I know why they ban tag
Categories: Kids 5-7, Just for dads, Fun & activities, Places to go, Health & safety, Toys & games
Since I began writing for ParentDish, there have been a number of reports of schools that have banned the game of tag in the schoolyard. In fact, Jared's school does not allow any chase-type games. A lot of people don't get this -- after all, kids have been playing tag and other, similar games probably since the beginning of time. I have to admit that, until yesterday, I, too, was in the let-them-have-their-fun camp.Until yesterday. We were at the local playground and the kids wanted to play the Pirate Game. Basically, I -- the tickle pirate -- run around chasing them saying things like "I'll get ya, ya scurvy dogs!", "Yer goin' ta walk the plank, ya scallywags!", and, of course, "Arrrrr!" The kids squeal with laughter and run away.
I chase them over, under, and through the play structure, sort of my own watered down version of parkour. Jared and Sara were paused by a spiral slide -- Sara on the slide and Jared next to it -- when I came up from the side. Laughing and screaming, Jared took off at full speed, moving sideways and looking back at me, right straight into a metal pole. It was a real Wile E. Coyote moment.
He went down like a lead balloon. I ran over just as the howling started. A whole lot of hugging, some kisses, and a bit of rest on the bench and he was okay, but man it must have hurt. That pole rang loud enough that I'm surprised Rachel didn't hear it at home. Luckily, the only reminders of the incident are a bit of a bruise on his ear, and a whole lot of guilty feelings on my part.
So, I understand while schools would ban chase games like tag. We won't be playing the Pirate Game anymore. At least, not for a long while, anyway.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Molly 3-23-2008 @ 6:41PM
Roger, I'm usually a big fan of your posts because I agree with most of what you have to say. But, this one just doesn't make sense. If you follow this logic, you should ban running as well. Sure, Jared was looking back at you, but that could have happened whether you were chasing him or not. Kids would probably be a lot safer if we never let them ride bikes or rollerblade or run around like little pirates, but that's no way to live!
I'm sure you feel bad that Jared got hurt, but that doesn't mean that the game should never be played again. Especially for something that sounds like so much fun for the whole family. Next time, just play it in an area a little more open and free from pesky metal poles!
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isisaquaria 3-23-2008 @ 7:40PM
If I stopped everything that has ever hurt someone, I wouldn't do anything nor would you...
Swimming
Horseback Riding
Cooking
Driving
The point is while I agree that maybe a less crowded local would better why stop altogether? Extreme case reaction IMO
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Sherry 3-23-2008 @ 8:28PM
My daughter is very clumsy and trips and falls all the time. Maybe we should ban walking. My son can't sit still and frequently falls out of chairs. Shall we ban sitting? Both fell out of bed a couple of times so no more sleeping.
I am all for keeping kids safe and protected, but you can't protect them from ever getting hurt. These types of games and the occasional injuries they receive are how they learn the limitations of their own bodies.
Shall we just wrap them all up in bubble wrap with helmets and knee and elbow pads?
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Clarissa 3-23-2008 @ 8:42PM
Kids get hurt, it can't be stopped. My own child went over the handle bars of her bike 3 weeks ago and broke her wrist. It happens. It is much better to teach a kid that gets hurt to get up dust off, pick up what's left of their cool points and keep on going. To teach them to quit after an injury is to teach them to give up after every disappointment. My daughter can't wait to get her cast off so she can get back on her bike and ride and to go skating again. I have taught her to no let upsets get her down.
I understand as parents that we want to keep them from getting hurt, but sometimes, it's better for them to fall down. In doing so they learn to be more careful. They learn that doing certain things will get them hurt and they learn the limits of their bodies.
Kids are tougher than you think. You have to learn to let your kid be a kid and understand that in doing so he is going to sometimes get hurt. Next time he playes pirate or any time he is running, I bet he will be more careful about watching where he is running.
Lessons learned and they don't come cheap.
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ninainindia 3-23-2008 @ 9:04PM
This sounds like an over reaction. He wasn't seriously hurt and playing tag is not a dangerous game.
I would never put my child in a school that bans normal games like tag. You never know what they will ban next.
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WonderMom 3-23-2008 @ 10:42PM
Wow, I hit the comment button expecting to see a bunch of supporters and figured I'd be the lone wolf. Glad I"m not. I agree with everyone. I bet you a dollar he will watch where he is going next time you play (I hope you won't stop playing this game!) And he will have great memories of YOU palying with HIM.
Just today I was complaining about my BIL who is always on his girls for squeeling, laughing etc. and just being kids, he squelches their fun. Little girl#2 made some drums in the "playroom" upstairs, banged them once and he yelled from downstairs to stop. We were at my MIL's 5000sq home for gripes sake! Must be real fun at their house.
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Anita 3-23-2008 @ 10:49PM
I agree with the above posters. My son was dancing in our kitchen last Saturday and fell, scraping his head against the corner of a chair on the way down. He required a trip to the ER and 3 staples in his head but I still don't plan to ban dancing in my house.
