Father and daughter have child
Categories: In the news
"I knew it was illegal, of course I knew it was illegal but you know, so what," John Deaves, 69, said of the relationship he has with his daughter, Jenny, 39.
The pair apparently reunited 31 years after Mr. Deaves separated from Jenny's mother, and felt attraction towards one another. Mrs Deaves said that "soon after reuniting with her father she began to see him as a man first and her father second. "
The pair have conceived two children together.
The first child died of a heart condition, but the second baby, Celeste, is a 9 month old girl who appears healthy and lives with her parents in Australia. Mrs Deaves also brought two children, Samantha and Alex, into the relationship after splitting from her former partner.
The couple, who went public with their relationship, say "We are just asking for a little bit of respect and understanding."
While I can only wish the best for their child, I cannot even begin to imagine the stigma she (or her half siblings) will grow up with, living with her parents.
A South Australian police media spokesman said "the couple is being monitored".
The Boston Globe's Jeff Jacoby who wrote a critical piece about the 'pregnant man' recently interviewed on Oprah, sees this couple's story as just as another example of how aberrant sexual behavior is becoming increasingly tolerated within society. And in both cases, the child involved will likely grow up under constant public scrutiny.
What do you think? Should the Deaves be granted "respect and understanding" for their decision to have children, or is their relationship (in addition to being illegal) taking things way too far?
Recent Posts
- Feist's Sesame Street appearance (7/19/2008)
- Minnie Driver set to be a chubby mommy (7/19/2008)
- Dad called pervert for taking pictures of his own kids in public (7/19/2008)
- Gas containers must now be child resistant (7/19/2008)
- Fertility goes Brave New World (7/19/2008)
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
Jessica 4-14-2008 @ 10:43AM
Are they biologically related or just through marriage? I couldn't tell from either your post or the linked article.
Reply
Juana 4-18-2008 @ 1:15PM
Are there no laws on the books in Australia for commiting
incest? This is so outrageous that I cannot even begin
to understand. This type of behavior must be punished
if there are laws against this. I feel very, very sorry for
this little girl. What next, when she get's older, dear ole
dad/granddad will want to sleep with her also?
Angela 4-14-2008 @ 10:44AM
I think they've gone too far by just trying to have children. Incest causes birth defects. How can you wish that on your own child? Personally, I think their relationship is just sick even though they have not known each-other for 31 years, the fact remains that he is her biological father. They can have a 'relationship' if they want but to bring children in this... just wrong. They could've adopted or used a sperm donor but my biggest concern is birth defects. Some of the current genetic defects are found to have been caused by incest in early 1700's or earlier. (re: Usher's Syndrome or Waardenburg's Syndrome) There is a reason why we just don't do this in today's society. Sorry but this have pushed a button with me because they brought into the world two children, with 1 dying from a heart condition. Do we know for sure if that child died from a birth defect caused by incest? I know people who has birth defects from incest and it's sad to see them suffer. Just wrong...
Reply
Canadian Coco 4-14-2008 @ 10:45AM
Disgusting.
Reply
Jen Henry 4-14-2008 @ 10:55AM
There are reasons that this is illegal. This is not even so much a matter of what is socially acceptable. The man that was pregnant? That's purely a social issue, however there was no biological harm in him carrying a child. Homosexuality? Once again a social issue...purely makes people uncomfortable, but homosexuals do not biologically reproduce (at least not without help from a 3rd party).
But this? These children are being created from the same set of genes. Incest was made illegal because procreation through incestuous relationships can lead to all sorts of abnormalities.
I don't doubt she is attracted to him...HE'S HER FATHER. You're supposed to feel love for him. She seems very confused and I can't help but wonder what precipitated such a thing? Did events occur in her childhood that made her behave this way? As an incest survivor myself I'm beginning to wonder if there wasn't some sort of conditioning that occurred earlier in her life?
Reply
Uly 4-14-2008 @ 6:05PM
Actually, the odds of them having an abnormal child are only slightly higher than in the general population.
Any two people with bad genes can have a child with problems, and any two people with good genes can have a healthy child. Being related increases the odds of both people having the bad genes, but it doesn't cause defects to just spring out of the ether in punishment.
Nicola 4-14-2008 @ 11:37AM
This was certainly not a smart decision on the part of two adults, but it isn't quite the same as most of us having sex with our fathers either. It appears that they had last seen each other when she was perhaps 12 months old. Their relationship after meeting again was simply as two adults. Yes, ew, but they felt an attraction and they very unwisely ran with it. Technically it is incest, but emotionally in this case, I don't believe that either of them saw it that way. They have one child who died as a result and another who will probably be creeped out by her parents when she's old enough to understand. One of them should have walked away as soon as the attraction became apparent, but perhaps good decisions don't run in the family :-P
Reply
isisaquaria 4-14-2008 @ 11:44AM
One child died--I feel for the loss, but get real---incest is illegal because of genetic problems such as heart conditions.
WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS--if he will sleep with one daughter, will he sleep with the other?
Reply
Christy 4-14-2008 @ 12:06PM
Come on...now. We all know that incest is illegal as do the father and daughter who acknowledged it but is there no consequences. I mean, when people break the law, are we going to just let it slide time and time again. How are we to teach our children that abiding by the law is serious if authoritive members don't even follow through. No wonder we have troubled children when they are not only bombarded with issues regarding tv, school, home life, etc...now we have to wonder if there is going to be any consequences to breaking the rules. Oh and this thing about the man being pregnant, I have to say it out loud somewhere....it's not really a man if she still has her reproductive organs. If she still has female genitalia doesn't that make her a female...and not a male. SO why is it a big deal that a person who is a WOMAN who looks like a man but ISN'T is pregnant. I'm over it!!
Reply
Lori 4-14-2008 @ 2:25PM
Even discounting all of the genetic issues this "couple's" incestuous relationship could create, they obviously have emotional issues as well. Their daughter/grandchild/sister probably needs to be removed from the situation until the couple ends their sexual relationship and everyone should undergo counselling for the sake of that poor little girl.
Reply
eugene 4-14-2008 @ 3:24PM
This is foul on so many levels. It's one sick and perverted thing if you willingly want to be in an incestuous relationship with a family memeber another level of disgusting if you're willing to bring a child into this world. Even if you dismiss the considerable biological reasons, the social stigma that child will have to endure is just too sad to think about.
Reply
Jorn Knuttila 4-14-2008 @ 4:26PM
Can I borrow your mellon-baller? Uhm, yeah, I need to scoop out the part of my brain where this story is recorded. Thanks. I'll wash it.
Reply
Jamie 4-14-2008 @ 4:48PM
Beyond my scope of understanding. I find it very troubling that they chose to bring a child into the relationship. I would not have wanted a Grandpa/Father.
Reply
isisaquaria 4-14-2008 @ 5:10PM
Other articles found online indicate that the courts have placed a ban on the physical relationship---unclear if b4 2nd child or after. Sounds like somebody is trying
Reply
Heather 4-14-2008 @ 5:34PM
Thanks Christy for having the guts to say that. Any woman could cut their hair, sew on a penis and call them self a man. This 'man' is a woman. (A confused woman maybe) Sorry but to be a man one needs to be born a man. Best of luck to the children born by their father or conceived by their grandfather. I feel sorry for these kids, they didn't ask to be judged from the get go.
Reply
the goddess anna 4-14-2008 @ 5:57PM
NOT condoning the couple, but when I read this on Fox News, their first child's heart condition was not caused by the incest (it was a fairly common defect). I know this couple leaves a horrid taste in everyone's mouth, but it's not quite right to blame the death of the first child on their incest (since it's been proven otherwise).
Reply
Kelsey 4-14-2008 @ 8:00PM
Sexual attarction to a long-lost sibling, parent, child, etc. is actual not that uncommon. It is recognized has one of many emotional issuses reunited relatives may have to deal with. That being said, most people deal with the attarction through therapy and counseling, not making babies.
Reply
Allison 4-14-2008 @ 9:41PM
Actually, there have been more and more details about this... situation... released as the weeks have progressed. They did have contact during Ms Deaves's (not Mrs Deaves - that's her mother) childhood, so it wasn't like she'd never seen her father at all and fell in love with a stranger.
What is sickening is the fact that Mr Deaves said to his ex-partner (his second wife), that he'd 'had the best sex I've ever had with her' after a meeting with Ms Deaves in 2000 (http://www.smh.com.au/news/national/sick-you-dont-know-where-to-turn/2008/04/08/1207420349097.html).
Yuck.
Reply
heather 4-15-2008 @ 12:01PM
Very scary.
They can't be sane. How can any normal man have sex with his child unless he is a child molester no matter what their age. Even if he found out later most people would be repulsed and end the relationship. This so completly abnormal and it is terrifiying that they are raising a child.
Reply
Dee 4-15-2008 @ 2:09PM
Gross, disgusting, barf-me-out, nasty, repulsive...I can go on forever with adjectives to describe this "couple".I'd love to be a fly on the wall when the child grows up and they explain the details of how she came into the world: "Oh, honey, he's your father/grandfather and I'm your mother/sister." Talk about dysfunctional!!! I wouldn't be surprised if the kid hurls herself off a bridge after hearing that. What saddens me most is all the normal couples in the world who desperately want children but can't conceive, yet these two can reproduce with no problem. This is one of those "why, God?" moments.
Reply