Kate Beckinsale on nature vs. nurture
Categories: Newborns, Babies, Toddlers, Preschoolers, Teens & tweens, Development, Celeb Parenting, Environment, That's Entertainment
"I've come to the realization," one of my friends recently told me about her children, "that what I do matters very little in who they become." In the nature vs. nurture debate, she believes that nearly all personality traits are present at birth, an attitude she shares with celeb mom Kate Beckinsale.
Beckinsale recently said in an interview with Mean magazine that she believes that babies are born "80% baked," but that environmental influences are important as well.
Before I was a mom, I believed that nurture was the more important component. But raising children teaches you that personality is something that's part of a person's genetic makeup. I still think there's a delicate balance between the two, however, and that environment plays a big role in who we become. What about you? Where do you stand on the nature vs. nurture debate?
Beckinsale recently said in an interview with Mean magazine that she believes that babies are born "80% baked," but that environmental influences are important as well.
Before I was a mom, I believed that nurture was the more important component. But raising children teaches you that personality is something that's part of a person's genetic makeup. I still think there's a delicate balance between the two, however, and that environment plays a big role in who we become. What about you? Where do you stand on the nature vs. nurture debate?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Mel 3-14-2008 @ 3:18PM
I believe that "nature" determines who we become, and "nurture" determines how we get there. In other words, you cannot change a child's destiny, but you can change his path to that destiny.
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Nicola 3-14-2008 @ 3:18PM
Prior to birthing the stubborn little beasty who is my son, I was 80% nurture. Now, I still believe that the child's environment can have a big effect on who they become, but largely when "things go wrong". Yes, that can screw a person up. However, under ideal circumstances (ie no major childhood traumas), I now believe that nature plays a much bigger role than originally anticipated. Just from my own personal experience. You see, my son IS my father. My personality and my husband's personalities are very similar, very quiet and mild mannered. My father was a boy maniac, the school trouble maker, his mother's worst nightmare. And in both personality and looks, everybody says that my son IS my father. I didn't create that intentionally, but its what nature handed us...
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AngelaFay 3-14-2008 @ 3:30PM
Well. My twin sister and I are a prime example of nature having the lead over nurture. We were raised by the same mom, in the same environment AT the same point in her life and we couldn't be more different. And not in cute little purple vs. pink ways...I mean values, ethics, academics, etc. Now that I have two little ones I'm curious to see what traits they'll share. Sure, there's a lot to be said about nurture - but in my experience, nature has the winning hand.
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Ethel 3-14-2008 @ 3:31PM
Well, I do believe nurture might also include the epigenetics that you might hand down from you own health, nutrition, and what you were taking while pregnant. So for me it depends on what you mean by nature and nurture. We are more then our genes, in that we moms and dads before becoming parents can influence how those genes are muted, turned on, or turned off in our gametes - and the fetal exposure to chemicals both biological and introduced artificially - has a large impact on who we are too.
So, I don't know. As a biochemist I know that we can do a lot to effect how our genes are expressed by what are exposed to or expose ourselves too. But certainly our personality is pretty much fixed before birth, and nurturing properly helps us be who we are in a good way.
Sigh, I should say in an evolutionalist's terms, genes would are our nature and the environment in total is nurture. So the answer is straightforward in that context. At least to myself I suppose.
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Ethel 3-14-2008 @ 7:06PM
I would also agree that after having 3 kids spaced less than a year apart, my beliefs have changed. I used to be a nurture buff but now I see that my kids came "out of the box" with the personalities they have at 4, 5, and 6. Their teachers have even tried to compliment us as parents saying things like "you've done some good modeling". I wish that were the case. I have however read some really good books and they mostly agree that our childrens' environment teaches them to use what they've got to the best of their abilities.
My oldest will always be very empathetic and concerned with others feelings and thoughts. This is great when someone is hurt, scared or sad. This is not great when her "best friend" says "if you don't do what I do, I won't be your friend". It is our job to establish good reasons for not doing the wrong thing in this situation that will outweigh her need to "fit in".
