TV as the babysitter: part 2

I found both posts well-stated.

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I think a big reason for both the increase in the use of indoor electronics (not TV per se - lots of us sat in front of it for hours each day 40 years ago) and the lack of outdoor-type culture is that people are afraid / unmotivated to let their kids go outside and play in the neighborhood. Now, to me, that's ten times more sad than seeing kids staring at the boob toob. Yet parents who allow outdoor free play are looked down on much more nowadays than those who allow daily TV. This is partly about safety, but safety doesn't really explain all of it. It's just another example of parents judging other parents for making different choices.

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I think a big reason for both the increase in the use of indoor electronics (not TV per se - lots of us sat in front of it for hours each day 40 years ago) and the lack of outdoor-type culture is that people are afraid / unmotivated to let their kids go outside and play in the neighborhood. Now, to me, that's ten times more sad than seeing kids staring at the boob toob. Yet parents who allow outdoor free play are looked down on much more nowadays than those who allow daily TV. This is partly about safety, but safety doesn't really explain all of it. It's just another example of parents judging other parents for making different choices.

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I think a big reason for both the increase in the use of indoor electronics (not TV per se - lots of us sat in front of it for hours each day 40 years ago) and the lack of outdoor-type culture is that people are afraid / unmotivated to let their kids go outside and play in the neighborhood. Now, to me, that's ten times more sad than seeing kids staring at the boob toob. Yet parents who allow outdoor free play are looked down on much more nowadays than those who allow daily TV. This is partly about safety, but safety doesn't really explain all of it. It's just another example of parents judging other parents for making different choices.

Not that hopscotch and jump rope are the be all and end all, but it's sad that kids don't seem to play anything of that nature today, to my knowledge. At least since I have two daughters close in age I can teach them to play these games, even if nobody else in the neighborhood knows them.

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I agree with part 1, and part 2.

My wife and I have twin boys, one year old. They don't watch TV now, and we intend on strictly limiting their exposure when they get older.
Rather than rely on the TV as a babysitter for a few minutes of downtime, we have a completely enclosed playpen with a large selection of toys. This allows them to play in a big enough area where we we know they are safe and can't come to harms way.
We originated from the UK (BBC = no adverts), and the TV here was so mind-jarringly painful we found it physically hard to watch and took us a few weeks to get acclimatized.
I can only imagine the ADD it is causing to children.

At the end of the day, to each their own. We can only do what we think is right for our own children.

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As someone who was very offended by your first post I greatly appreciate you writing this and explaining what you meant more clearly and in a less judgemental way, even if I still don't entirely agree with you.

As for kids not knowing how to play hopscotch or jump rope, these are games that have to be taught. Even kids who never watch tv aren't going to magically know how to do these things if they are never shown these games. I am not sure that tv watching has anything to do with that particular example.

Also, to Mark, are you basically saying that you pen your kids up in a big cage because you prefer that to letting them view American tv? Truly, to each their own.

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Unfortunately, you chose to write your article in a way that came off very judgmental and even a bit hostile. I even found this follow up some what apologizing but at the same time making jabs at parents who do things differently than you. I think you could have made the same points with a much better delivery. I agree that there is too much tv time in most households. This is probably due in part to more children's programming being available 24/7. But I think the social dynamics of most homes have changed as well. But I also think that there could be much worse things going on in a household, if said tv viewing is appropriate. I have very fond memories of spending evenings watching tv with my parents. I don't think it has handicapped or dumbed me down in anyway.

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My 5 year old son knows about playing Hopscotch BECAUSE he watched a TV program where children were playing it. He has also heard jump rope rhymes on TV.

All the neighbors on our block seem to have boys, most of them are much older than my son, most of them are also mostly Spanish speaking. He has learned some Spanish from them but he has also learned some from TV programs. (That sounds like he watches TV a lot, which he doesn't, it just happens that his favorite shows are bi-lingual)

I don't have to limit his TV watching because he will watch a few minutes, sometimes even a whole show (TV doesn't hold his attention like other things do), but then he wants to go play, or draw, or listen to his new CD and dance. His favorite games involve numbers and/or letters, pretending to be Daddy while I'm the baby, or he will be my sweet little kitten, and he loves his trains, having pretend conversations with them.

TV hasn't hurt him, in fact I think it's helped him. I don't, however, use the TV as a babysitter, he isn't interested enough in the programs for me to be able to do anything longer than 5 minutes before he would come and look for me.

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My girls are 8 and 10. They watched more t.v. when they were younger, Blues Clues and Sesame Street type shows, than they watch now. Rarely would they sit and watch the entire show. It must not have hurt them too much, because their I.Q.s are in the high 130's.
I did notice that they were watching a bit more than usual lately after we got a bigger set in the living room, so I keep it turned off. If they go upstairs to watch, they usually find something more interesting to do instead.

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I appreciate your attempts to rectify the situation.

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Bear in mind also that parents of infants and very young children are often oversensitive and quick to see rebuke where none is intended. I was, most of you are, and parents will be world without end, amen.

We're insecure enough about the choices we make, and when that choice is debated and many sides are shown - most of them good - we tend to question ourselves and the choices we've made, and because those choices are about our children's welfare, we are sometimes far too quick to take offense when someone disagrees or simply has a different point of view, instead of reading/listening calmly and adding other points of view to our list of "think-abouts."

When our children are older, we usually look back at ourselves and laugh, and wonder how we could ever have taken such a trivial thing so seriously.

By the way, my children watched Mr. Rogers, Sesame Street, and Electric Company, and then it was 8:00 a.m. and the tv was turned off until the next morning's asscrack of dawn.

Me? I watched MASH at 3 a.m. And now I watch MASH and Scrubs on dvd. Both of my kids have been grown and on their own for years now, and while my daughter used to host a Buffy party every Tuesday night, since that show's been gone neither of my kids watches TV at all, except to rent a movie.

I showered and did laundry in our dank black hole of a cellar at night, when they were in bed.

I also used a large playpen if I had to run outside for any reason during the day. A large cage for a trapped child? Darn right. I valued their safety far more than I valued anybody else's opinion.

Do I care if YOU watch tv, or can't function with background noise coming from your tv, or let your kids watch hour after hour of tv? Nope. Although, if your child told me in the classroom that he/she was staying up till midnight every night watching Jerry Springer with Mommy, I'd probably call CPS on you.

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I don't think it is a matter of forgetting. Many schools have banned skipping ropes as they are a choking hazzard. My dd's school also banned tag because the children might fall and hurt themselves. There are no hopscotch boards and the kids couldn't use chalk to draw them because it might stain the pavement.
So my dd who is now 16 was not doing the activities that your kids would have picked up from see them in the playground. that is ow we all learned those rhymes and games, not from our parents but from the older kids at school.

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