When are you having baby #2?
Jenifer Garner's recent response to this question made me smile because it's pretty much exactly what I manage to mutter whenever someone asks.
"Sometime. I don't know. I have to think about that one."
Garner's lovely daughter Violet is 2, and two seems to be the magical age that makes everyone in the universe--both random strangers and dear friends--feel the need to inquire about future procreating plans.
When my son turned 2 the whole "when are you having a second?" became something I was asked on a nearly weekly basis. He is now 3 and the concern from random strangers, or the raised eyebrows from friends who've gone and had a second kid, seems to grow more urgent with every passing month.
"But don't you want your kids to be close in age so they can be friends?"
"You won't want to start all over again with diapers once you're out of them! It's better to do it all at once!"
Etc. And basically, it feels like behind every questions is an accusation: You're a wimp. Suck it up and have a second kid right now because that's what everybody does.
Garner is a delightfully refreshing down-to-earth celeb mama. She seems to truly enjoy motherhood, and she seems like she actually is a hands-on mother, which is more than many Hollywood mamas can boast. Which makes her hesitant answer all the more authentic.
Parenting is damn hard, sometimes. Especially when the kid is under 3. Sleep deprivation made me feel insane for brief episodes of time. And it's only just now, that I'm starting to feel like my life is no longer defined by motherhood, and my son is still crawling into my bed in the middle of the night when he wakes up. Which isn't to say I don't love motherhood, because I do. I've loved every single stage my son has gone through. And I think that we will have a second one. Sometime. Maybe.
It meantime, it seems like Garner and I both need to master the fine art of the sarcastic come back. Got any?