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Man sues to get son out of catholic school
Filed under: Teens, Divorce & Custody, Alcohol & Drugs, Day Care & Education
Jennifer Jordan wrote about a couple that is being told they cannot adopt because of their beliefs -- or more accurately, their lack of beliefs. At the heart of that issue is one judge's belief that the state constitution, which says "no person shall be deprived of the inestimable privilege of worshiping Almighty God in a manner agreeable to the dictates of his own conscience," means that a child cannot be raised in an atheist home.Of course, the glaring flaw in that logic is that that interpretation means that a child cannot be raised in a Christian home (because that would prevent them from worshipping Ganesh) or in a Hindu home (because that would prevent them from worshipping Mohammed) and so on. Whatever the faith (if any) of the parents, the kids are going to be influenced by it and thus discouraged from exploring other religions.
How many devout Catholic parents are going to encourage or even allow their kids to read the Book of Mormon? I know my mother absolutely forbid it and didn't like me hanging out with members of that "cult," as she called it. Basically, most religions, as well as the lack of one, are exclusive to others, so it really doesn't make for a good justification either way.
Well, for David Ryan, in Kentucky, the situation is not so simple. He is an atheist, but his ex-wife is Catholic. When they got divorced, the judge ordered that their son continue attending a Catholic high school. Ryan, however, wants his son in the public school, out of reach of the church. "David feels the orientation and the indoctrination of the church school is harmful to his child," said Edwin Kagin, Ryan's lawyer.
Kentucky's constitution says that "Nor shall any man be compelled to send his child to any school to which he may be conscientiously opposed." What happens, however, when two parents disagree? Does Ryan have any more right to impose his beliefs on his son than his wife does? Kagin is spinning this as a first amendment separation issue, but I disagree -- I don't think this is a matter of church-and-state at all. It seems to me that it is simply a disagreement between two parents on how to best raise their child.
The thing is, the two options -- Catholic school and public school -- are not in opposition. While the Catholic school will be teaching a specific set of beliefs, public schools leave the teaching of any belief system up to the parents (at least in theory). The father is not asking that his son be sent to the we-hate-God school, just to the we-have-no-opinion-ask-your-parents school. Of course, given that the child in question is in high school, I think what he wants and what he believes has great bearing on the case.
I do know of one family where the parents have different beliefs and the kids are going to catholic school, and it seems to be working out. Truth be told, I'm not sure what to think about this -- I simply don't have enough information about the specific case. I do think that it is entirely possible to go to Catholic school and still end up an atheist, even more so if the father discusses his beliefs with his son outside of school. On the other hand, I know I would be extremely upset if someone tried to put my kids in a religious school.
What do you think? Should the kid continue at the Catholic high school or should they opt for taking care of the religious education outside the classroom?
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
2-06-2008 @ 10:02PM
isisaquaria said...I wonder if the child expressed a desire to dad to leave his current school--The child has a right to say his choice in front of a non-biased advocate--remove the parents from the chambers. The article is not clear on where the sudden mindset arose from...he could be bitter, she could be breaking a time line--I know alot of kids who go to public school for sports that private (religious-based) do not always have after going to the younger grades in Catholic schools. The child may have started it--we just do not have all the details.
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1-07-2008 @ 1:44PM
Suzanne said...That's an interesting case. It seems like the wishes of the child should be considered strongly in this case. As a high school student, he is old enough to at least have an opinion, if not a final decision. Honestly, taking the kid out of the school won't solve his issue. If the mom is the one deciding the school she is likely the primary custodial parent. And she's probably dictating whether they say grace before meals, whether they go to church, etc. Taking him out of school won't keep him out of reach of the church.
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1-07-2008 @ 2:05PM
Lori said...I agree, this is really just about two parents having a disagreement. I'm not a legal expert, but in this case I'd side with the Mom. The boy was attending Catholic school prior to the couple's divorce. So, at some point the pair made a joint decision to send their son to Catholic school. Why should that change simply because of a divorce? However, I do disagree with Roger when he says the child's opinion should "weigh heavily in the decision." Making him decide something like this would just put him in the middle of his parent's argument -- not a good place for a child of 14 to be.
