Happy to be past the brand-new-baby stage

by Linda Lee (Subscribe to Linda Lee's posts) Apr 11th 2008 10:00AM

I will state for the record that while I loved my boy Dylan from the moment he was born and even many months beforehand when he was only a tiny tadpole-like clump of cells that made me fart both vigorously and relentlessly, I love him in a different sort of way now that he's no longer a crumpled-up, mostly-unresponsive-except-for-the-fussing newborn. It's a much more rewarding sense of love, a feeling that pours out of me when he looks at my face and does that ridiculous leg-marching business, waving his arms wildly and grinning, shaping his mouth into a tiny circle to coo at me.

I love to look at brand-new babies and I suppose there will be a day when I will wish like anything that my giant gallumping boys were miniscule newborns again, but while I'm in the here and now I will just say this: I am so happy that Dylan is 9 weeks old, and not 9 days old. I don't mean to hurry away every precious moment or anything, but oh man were those first weeks hard. I loved him then and I love him now, but I think I will go ahead and admit that I love him more now. More every day.

Comments (10)

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

Kaitlyn 4-11-2008 @ 10:14AM

I always say that the most surprising thing about motherhood has not been how much I love my daughter, but that the love I feel for her continues to grow. Just when I think I am at "love capacity", she does something new and I turn to mush inside and fall mroe in love with her. And yeah, newborns are HARD to take care of! Things are much better once they start to acknowledge your presence :)

Stacie 4-11-2008 @ 10:17AM

I've never understood that whole "don't wish away these precious moments!" sentiment. Well, if you're hating every second of them, they're not at all precious to you (and just telling you they're supposed to be precious invokes the whole guilt thing), and maybe it will be better once that stage is passed.

Morgan Kelly 4-11-2008 @ 10:23AM

I totally agree! I keep saying, "once she can hold her head up, she can stop growing," then it becomes, "Once she can sit up on her own, then she can stop growing!" But then she'll do the next milestone, adorable thing and each stage that she goes thru is "the best!"

Michelle 4-11-2008 @ 10:42AM

Even though I went through 5 years of secondary infertility (currently 18 weeks pregnant with what will be my second baby), the sight of a newborn never did a thing for me. I always said I wanted to give birth to a 6 month old - my favorite baby age! Or maybe I would take a 3 month old. Like you I loved my daughter from before she was born, but the first few months are a blur, my really good memories, the ones you don't want to "wish away" don't start until about 3 months.

claire 4-11-2008 @ 11:13AM

I will be the person who "surely can't be for real," and say that I loved the first week or so of my son's newborn life. I was just so fascinated, I overlooked the lack of sleep and sore breasts and spit-up covered clothing and hanging skin everywhere. However, from about 3-7 weeks, I was OVER IT.
Despite that month though, that had me daily questioning "just what the hell I thought I was doing having a baby," I have loved every minute with my son. Like others have said, every milestone is a wonder and makes me anxious (in a good way) for the next one. I went through one brief period, when he was about 4 or 5 months old, where I had newborn fever. I almost (I blame residual hormones) considered getting preggo again, but then I came to my damn senses.
Anyway, all this is to say that I never understood how mothers could say "every stage is the best" (as someone stated above.) Now, though, I understand. It's absolutely amazing that it can just keep getting better and better.

Christina 4-11-2008 @ 11:29AM

I totally understand!

Jessica 4-11-2008 @ 11:44AM

I remember when mine was a newborn and the endless hours of just staring at her. Weeks of just staring. Well, that's not much fun. I was soooooo glad when she actually started doing something.

Lori 4-11-2008 @ 12:49PM

I hear you. I remember when one of my childless girlfriend's came to meet my newborn that first week. After oohhing and ahhing over him, and holding him for about 5 minutes, she looked over and said, "What else does he do?" That just sums it up perfectly. Not only are they little, wrinkly lumps, but that first time around I was stressing out about nursing, struggling to learn how to change diapers and staring over the basinet every 5 minutes to make sure he was still breathing. The first time my new son laughed I remember saying, "Thank goodness. I was afraid I'd given birth to a slug." The second time around I liked the newborn stage b/c the stress and paranoia were mostly gone, and I learned to appreciate how much newborns sleep during the day. I think the frequent napping helped make it easier for my two-year-old to adjust to being a big brother b/c I still had plenty of time to play with him.

Samantha Jo Campen 4-11-2008 @ 3:02PM

Oh praise the lord! Theo will be 6 weeks on Monday and I swear if he doesn't start to smile or SOMETHING I may lose my damn mind.

Shawna 4-11-2008 @ 6:12PM

I know exactly what you're talking about. Coincidentally, I just wrote an entry two days ago on how my love for my daughter grew over time.

http://talpidae.diaryland.com

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