Letter to childless diners by a blogging mom
Categories: Eating & nutrition, Playground bureau
Have you ever brought a well-behaved child to a restaurant and been treated like a leper for no discernible reason by other patrons?
Lindsay of Suburban Turmoil has. Instead of responding in kind with glares and audible under-breath naughty words though, she wrote a little letter on her blog addressing the accusatory stares of the childless who ruined her meal.
Dear Fashionable Single Girl ,
I used to be one of you, Fashionable Single Girl, and now that I'm a parent, I'm hyper-aware of your kind whenever I take my kids out to eat. I actually shush them at every outburst. I pick up the food and napkins they drop on the floor. I don't take them to restaurants where I don't think they'd be welcome and on the rare night that they can't seem to control themselves (which, I'll admit, happened one night at Bosco's back in ought-four), I leave, so that people like you can dine in peace.
You did your level best to ruin my dinner. That's right. I know it's a novel concept that you could ruin the dinner of a mom with four kids, but there you go. I've quietly listened to childless people complain about families at restaurants for too long. Now it's my turn.
Get. Over. It. Not every parent allows his or her child to act like a hellion. Treat those of us who are clearly making an effort with a little respect. Remember that you were a kid once, too (and probably a nasty, screaming, projectile vomiting one at that), and that my kids will be paying your Social Security some day when you're living in that squalid senior citizen high rise because you spent too many of your paychecks on Hermes scarves and Coach bags.
Sing it, sister friend!
I blocked it out, but my husband vividly remembers the time we took our happy, easy-going firstborn to a nice but not super fancy restaurant and were treated as if we'd strapped a pet rat into the booster.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Jen Henry 3-29-2008 @ 8:01PM
We just came back from a restaurant tonight where we were seated NEXT to the kids from hell! We doing everything the letter writer said to try to keep our own two well-behaved, and yet the children at the table next to us were out of control, even going so far as wrestle on the floor beside our table for fun, doing slapstick comedy to try to make my two year old son laugh by repeatedly slapping each other, throwing their food etc. These kids were older, they looked to be about 8 or 9. Guess what MY kids tried to imitate the rest of meal? Everyone kept looking our direction, and we were so paranoid they were looking at us as the culprit of where all the racket was coming from. Needless to say, I've never found myself in that situation before. When the people finally left, my kids were round right up, and we ended up not able to finish any of our errands and called it a night.
Has anyone ever had that happen to them before?
Jen
http://furoreandfrenzy.com
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Leslie 3-29-2008 @ 10:41PM
We had an experience where we took our then two year-old to a very fancy restaurant. We made certain we called ahead to warn the restaurant and make sure we could get a highchair, made early reservations (this was during the week also), asked to be seated in the noisier part of the restaurant, and brought plenty of distractions (crayons, stickers, etc.). We also knew that our daughter was generally well-behaved in restaurants and mostly would eat quietly as long as food was in front of her.
When we sat down at our table, the older couple next to us scowled and sighed. I was on edge the entire meal, but then, as the couple left a while later, they actually apologized to us! The woman said, "I want to compliment you on your well-behaved daughter. I think she has behaved better than my husband!"
Of course, we had sort of gotten lucky that night, and I don't think I would risk it again now that we have 2 kids - generally I stick to the "no tablecloth, lots of other noisy kids, don't mind lots of food thrown on the floor" types of places.
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Justin 3-30-2008 @ 9:36AM
Hehehe I have to chime in with some funny personal experience.
My situation is a bit odd, in that I normally used to take care of a kid part-time (Not my kid either), and now I have my own two kids (Adopted)...
I used to bring the first kid (Aged from 3-7) to a restaurant and I would be scowled at the second I walked in the door, but by the time I left I would be showered with compliments on the little "Gentleman" I brought to dine with me. I live in a small town so everyone knows everyone and I actually became rather well liked when we went out to the restaurants (All 4 of them in town) because of how well he behaved and how nice he was to everyone. (I was utterly shocked myself at how good he was, it was above and beyond what most over-polite/nice kids are like)
Now... I have my own kids... Things have changed.
Sadly I've had to do the "Over-The-Shoulder-Toss" and walk out a couple times.
I guess that every kid is different... And my dining reputation is over, anyone here smell a nice homecooked meal? :-)
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ammie 3-30-2008 @ 5:02PM
I saw that letter of Lindsey's and identified with it so much. I'm always paranoid about keeping my kids well behaved. I don't want to be the family that is griped about when we go out to eat. Then Thursday night we went out to eat and I blogged our experience here:
http://sleepingmommy.com/2008/03/27/kids-meals-99-cents/
Sometimes we have to do what Lindsey says and just stop worrying about what other people think, when we know we are doing everything we are supposed to and our kids are not out of line--just being kids.
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M4Mommy 3-31-2008 @ 1:30PM
Why is it ok for a child to behave like a snot even at a
""no tablecloth, lots of other noisy kids, don't mind lots of food thrown on the floor" types of places. "" ?
Why not expect the child to behave even at a McDonalds, BK Wendys, Taco Bell, KFC or what ever is around you? Then when you do get to take the child, or children to a "nice" eating establishment they KNOW how to BEHAVE.
I just dont understand the difference. Eating out and learning how to behave in public happens at both places.
Maybe one of you courteous diners with small children can tell me the difference. If you are not too busy letting the children run screaming around your house, apartment, neighborhood, local food store, bank, post office, WalMart(gak) shopping center, hardware store or better yet street.
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heather 3-31-2008 @ 6:11PM
My son usually behaves in resturants as well, but when he sees other kids running around he want's to too.
We were at a bufet awhile ago and there were these horrible children who were disturbing everyone. I finally told them it wasn't a playground and to go sit down.
They left with thier families a few minutes later. On the way out the adults started hooting and hollering : goodbye everyone hope you have a great &*$#^ dinner. and waving the middle finger around.
They were proud thier kids disturbed everyone else. No wonder the kids were so ill behaved. I feel sorry for thier teachers. I can't imagine trying to get my child to be as bratty as possible. What kind of adults will they be. To me that is child abuse.
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