Janet Jackson "allergic to marriage"
Categories: Places to go, Medical conditions
Janet Jackson has been happily unmarried to boyfriend Jermaine Dupri since 2002. And despite pressure from family and friends to tie the knot and make some babies, the pop star says she's not interested in walking down the aisle. "If it's [meant] to happen, it'll happen," she says. "I like where we are, and I'm happy where I am. I've done it twice before. I'm afraid I might be a jinx. I might be allergic to marriage."
And while the 41-year-old says she and Dupri both want kids some day, now is not the time. "I've got to get a little more kid out of me first before I move on and be childish with my child." But what about that biological clock? Let it tick, she says. "I get so much pressure .. even my mother mentioned something to me the other day," she says. "But now you can have your eggs frozen and there are all sorts of things you can do. I've still got time so I think I'm okay."
She's right, of course. There are all sorts of things 'older' women can do to help with conception later on in life. But if I were her and knew that I wanted children someday, I don't think I would feel comfortable waiting much longer. What about you? Did you or would you deliberately put off having children to the point where you knew that it was likely you would need some medical intervention in order to get pregnant?
And while the 41-year-old says she and Dupri both want kids some day, now is not the time. "I've got to get a little more kid out of me first before I move on and be childish with my child." But what about that biological clock? Let it tick, she says. "I get so much pressure .. even my mother mentioned something to me the other day," she says. "But now you can have your eggs frozen and there are all sorts of things you can do. I've still got time so I think I'm okay."
She's right, of course. There are all sorts of things 'older' women can do to help with conception later on in life. But if I were her and knew that I wanted children someday, I don't think I would feel comfortable waiting much longer. What about you? Did you or would you deliberately put off having children to the point where you knew that it was likely you would need some medical intervention in order to get pregnant?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 5)
bremarie03 2-13-2008 @ 10:33PM
Well, I'm 29, and had my third (and last) child 5 months ago. So I obviously wasn't comfortable waiting.
It kind of breaks my heart that some people don't know any better when it comes to fertility. They think, "If I can't get pregnant, I'll just get IVF!". They don't realize that IVF doesn't always equal baby in the end. Not even most of the time. I don't know exact numbers so I can't give any, but your odds get worse as you get older. Especially if you want to use your own eggs. The Hollywood actresses that have babies when they're 45? Dollars to donuts they're using donor eggs.
I think most of the population is undereducated and miseducated when it comes to fertility.
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bellatrue 2-17-2008 @ 1:17PM
Not necessarily true... I had my first at 27, the next at 34, and the last two at 42 and 45 respectively. No problems, boring pgs, healthy, beautiful babies, yada yada. My ob said the reason MOST women don't conceive in their 40's is that they don't TRY, lol! In our society, it has been "2 and through at 32" - thamk GOD that isn't the case anymore. I come from a LONG line of good Irish Catholic stock, and we BREED, lolol! Mom had me at 43, me old Grandma had my dad at 47....! I realize this isn't rue for ALL, but a good portion CAN do this, and the kids are ok .
Jane 2-16-2008 @ 12:59PM
Can I please remind everyone that there is nothing wrong with adoption? Millions of orphans and foster children in this country and around the world are in need of loving parents. It is so ignorant to just rush and have a child when you're not ready because you're afraid your eggs are too old. It makes no sense for women to be pressured to have kids they don't really want. It's not like you're buying something that you can return if you decide you no longer want it. Wait until you're ready, stop with this biological clock crap, and realize you CAN be a parent WHEN you want.
bremarie03 2-16-2008 @ 1:30PM
I don't know why you responded to me with this. I have nothing against adoption. I said nothing about having kids if you're not ready. I said nothing about having kids you don't want. I was addressing the misinformation about fertility that is so common. Yes, adoption is a valid choice if you want to be a parent. Having children with donor eggs and/or a surrogate is a valid choice if you want to be a parent. But having children that share your genes is also a valid choice, and if that is your choice, then you can't say "stop with this biological clock crap", because it just doesn't work that way. I repeat, if having biological children is your choice, time does matter. People, women especially, have limited time to reproduce. We may not like it, but that's the way it is.
moppityshoe 2-14-2008 @ 9:01AM
I just think it's refreshing to see a celebrity not rushing into marriage only to get divorced two weeks later.
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heidi Jacobsen 2-17-2008 @ 7:22PM
Exactly! Why rushed just to rush to get divorced again. if the man loves her it will last forever if tis meant to be.
Sharon 2-16-2008 @ 7:00AM
I was 29 with the first, that was okay. I was 32 with the second. Still okay.
I was 39 with the third and that was not good. I've inherited many health problems from ancestors. They started to kick in right after this one was born. I was not able to be as good a parent with the last one.
Definitely can't recommend it for everyone.
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Sharon 2-16-2008 @ 7:01AM
Another thing. The eggs get older too. This third child has a multitude of health problems.
