Does your family take separate vacations?
Categories: Just for moms, Just for dads, Fun & activities, Places to go
I haven't had a real vacation in years. In fact, the last time I went somewhere far away just for fun was in 2000. My husband and I spent one glorious week on Abaco island in the Bahamas. We swam, boated and beached to our heart's content. For all of our differences, the one thing we agree on is what makes a perfect vacation.
But not everyone enjoys sipping fruity drinks on a beach and doing nothing for hours on end. In that case, you can either compromise and try to find something that you both can enjoy. Or, you can do what more and more families seem to be doing and take your time off separately.
While my husband and I do like to relax in the same fashion, there is something to be said for having some time apart. I haven't done it yet, but we have agreed that at some point in the near future, I will take a trip by myself somewhere quiet. This is less about what I plan to do and more about just doing it alone. Not everyone needs that space, but I sure do. And my husband is more than okay with it. He knows that having some time for myself will make me happy. And that makes him happy, too.
Not everyone thinks this is a good idea. In fact, Ruth Houston, an infidelity expert, says that summer is prime time for extramarital affairs and that some people actually plan separate vacations so they can cheat on their spouses. Some of my friends have expressed similar concerns. What do you think about couples who take separate vacations?
But not everyone enjoys sipping fruity drinks on a beach and doing nothing for hours on end. In that case, you can either compromise and try to find something that you both can enjoy. Or, you can do what more and more families seem to be doing and take your time off separately.
While my husband and I do like to relax in the same fashion, there is something to be said for having some time apart. I haven't done it yet, but we have agreed that at some point in the near future, I will take a trip by myself somewhere quiet. This is less about what I plan to do and more about just doing it alone. Not everyone needs that space, but I sure do. And my husband is more than okay with it. He knows that having some time for myself will make me happy. And that makes him happy, too.
Not everyone thinks this is a good idea. In fact, Ruth Houston, an infidelity expert, says that summer is prime time for extramarital affairs and that some people actually plan separate vacations so they can cheat on their spouses. Some of my friends have expressed similar concerns. What do you think about couples who take separate vacations?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Ginny 7-17-2007 @ 2:55PM
I don't know why a couple couldn't find something they both want to do. When my husband and I were just a couple, we could have had fun anywhere. Now, that we have children, it is a different story. I took a vacation with my children (and without my husband) to a family reunion for a week. It was because my DH couldn't get the time off. Truthfully, I think he preferred not to go spend a week with my extended family anyway. If it is just a vacation for fun, we prefer to be together.
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caitlin 7-17-2007 @ 3:26PM
I have been taking separate mini vacations for almost 2 years now. I find that as a SAHM, a vacation with the whole family isn't a vacation for me. It is just being a SAHM in a different location. I still find myself cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, and being the primary caregiver.
Mini-vacations save my sanity, and they let me do the things that my family isn't interested in. Vacations with just my husband and I are very hard to come by, since it means we're either flying a grandma in, or we're going somewhere that we can work in a trip to southern Louisiana to drop off our son.
My husband is taking his first vacation without me in September. He's riding the C&O towpath from Pittsburgh to DC on his bike. As a SAHM, I just don't have the energy or time to be able to build up enough mileage to bike 50+ miles a day for over a week. But my husband bike commutes and can easily do a bit over 200 miles a week, and is really looking forward to touring. I don't think my lack of ability should hold him back.
It works for us, but it's one of those things that doesn't work for everyone.
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Jack 7-17-2007 @ 3:47PM
I don't always take every vacation with my wife, but I do share everything with my buddy:
http://www.fakebuddy.com/
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leian 7-17-2007 @ 3:58PM
I think these are great for couples with separate interests or if you want to spend some time with friends. Thankfully, though, I've never had the inclination to do it because my husband and I share most of the same interests, particularly when it comes to hobbies/activities, and we truly enjoy each other's company. The few times I've had to travel without him (mainly on business)I've always wished that he was there. Not that missing him is a bad thing, but I really like my husband as well as love him and we enjoy so much of the same things that we don't need to be separated to enjoy our time "off." As far as leaving the kids goes, I just had a baby so that's not going to happen any time soon and frankly both of our families differ from us so vastly in how they would monitor our kids that the thought of leaving them for a week in their care makes both me and hubby shudder... So, end result? We all travel together and will probably continue to do so (which is probably why I'm obsessed with researching family vacations...)
http://www.childofleisure.com
http://drinkleidownpassout.blogspot.com
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M4Mommy 7-17-2007 @ 4:45PM
we havent taken separate vacations, yet. But we do have different interests and do our own "thing" through out the year. Hubby's "thing" isnt horses. I am more than fine with that as horses being my thing gives me that time free aka alone!!
Hubby goes on long "game" LARP weekends with his friends. Well not so much lately. He gets his "time" to do his thing.
This year he has taken more time off than any previous summer and has been spending it with us. I love it. Our daughter loves it and we are planning on someday taking a "family vacation" together. With luck before our girl decides we are terribly embarrassing to her and she hates us. ;)
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Eva 7-17-2007 @ 7:30PM
If we don't vacation together, when are we going to have sex?
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Chris 7-24-2007 @ 7:10PM
Abaco is a beautiful destination for children - and if you're visiting Hope Town (one of Abaco's cays) you can rent lots of baby equipment, which saves taking it all with you - see http://www.freewebs.com/tinytravelers-hopetown/index.htm
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