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Rules when visiting other people's homes
Filed under: Toddlers Preschoolers
So here we all are staying with family for a few days and I fully expected that my 2.5-year-old would act up a little or maybe a lot, being as how his dad is out of town (which is why we're staying with family) and we're away from our home environment and Riley tends to get a little obnoxious around the grandparents anyway. And while he's been pretty good overall so far, he's definitely testing some limits. For instance, he's been using the couches here as a launch pad, despite the fact that he's not allowed to jump on the furniture at home.Riley's grandparents don't really mind certain things that we do: for instance, the couch-jumping. So I'm wondering, when you visit other people's homes, do you enforce the same rules? The couch aerobics isn't really a question for me because hello, ANNOYING, and also dangerous, but I'm questioning things like No Juice Cups Allowed In the Carpet Rooms, which is something we do at home but no one minds it here.
What do you think? Keep rules for the sake of consistency, or allow flexibility in different situations?
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ReaderComments (Page 2 of 2)
4-09-2008 @ 2:18PM
Corey Chernesky said...You need to stay consistent. Otherwise, you'll have a nightmare on your hands when you get home.
Reply
4-09-2008 @ 2:32PM
Ingrid said...Enforce your rules because you have to live with Riley all the rest of the time - and you may already have this figured out, but RE-training him for your home rules is harder after he has tasted the sweet, sweet couch jumping freedom of grandma and grandpa's house.
Reply
4-09-2008 @ 4:09PM
Sabrina said...I'm going to chime in on the "be consistent" side of things. Of course each house is different, and so new rules might apply. (Example, my parents have stairs and we don't, and there's a set of rules for going upstairs). However, watch out for Grandma and Grandpa. My mother follows my rules for my kids really well, doesn't give them junk foods or candy, and doesn't allow them to watch questionable things on TV, or fight with each other. But if I leave them alone with her she's "permissive" about letting them sit on her white couches (I don't allow that because I can't afford to replace them!) and playing rough and being loud, and things I ask them not to do out of respect for another person's house. She says she lets them do these things because they don't bother her, but I don't let them do those same things specifically to teach them to use respect and restraint when you're a guest in someone's house.
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4-09-2008 @ 5:39PM
Bethany said...I think it's a good idea to have specific rules for being at other people's houses. My parents used to have Bible studies at our house when I was growing up and families always knew they could bring their kids along. The problem was that no one would watch them and they would end up running rampant and breaking things. It really bothered me, because they weren't my guests and they were breaking my things. Certain parents hadn't taught their kids that you have to respect other people's belongings and behave while a guest in someone's home.
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4-09-2008 @ 5:54PM
Sybil said...I agree with the "be consistent" previous posters. For me, it has been challenging to be the friend/in-law that people with kids are visiting. When other people's children do not respect your property and the parents do not enforce any rules of proper behavior, it places the host in a very difficult position; especially if someone else's child damages anything in your home. It is not just a service to the kids to enforce consistent rules, it is a service to your hosts who should not have to police your children or face the awkwardness of how to deal with any damage to their belongings.
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4-11-2008 @ 4:05AM
angela said...I say enforce all the time. But not for consistency. Do it so that way when he visits a friend's house in the future he will announce that No Juice Is Allowed In Carpet Rooms and then you look like super mom.
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