Getting dumped by the Nanny

Filed under: Just For Moms, Toddlers Preschoolers

Nolan's caretaker has been supremely quiet lately, arriving a little late every morning with puffy eyes, a red nose, and her spiral ringlets in a still-wet ponytail underneath a haphazard hat. I don't want to pry, or worse yet, offer unwanted advice, because I am perhaps the least likely qualified person to ever give relationship even to an elderly raccoon. But I do know this: she has broken up with her boyfriend, she is young and has so much time, she has moved out of her home and has her own place for the first time. She is 23.

She's been hinting lately that she'd like to bring on another child to look after, bring in a little more income. Excellent, I exclaimed, and silently thought: Nolan will have a playmate and I won't live in perpetual fear of losing you because you can't live on what I pay you.

I don't under pay the nanny, by any stretch, but it would still be supremely difficult to rent an apartment and buy food on a regular basis with what I pay her monthly. And I really can't afford to pay her a penny more, unless Nolan and I decided not to eat ourselves.

Yesterday, a large retail chain called me for a reference for the Nanny, who is apparently looking for work there, and had provided my name as a reference, without mentioning it to me -- likely because she was distracted by the drama of her own recent woes.

"Oh," I said, my throat constricting,"Well, yes, I cannot say anything bad about her -- she is amazing with my son and is very reliable and caring. I just -- didn't know she was looking for full time work. Oh."

So, I feel now like I have found out through a friend that my Nanny plans to dump me, and I'm not sure what to do. Nolan adores her and I do too. She has a heart of gold and loves to take him swimming and skating and to the aquarium. We'd both be lost without her, and I can't imagine transitioning to another Nanny. We've had enough change in the last year, neither Nolan nor I want the status quo to move a single inch.

What would you do if you thought you were going to get dumped by your Nanny?

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.