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1-07-2008 @ 2:18PM
Joy said...This to me isn’t as much about religion as it is to keeping as much in tact at this hard time for the child. I would "assume" that this child has gone to this school up to this point? Why is dad so suddenly against it?
While I agree that he’s old enough to make his own decision, I’m not sure that’s the “right” thing to do either. If he picks the school he’s in now, he’s taking mom’s “side.” If he wants to switch schools, he’s taking dad’s. I’m not sure that’s fair to put him through either. If they are “disagreeing” about this, I can most certainly believe they are “disagreeing” about other things as well. If it were me, I’d see how he’s doing where he’s at. If his grades are good and he’s happy and well adjusted, he may be better off where he’s comfortable. Things at home are changing and maybe more change right now wouldn‘t be beneficial to him. I’m thinking more of the boy and I really feel it’s unfair to put kids through “picking sides.” UNLESS things at school aren’t going well. This might just be dad trying to “pick on mom.”
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1-07-2008 @ 2:47PM
Meagan said...After looking at the article it sounds like it's not a question of switching schools. The kid is an eighth grader, so the fight is over whether he'll attend a public or Catholic high school next year. I went to Catholic school myself, and switching out between middle school and high school is common so it probably wouldn't be over-traumatic.
That said, I agree that this case is more about a disagreement between a divorcing couple than it is about church and state. The last line in the article, by Ryan's lawyer: “My client strongly feels that the best interest of the child is served by teaching the child the courts, as well as all citizens, must obey the law and the constitution under which we live,” he said. That strikes me as insincere jargon.
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1-07-2008 @ 4:54PM
Ann Adams said...Sounds like a power struggle to me too. If that boy has been in a Catholic school for 8 years without suffering any damage, I fail to see the father's sudden problem.
My response would be the same if the father suddenly wanted to pull him out of the public school system and transfer him to parochial. Unless the child is having problems, why mess with something that's working?
Before I read Joy's response, I was going to say, "ask the kid". Now I think Joy may be on the right track (don't put the child between a rock and a hard place). However, I do think it's important to listen for clues in what he does (or doesn't) since it will be his life which will be affected.
Bottom line for me - to use a child as the rope in a tug of way between battling parents serves the interests of no one; especially the child.
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1-07-2008 @ 4:56PM
Ann Adams said...Why do I always notice my mistakes after they're printed?
"However, I do think it's important to listen for clues in what he does (or doesn't) SAY since it will be his life which will be affected.
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1-07-2008 @ 8:55PM
Shay said...I just had to add that Muslims don't worship Mohammad, they worship Allah. Mohammad is revered as the last prophet of God, but he is not worshiped.
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1-07-2008 @ 10:16PM
SKL said...I agree with the other posters who said: (a) if the child has been going to Catholic school in the past, it strains credibility for the father to now say he has a problem with it; and (b) an eighth-grader (presumably 13 or 14 years old) is not old enough to make the decision for himself; although I do think it would be appropriate for the judge to hear the pros and cons that the child sees with respect to staying at the Catholic school.
I will add that I have a number of friends who are not, and never have been, Christian, but completed their entire education in Catholic schools. It is very easy to tell an eighth-grader that your views differ from those of the associated church and why. It is good for the child to nonetheless learn about the religion, since there are more Catholics than any other religion in this country and the vast majority of Americans are Christian. It would be a significant disadvantage to be ignorant of Catholic / Christian teachings, whether you agree with them or not.
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1-08-2008 @ 8:12AM
lisa said...joy makes perfect sense...it seems like a case of sour grapes...or in this case maybe a bitter divorce which can more than just sour the grapes....lol...do what is best for the kiddo....he is the only one that matters right now...he needs stability and he needs not to have to choose between parents...divorce is hellish anyway on kids but to make him change schools is ludicrious....
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