a life changing book for me as well. I love Maughm. All of his books.

Other life changing books:

Pride and Prejudice--Jane Austin
Midnight's Children--Salman Rushdie
A Fine Balance--Mistry Rohinton
Palace Walk--Naguib Mahfouz
A Child in Time--Ian McEwan
What's Bred in the Bone--Robertson Davies
and my all time favorite
East Lynne--Mrs Henry Woods (Ellen)

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I couldn't think of any books the first time I read this, but now I think I would include "5 Little Peppers and How They Grew", an old book about a family of children who happened to be quite poor. I had read Little Women and how they were poor, but the 5 Little Peppers were really, really poor. It made me realize as a young child how lucky I was to have enough food to eat and get birthday presents and things like that.

No Logo made me really think about where my clothes come from and I can't enter certain stores after reading it as I feel sick thinking about some of the things I read in the book.

Think Pink made me realize how much sexist crap the generation before me was engulfed in. It was a funny book but I was shocked to read some of the examples it gave of real advertising and such.

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I must have read Little Women 20 times when I was a kid. Jo was my hero.

And "To Kill a Mockingbird" of course although my opinions were already in place. The book reinforced them as did "My Lord, What a Morning", the autobiography of Marian Anderson, my real life hero.

I just finished "Her Sister's Keeper". Good book up to the last chapter, at least to me. And I didn't have to read it chapter by chapter at Barnes & Noble.

To quote Blanche:

"I have always depended on the kindness of strangers".

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Ann- I read My Sister's Keeper this week as well. It was good.. a really good idea for a storyline but the writing seemed melodramatic at times (esp between the lawyer and the guardian). The end really surprised me though, never saw that coming.

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Little Women was definitely one of those books that shaped how I thought life should be. It also made me desperate to have sisters, although they had their share of issues (I have two brothers). When I was young I also read Homecoming by Cynthia Voigt. I read it like twenty years ago, and I still remember so many random details. I think it was the fact that the girl in the book was so strong while she was not much older than I was, I guess it kind of made me feel that if anything happened to me I could pull myself and my brothers through it (we had a lot of financial and personal uncertainty in our lives at that time). I know I have read book since then that have influenced me, but I can only remember The Stranger because you mentioned it, and then a play also by Camus called Les Justes (I guess in English it means The Just Ones). Les Justes I read in high school, and it seemed so deep and meaningful to me then (but I have not picked it up since). I read The Stranger in high school also, but I did not really care for it until I read it again five years later in a college French class (in French). It floored me for days. I couldn't even talk about it in class, and my professor actually held me after class to ask if I was okay and I almost couldn't even form the words to tell her how it had affected me. I don't really like the other existentialists at all, although I guess if you include Ionesco I can deal with him alright. I still can't articulate what it is about Camus that spoke to me, but later in a graduate class, a professor mentioned that many French philosopher types actually try to illustrate their ideas through the way they write about their ideas, and I think that complete kind of immersion got to me somehow. This is way too long already, but I have issues with Paula and Allende that perhaps I will revisit another day.

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