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Summer 3-23-2008 @ 10:50PM
Roger,
I have to ditto the other reasonable voices here...
You wrote this post with the too-fresh memory of your child in pain... I can totally sympathized, but I highly doubt you would write this same post a year, or even a month, from now.
My husband was playing with my oldest daughter in our living room when she was four. She suddenly took off running and rounded the corner into our office. She tripped and bashed her mouth into the metal bar on our futon sofa. There was blood everywhere and her two, top teeth were pushed up into her gums. An emergency trip to the dentist was followed by more than 2 weeks of horrible bruising and swelling. That night, my husband and I lay in bed crying, we were so upset about what happened.
But you know what?
That same daughter is now almost 15 and she has a beautiful smile and she plays basketball and softball and she's on swim team.
There are so many things that CAN hurt them, but we can't protect them from everything and I would hate to imagine a childhood with no tag, no running, no skinned knees, owwies or boo-boos... that's just part of being a kid.
It kind of reminds me of that scene in Finding Nemo when Dory says to Marlin, "That's a funny thing to say; I mean, if you never let anything happen to him, then nothing would EVER happen to him."
This is life.
Don't make your children afraid to live it.
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Meagan 3-24-2008 @ 12:15AM
Ok yeah... my GUESS is Roger didn't mean literally ban tag. I read this as rueful guilt after playing and accidentally getting his kid hurt rather than an actual advocation for a tag ban.
I also UNDERSTAND why some schools/places/people/parks ban tag... that doesn't mean I agree with it. As everyone's pointed out you can't keep kids from ever getting hurt.
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pbhj 3-24-2008 @ 12:21AM
>>> As everyone's pointed out you can't keep kids from ever getting hurt.
Presumably though a school that allows tag is going to be sued by some money grabbing parent because their child fell over.
And that is why ...
Totally agree though, we learn quickly by our mistakes especially if they involve running in to immovable objects!
eugene 3-24-2008 @ 12:22AM
I agree with the other posters. Life is full of dangers and wrapping kids up in a foam suit and trying to shield from anything that might hurt them is not doing them a favor. Personally, I think it will make them timid and insecure. Part of growing up is learning how to get back up after you take the fall.
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Crystal 3-24-2008 @ 8:28AM
It used to be ok for kids to fall and get bumps and bruises. It was part of growing up and part of having as much fun as possible.
We tell our kids not to watch too much TV, or not to play too many video games. They should go outside...
AND DO WHAT?? Stand there.
C'mon. Kids will be kids, and should be ALLOWED and ENCOURAGED to be kids.
Let this experience be a learning lesson...LOOK WHERE YOU ARE RUNNING.
Go back out there and RUN SOME MORE!!!!!
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Sandyone 3-25-2008 @ 8:18AM
Heh, heh...about 9 years ago, I had my preschool age kids at a local school playground. It was after school hours and the after-care kids came out to play. The lady in charge was yelling at the kids, "NO RUNNING!!!"
Duh. Ok, kids...we're going outside to blow off some steam and take in some fresh air. But don't you move too much!
Gabby 3-24-2008 @ 12:36PM
Your emotional pain is worse than his physical pain, which is the real reason you now are leery of chasing him. If you asked your kid if he still wanted to play the Pirate game, I'm sure he'd say he does. And what do you want your child to remember when he grows up - you constantly telling him to be careful and not to get hurt, or do you want him to remember you playing with him? Anyway, good luck managing all that guilt!
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Tom 3-24-2008 @ 1:33PM
ban PI lawyers, not tag.
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Summer 3-24-2008 @ 1:48PM
ROFLMBO @ Tom!!!
That's great!
I think that should be a bumper sticker!
LOL
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Meagan 3-24-2008 @ 5:33PM
You're right, that would make an awesome bumper sticker.
rubialala 3-24-2008 @ 3:59PM
This is a tough one. Of course accidents are going to happen. I would think the schools are banning tag to avoid kids getting too excited and pushing each other down instead of tagging each other. I'll still play tag or chase with my kid.
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allison 4-19-2008 @ 9:05PM
omg roger,really that didn't make any sense at all dear...your son had gotten hurt because he wasn't paying attention...i cannot tell you how many times my children gotten hurt or banged thier heads on the playground or at home on the coffee table,c'mon...he got hurt he will get over it thats what the kisses and hugs were for lol...betcha he will wanna play it agian too,they don't care if they get banged up a bit all kid's do...when i went to school i played tag i can't see the world without it,but there were also lunch moms or whatever the ladies were called that went out in the school yards with us,they had whistles too lol...all schools should have them...tag is tag,and there are gonna be bad kids and good kids whatever school they go to...let it be...i thought you were gonna tell some horrible tale of someone dying over the game of tag or something,but running into a pole c'mon all kids do that,sh*t i still do hahahahaha.....
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Wendy 4-19-2008 @ 10:23PM
That's too bad that you would let one accident stop you from playing a game that obviously was great fun for your kids. Accidents happen!!! The kid is okay. Thanks for the fun idea of a game though. I'll be playing that one with my kids!
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