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Jane 2-16-2008 @ 12:43PM
The health problems of your child most likely have nothing to do with the age of the eggs, considering that it's what's in their DNA that matters, and their DNA is a combo of both you and the baby's father. Genetics is extremely complicated. Besides, 39 isn't even that old. And you have to remember there are 22 year old mothers that give birth to very sick children everyday.
dolores 2-16-2008 @ 7:47AM
43 years old and celebrating my first baby shower today! People do not realize how difficult it is to get pregnant as you get older, even with IVF. It took me 4 years and 2 miscarriages. Now I'm in for the home stretch and extremely happy!
I would tell people in their early 30's to seriously consider NOT waiting! YOU CANNOT FREEZE YOUR EGGS ALONE, you can only freeze sperm and FERTILIZED (embryo) EGGS.
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Alf E Newbie 2-16-2008 @ 8:17AM
What? Me worry?
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tom canavan 2-16-2008 @ 8:19AM
Get real. If you are a man I urge you to get your sperm frozen and get a vasectomy so some woman that has no interest in you as a mate and only wants children for her own selfish reasons and to use you as a bank account can't do it. Take the power away from lying women and control your own life. Take the upper hand. If a woman wants children from you make her prove it by making her do whatever you want before you agree to pay for the kid forever and lose your testicles in the process. At least this way you can make a sober decision that will ruin your life because of one drunkien night of fun.
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Jane 2-16-2008 @ 12:48PM
You have nothing to worry about, because no woman with a brain would want to have your child.
stacey 2-16-2008 @ 8:35AM
Being that Janet is rich and with a rich man, I don't think it's much of an issue about her waiting to have children. I mean, she can afford the best doctors and health care, she can afford a nanny and nurses to take care of the child when it's born, she can afford the plastic surgeon to fix her body after the pregnancy, I mean, there isn't much she can't do. Even if her body gets too old, she could freeze her eggs now and get a surrogate for when she decides to be a mom. If all that fails, she can also adopt. She has a world of opportunities at her disposal that the average person can't, and get real, not many celebrities actually raise their own children, their hired help does. By the time I'm her age, I'll be looking forward to my kids getting married and having my grandchildren, which is the way I prefer it to be, but that doesn't mean it's right for everyone.
-mom of 2 by the age of 23 and am not planning on any more babies until my grandkids come along.
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Peachesfor2 2-16-2008 @ 8:59AM
I had my son when I was 40 years old. There's nothing wrong with waiting until you're ready!!!! My son is a healthy active child
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media wiz 2-16-2008 @ 9:01AM
That is such crap Vicky. There are plenty of women who had abortions and have more than one grown healthy child. There are women who didn't marry until after 40 who have at least two healthy, beautiful children. There are women who never had abortions who contracted breast cancer. As for Janet Jackson...she's wealthy and in a position to do whatever she pleases without being beset by potential legal complications from a failed marriage.
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Maria 2-16-2008 @ 9:44AM
Ladies, if you are married and want a child, I recommend you to have them at a younger age. My name is Maria, I'm 41, I met the love of my life on a Catholic Singles website, and we were married on June 16th 2007. We both really, REALLY want children. We have been trying since June, but no luck. I suffer from ovarian cysts and had two. The doctor recommend surgery to drain them and told me he might have to remove the ovaries as well. I was very upset about that, but kept praying asking God to please save my ovaries. Well, I just had the major stomach surgery last Tuesday Feb. 12th, both cysts were drained, and thanks to God the ovaries were saved! Unfortanately I was diagnosed with severe endometriosis, adhesians (everything sticking together due to the endometriosis), and possible infertility. So now while I'm healing I'm trying to cope with the fact we might never be able to have children. However with God anything is possible and I refuse to give up hope. I'm just going to continue praying and trusting in God. We can still always adopt or have foster children (No birth control, IVF, and surrogate mother is NOT an option for us. I refuse to do anything that will offend God or cause me to lose my soul. Also, birth control really messes you up, has a lot of chemicals, and can cause cancer.).
If you are in your forties, were able to get pregnant, or if you have endometriosis and were able to get pregnant, I would really LOVE to hear from you!
May God Bless us all.
Love,
Maria
marialehan4608@aol.com
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Mary 2-17-2008 @ 5:35PM
I had endometreosis for years .I have been blessed with 2 children one is 14 the other is 11. I was lucky or blessed as the case maybe. I have a cousin that had it for years and she had been told she couldn't have children either. But God can do anything. She had 2 girls 3 years apart andthey are grown now,so don't give up and keep trusting God all things are possible for those who trust him.
Ellie 2-16-2008 @ 9:47AM
It is probably just as well that she not add any more weird Jackson genes to the gene pool.
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yourpalerin 2-16-2008 @ 9:49AM
Dear author: shut it. MYODB.
Your pal,
Erin
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