My middle child will always march to the beat of his own drummer. This is great in social "peer pressure" type situations and less encouraging when trying to get him to stop doing . . . . insert objectionable behavior of your choice. Once again, dad and I swoop in with the moral fiber needed to mold our headstrong son into a socially capable adult.
Our youngest is so shy that she literally hides behind me if one of my friends speaks to her in the grocery store. Once again her teachers commend us for raising such a good listener. Also, I never have to worry about her talking to or walking away with a "strange" adult. However, I've never gotten her to smile in any professional picture ever in 4 years. Someday I'm sure we will find a way to convince her that the world will not end if she shows her true personality outside the comfort zone of her own home and family. Really, we will.
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SKL 3-15-2008 @ 3:14AM
Nature wins, and thank goodness, because this is what creates diversity within a family, which is a great thing. My daughters are as different as night and day. They came with very definite personalities! And that is the reason they adore each other so much. And it's also why I can tend to each of their needs, because they don't have the same emotional needs and thus don't have a lot of jealousy. And each of us learns from each other every day - not only about ourselves, but about the possibilities in all people - thus making us more tolerant and adaptable in the "big bad world."
Of course nurture is big too. But it's more like building a fence around a fertile field where horses graze, not like riding a horse with reins and a saddle. Kids learn what's acceptable and why; and how to manage their emotions and appetities to keep within the acceptable ranges of behavior. And of course a child must be exposed to the media to express her natural talents. If I have no musical instruments around and don't listen to music, my kid could be Mozart reincarnated and never find out. Similarly with academics - my 14mo is learning her letters because I'm exposing her to them AND she's very interested. Her 17mo sister isn't as interested, though she's picking things up just by hearing them. 14mo literally "studies" her books while 17mo alternates between looking at them and biting them and putting them back on the shelf (she's the neat freak). But if we didn't have books around or didn't pay much attention to them, not only would there be a delay in acquiring certain knowledge, but my 14mo's sensitive learning period for early literacy might have been missed entirely.
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the goddess anna 3-15-2008 @ 9:04AM
I have always believed that nature was a much stronger influence than nature. I look to my own upbringing for the best example. I was raised by my mother, and she encouraged me to play sports, be good at boy things (I was pushed into science and math), never wear dresses/skirts, my hair was always short... she wanted me to be a tomboy. I was never supposed to rely on a man for anything. And chort forbid I ever mentioned that I thought a girl was pretty - my mom has admitted she wished that I had been born a lesbian too. (She was upset with me when I got married, she thought I was doing it just to give my daughter a father.)
In short, I was raised to be just like my mother, but nature proved more resilient. I'm very much a girlie-girl, and although I'm good at math and science, I'm much better at languages. I do crafts, wear pink, and I married a man that does the household repairs for me. It's who I am.
Slightly off-topic, this is why I'm against parents who try to force their kids to play with gender-nonspecific toys, who freak out if their little boys don't like pink or their little girls want to be a fairy princess. Yeah, my youngest likes to wear an old chemise of mine, but he wears it playing with trains. My daughter may like to play with trucks, but they're 'families.' I like what SKL said about nurture being a fence - it's like a light framework, but nature should be given the ability to go its course.
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Heather 4-15-2008 @ 9:18PM
AngelaFay,
I am sorry to tell you that your comment proved to be evidence of the opposing viewpoint. You see, you and your sister, if identical twins, have the exact same genes. The whole nature side of the argument is in fact your genetic makeup, the traits which were passed from your parents to you, including your appearance. If you and your sister have turned out completely different, it means that somewhere down the line, at a point in both of your lives, you may have met someone, had an important enlightening or traumatic event, or just went separate ways. The nurture side of the argument is not just your home environment. You both may have been raised by your mom, but you could have had different peers, teachers, etc. If, however, you are fraternal twins, your situation would be as useless to the nature vs. nurture debate as my sister and my situation. I understand your point and think it's a good one, though. The only thing I am certain about my future children is what they will look like.
I believe both nature and nurture influence the way each individual turns out. I've been researching this for a really long time and I've come to the conclusion that your genes shape your perspective on environment and in return your environment shapes your personality, if that makes any sense.
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