9 year old rides subway alone

Whatever that mom thinks is safe for her child, I have no say in that, none of my business.
My 10 year old knows how to drive (thanks to her grandfather) and I would trust her to stay home alone while I ran to the store. But, considering she was flirted with by a 15 year old at the movie theatre (in my presence) there is no way in hell I would let her take public transportation, which around here is a bus. Maybe it is different with boys. Personally, I'm not allowing a 10 year old with the body of a high schooler go off on her own.

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No matter how ready that nine year old may be, there is always going to be a child predator thats bigger than that child and is plenty able to pick that kid up and take them home with them. I wonder how smug that mother would be if her child ended up like the many many other kids in this world that were allowed to have freedom too early, only to be kidnapped, raped and killed. Children shouldn't be out anywhere ALONE.
Oh and to that person that said the world is safer now than in the nineties... You are insane. This world is so much more dangerous than it was 20 years ago. Kids can't even safely play in thier own backyards.
Do you really want to depend on the kindness of strangers when it comes to your childs safety? I teach my child not to talk to strangers... I thought that was the norm. After seeing all these naive comments, I'm not so sure. My kid is in no way sheltered but she is protected. There is a difference.

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All I can say is, I'd hate to tell you what I did alone when I was nine. Nine is half grown-up! Give kids some credit.

Of course, Mel thinks my parenting style equates to child neglect/abuse, so . . . .

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By the way, speaking of naivete and child molesters. I think some folks need to educate themselves on this topic in order to protect their children better. Most of the time kids are molested, it's not in some far-off place; it's practically (or actually) in their own backyards. Usually done by people who their parents thought (or still think) they could trust. You probably have a couple of friends who have, will, or would do something inappropriate with a child if given the opportunity. It is far too common for anyone to believe otherwise.

If your goal is protecting your child against child molesters, your job is to help them develop confidence and independence so that they can protect THEMSELVES from perverts everywhere, including in and around their own homes. This includes letting them reach out into their world, take on challenges, take calculated risks, and experience some personal accomplishment.

Kudos to this mom; I probably would have done the same thing if my kid were very familiar with the NY subway.

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Incidentally, certain commenters might want to read today's Metro Diary at the NYTimes.

Now, admittedly, the Diary is along the lines of cute kid comments some days, but I do believe the stories tend to be true.

" A European acquaintance whom I was showing around the city on a recent weekday afternoon would not stop commenting about how rude and self-absorbed she thought New Yorkers were.

No sooner had she uttered her latest smear than we heard the wail of an ambulance. There it was, halfway down a side street, trapped behind a single file of a dozen cars or so waiting for the light on Broadway to turn green.

Assessing the situation, a pedestrian walked into the intersection, put down his briefcase and waved the cars through. With his other hand he brought the taxicabs, trucks and buses that were barreling down Broadway to a sudden halt.

Never mind that the lights kept changing. Every driver obeyed this impromptu traffic cop, and not a single horn sounded. The ambulance, now liberated from its midblock trap, roared through the intersection as its panicked, red-faced driver managed a hearty nod in thanks to this good Samaritan.

The man picked up his briefcase, headed for the sidewalk and blended back into the rush-hour crowd. I didn’t hear a peep out of my companion for the rest of her trip regarding the rudeness or selfishness of New Yorkers."

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/07/nyregion/07diary.html?ref=nyregion

Yeah, we're all so apathetic. (I really don't like people insulting my city, can you tell?)

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I rode the subway alone when I was ten. I had to. My father lived in Greenwich Village and my mom lived in Brooklyn and I went to school near her house.

It was terrifying. I got lost several times. Got harassed. Got flashed.

Terrifying.

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My ex and I had huge arguments about our children's ability to travel on their own.

He believed that we should keep them locked in a box until they were 18 and then dump all the responsibility on them at once. (I may be exaggerating his position but that's how his argument felt to me)

When it was clear we couldn't come to an agreement, I went my way and he went his. I started with small trips around the city (Toronto, ~5million in the GTA), and gradually allowed them more freedom as they proved they could handle each trip. As a result by the time they were 10 and 11 they were making the trip between our houses regularly. It required one city bus, one GO transit train and one GO transit bus. We had some missteps, but they always had money with them for a phone call, and there was always a way to reach me if there was a problem. My daughter, when coming from school to meet me downtown on day took an express train instead of one that stopped where she was planning to get off. She was a little scared, but she sure learned to read the schedule more carefully.

Now my kids are 18 and 19, and both of them use public transit to get to school, visit friends and generally get around. Thankfully this has convinced them they don't need to drive in the city. My son's girlfriend by comparison didn't do this. At 18 she rode transit on her own for the first time. As a result she's hesitant and nervous every trip she takes.

Hmm, I'll just think of this as my "I told you so" to my ex :)

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Ok here we go, this is so scarry. I can remember tho when I was that age I was giving fee range to do alot of things. My mother trusted me and I know the fact that she was a single mother that I was giving alot more space then other kids. I was always alot mature for my age. But again it is a touchy subject when there are kids in the discussion. I now myself have a 8 year old, would I allow him to do the same thing in less then one year from now? Absolutely not!! I know my son tho. It is hard to say truly it is. It is just sad that we live in a world now where it is such an issue to let your child go and explore. I damn all of the molesters and people who make it so scarry for all of us parents.

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It does seem a bit scary to allow a 9 year old to travel the NYC subway system alone but if he's begging for the challenge then he should be supported. Forcing a child who is afraid to do such a thing would not be wise. Preparation is important though, when allowing a young man to handle such a grown up deed. Although a metro card, a map and $20 on him is a good start, I would want him to have some form of self protection like mace or a stun device if he were approached. At the very least, he should have a cell phone to call for help if he gets hurt or lost and most cell phones now are able to be tracked if he were abducted. He's a very determined young man and I commend him for wanting to handle travel on his own.

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murray hill is so dangerous. or museum row. complete crime zones. get over it. kids in nyc use public transit all the time. this just went advertised thats all.

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