There goes my neighborhood
Categories: Just for moms, Babies, Just for dads, Money & work, Places to go, Life & style, Rumors, Environment, Mommy wars
Actually, it's my former neighborhood. Apparently--and please pardon me, as there may be just a teensy little bit of bile forming in the back of my throat (and it's NOT morning sickness)--the creator of Melrose Place are considering another such type show set in, gag, Park Slope. For those of you unfamiliar with the Slope, it's in Brooklyn, New York. The people who live there think it's the bomb--the epitome of making it in, well, at least Brooklyn if not New York.
People move from Manhattan to Brooklyn, specifically, to have their babies and clog the sidewalks with their OBNOXIOUS (note, I didn't use the word annoying--it's not annoying; it is, in fact, OBNOXIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!) double-wide strollers and brag to each other and anyone else endlessly about how wonderful they are from all their righteousness and do-gooding. None of which is mixed with an ounce of altruism.
And I used to be one of them. Well, sort of. I fled to Windsor Terrace (sort of like the older cousin of the Slope whose been around the block and knows better) long before I thought about babies--my own, anyway. See, you can't live in the Slope without at least one kid. They'll scorn you otherwise. Seriously. And regardless of cost, they must have the best of everything--you will be snubbed for a simple Maclaren umbrella style stroller like the one I have when you could have shelled out $800 for whatever Euro design is hot this week. I'm basically considered a bad parent by these people because I don't have one. But mine folds up. Easily. With one hand.
Sounds like it's just up Darren Star's alley. I can assure you I won't be watching--I get to live it every time I go to work, or Barnes and Noble, or attempt to eat out. What's funny, though, is that no one thinks they're like that who comes from the Slope. And a lot of them aren't. But, many of them are, and they annoy the rest of us in Brooklyn.
Now they can annoy you, too!
Ah, I guess I'm being too hard on them. After all, they're not really doing anything that bad, other than giving Starbucks all their money (and I am guilty of that too!) and taking up entire sidewalks with their REALLY wide strollers while yammering on their cell phones, oblivious that everyone else gets to use the sidewalk, too. They drive about as well as their toddlers. But they're basically good people trying to make a dent in navigating their way through the strange universe that is Brooklyn, that is New York. And if they get there one latte at a time it's ok. I do it too!
If Darren Star has anything to say about it, though, they'll be plotting murders and ring leading drug circles and heaven knows what else. Hey--the Slope could be fun again!
Pic of the Slope pre-gentrification by pingnews.com.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Katheryn 5-04-2008 @ 12:58PM
Wow. What a whole lot of negativity coming from you. Sounds like you definitely have some issues. Hopefully writing this awful post has made it all better though.
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Greta 5-04-2008 @ 5:12PM
Yeah, wow, Katheryn's right - you have some serious issues. I am used to hearing occasional PS-bashing, but it's almost always from people who don't live here, so I figure they just don't know any better. Having lived in Park Slope for 8 years, I know the neighborhood and its inhabitants really well. There may be a very tiny handful of people who fit your description, but by and large this is a fantastic place to live for both families or people without kids. We live in an 8-unit co-op on 5th Ave, and we're the only family in the building with a small child. I can't remember the last time I saw a double-wide stroller, and most of the families are very down-to-earth people who don't give a crap about brand names. We love that there's a small-town feel where you can run into friends on every street, there's always a playground or wonderful Prospect Park a few blocks away, the restaurants and shops are fantastic, and you can walk pretty much everywhere - we don't even own a car.
When I heard about the potential plans for a show located in the neighborhood last week, I was a little worried about what kind of story they would tell about Park Slope, but I'm afraid that you've given off a much worse impression already in your vitriolic rant.
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Ethel 5-04-2008 @ 5:16PM
Those folks are everywhere. Just take our family, we too have a double wide stroller that we employ and sometimes it's my husband who is using it and if its him he is always chatting on the phone with a friend. The only exception is that we are of the few that use sidewalks around here for walking - the sidewalk is most often used for parking that third car that just won't fit in front of the garage.
Now if the freaking doors at the coffee shops were a smidge wider we'd be parking that baby in there too.
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CLM 5-05-2008 @ 11:09AM
I don't think the Slope is quite THAT bad, but I will admit the dh and I fled once Starbucks showed up. The one thing we REALLY miss is the Food Co-op.
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3boys 5-28-2008 @ 1:01PM
When our kids were small we bought 3 different tandem strollers to test and returned the 2 that failed. We learned that a double-wide stroller didn't provide enough arm space for the kids. We kept a front and back seat stroller with the rear seat higher so the smaller child could see over the older child's head, OR the back seat could lay flat for napping. Go for function over style even if you have to lie and tell the momzillas you have to use it because your brother-in-law owns the company. I pity those kids being crushed in those double-wide things and I view their parents as being as clueless as if their child were sucking on a lead-based painted Thomas the tank engine.
But that's not really what this is about, right? Just remember it's their own insecurities that cause that snooty behavior. Read the Glass Castle and you'll feel better. You're doing a great job.
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