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Parenting in all its suckiness and wonder
Filed under: Just For Moms, Development/Milestones: Babies
I love this entry of Kristin's, because I was thinking about the exact same subject recently.
Well, specifically, I was sitting on my couch with my head in my hands while my son threw his fifty-third tantrum of the day, thinking how very much I wished I could just get up and leave the house, drive to the airport, and board a plane headed for a beach in Thailand. Or at the very least, that I could leave the house and go see a movie.
Or just be in my house, doing whatever I wanted, without some three-foot-tall human making my life miserable.
I was thinking, at that moment, that I would never tell someone that having kids was great, because a lot of the time it isn't great. Sometimes it downright sucks, in fact, and giving up your lifestyle of choice-even if we're just talking about the ability to read a book when you feel like it, or sleep in, or eat a leisurely meal-in favor of all the tedious moments that come with parenthood . . . well, it's not insignificant. There are times when parenthood is a burden, a never-ending testing of your patience, and a massive pain in the ass.
Oh, but the other times. What can I even say? As Kristin wrote, it's nearly impossible to describe what it is like to have a piece of your soul running on the earth beside you.
I've always hated it when people say "having children is the most rewarding thing you can do with your life", because I think it belittles all the choices that don't have anything to do with procreating. But the fact is, it's been the most rewarding thing I've done with my own life, despite the dreary days.
I don't really know what I'd say if someone told me they weren't sure if they ever wanted children, and what my .02 on the subject might be. I'd tell them the truth, that I wasn't sure I wanted children either, and that my decision to do so felt terrifying and unsure from day one. That it's been harder than I ever could have guessed. But also that it's so much better, that there are so many times when I cannot believe how much joy there is in my little world.
My life has grown and blossomed in a million ways since my son's birth. My heart has never known such love. I imagine there will always be days when I wish I could get on that plane, but I am so glad that I'm right here.
Well, specifically, I was sitting on my couch with my head in my hands while my son threw his fifty-third tantrum of the day, thinking how very much I wished I could just get up and leave the house, drive to the airport, and board a plane headed for a beach in Thailand. Or at the very least, that I could leave the house and go see a movie.
Or just be in my house, doing whatever I wanted, without some three-foot-tall human making my life miserable.
I was thinking, at that moment, that I would never tell someone that having kids was great, because a lot of the time it isn't great. Sometimes it downright sucks, in fact, and giving up your lifestyle of choice-even if we're just talking about the ability to read a book when you feel like it, or sleep in, or eat a leisurely meal-in favor of all the tedious moments that come with parenthood . . . well, it's not insignificant. There are times when parenthood is a burden, a never-ending testing of your patience, and a massive pain in the ass.
Oh, but the other times. What can I even say? As Kristin wrote, it's nearly impossible to describe what it is like to have a piece of your soul running on the earth beside you.
I've always hated it when people say "having children is the most rewarding thing you can do with your life", because I think it belittles all the choices that don't have anything to do with procreating. But the fact is, it's been the most rewarding thing I've done with my own life, despite the dreary days.
I don't really know what I'd say if someone told me they weren't sure if they ever wanted children, and what my .02 on the subject might be. I'd tell them the truth, that I wasn't sure I wanted children either, and that my decision to do so felt terrifying and unsure from day one. That it's been harder than I ever could have guessed. But also that it's so much better, that there are so many times when I cannot believe how much joy there is in my little world.
My life has grown and blossomed in a million ways since my son's birth. My heart has never known such love. I imagine there will always be days when I wish I could get on that plane, but I am so glad that I'm right here.












ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
1-01-2008 @ 4:18PM
Danell said...It's these posts that always make me sniffle furiously. I always want to forward them to all of my friends without kids and say "here, read this...this is exactly IT."
Reply
1-01-2008 @ 3:42PM
Danell said...Oh, and also...it's been thrilling reading all of the entries about your second pregnancy, and now I shall have to go back and reread them all for reassurance because three days ago...THERE WERE TWO PINK LINES HERE.
Reply
1-04-2008 @ 3:01PM
Ginitag said...First off ; Congratulations Danell!
And Linda - you hit the nail on the head. There are days when I wonder "What have I gotten myself into?" but then one of the boys smiles at me, or shouts "MAMI" gleefully or makes a silly face, and then I remember. Thanks!
GG
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