Would you wear this badge?
This was just too funny to pass up. Many of you may be familiar with the antics of the folks over at Dadsmacker, a site devoted to pointing out just how uncool all us again hipster parents are even though we think quite the opposite. The site also draws attention to hoity-toity (how do you even spell that???), meaning over-priced clothing and accessories for children.
Now they've drawn attention to merit badges for moms. No joke, someone dreamed up this little ditty and before you know it these badges are going to be selling like hotcakes. I went to the site myself to see what the fanfare was all about.
Mama Merit Badges offers badges for everything a mom does, sort of like when you were in Brownies and they gave you a patch for learning how to do basic things a gal should know how to do (how antiquated!). My favorite, and clearly the one that caught the attention of our brothers in blogging Dadsmacker, is the one for breastfeeding. It's a badge of a rather perky looking boob.
That perky boob looks a little suspect to me since I'm breastfeeding, and, uhm, my boobs do NOT look like those boobs. Perhaps the badge implies that after you're finished with breastfeeding you WILL get back your perky boobs? If so, those people should be sued.
Other badges include one for changing diapers and one for handling tantrums. You can go all the way and buy them all for $45 or singly for $5 each. Now come on, who doesn't have $5 to fork over for a good mom?
I didn't see one for putting up with your spouse's crappy parenting style or one for pumping at work, which is harder and more of a pain in the butt than giving birth. I also didn't see one for being nice without having slept for three months straight or one for doing everything with one hand. Or for going all day without using the restroom because your baby won't let you put him down. Or one for giving up the dream of ever looking as hot as you did before you got knocked up.
But, I digress.
I guess the badges offered at this site, barring the breastfeeding one, could be given to dads too. Personally, though, I'd rather you spent that fiver on a Starbucks iced chai latte than a badge. Although the one with the booby on it is pretty cute.
Thanks to the rad daddies at Dadsmacker for directing my attention to the booby badge.