How much do you really need for baby #2?
Categories: Newborns, Babies, Pregnancy & birth, Baby essentials, Resources
The other day I found myself wandering the aisles of Babies R' Us looking for a few small items for my almost-toddler aged son. I was surrounded by hundreds--no, thousands--of items, and by nearly as many bewildered parents-to-be, all of them searching for just the right...everything!
Seems like first time parents have a really hard time making sense of what they really need, what can wait, and what is fad or just plain silly (see, in my opinion, wipe warmers). The second time around, though, it should be easier to figure out what you need, right?
And, what's moreso, you should already have all the stuff, or at least most of it, right? Here is the thing, though--well, several of them:
1. People tend to get rid of stuff, whether or not they need it.
2. Even if they do have the space to store baby items, it's entirely possible the old version will be covered with baby much OR, what's worse, the item will be declared unsafe or find itself recalled.
3. Some people really have an issue with using the same items--sheets, blankets, clothes--for children of the opposite sex. Not many of us really have that much green or yellow baby clothing. And bedding and that sort of thing tend to be very specific toward one sex or the other.
The other thing to consider is that we only get one baby shower. And, thank heavens--it's the sweetest thing in the world to do for someone, but. they're costly, time-consuming and a lot of hard work. All of this is for a good cause, to be sure, but, luckily, merciful etiquette dictates a mother to be should only be given a shower for her first child. Any time another young one enters the brood, the idea is that mom already has all the essentials she needs to get the job done right.
And, I tend to agree with etiquette. I really feel like I have just about all I could possibly need for baby #2. Through the kindness of my friends and family, along with the things I've picked up on my own, I feel like I have more than enough to get the job done. Should the second baby turn out to be a girl, she may end up using sheets with baseball bats on them and wearing blue onesies, but I've always said I wouldn't mind if she didn't!
Anything you can think of a second baby would need? All I can think of is another carseat!
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
claire 5-13-2008 @ 9:13PM
I don't have any suggestions, since i only have the one kid and way too much stuff for just him, but I just wanted to say that I know a lot of people who have showers for EVERY baby. I really have no problem with it, since I'm not a big spender for folks who aren't my bestest friends (in which case, I would buy (and have bought) them lots of baby presents even if they didn't have subsequent showers), and I'm not a stickler for tradition anyway. I just wondered if it was a regional thing or if the women I know have just eschewed tradition to get more stuff (more power to them if people will fall for it!)
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Holly 5-13-2008 @ 9:27PM
What you say makes sense, except that new things keep on coming out. For my daughter, I bought Dr. Brown's standard bottles, but I found them a little hard to clean. If there's a next time around, I'll buy the wide-mouth bottles because the parts are bigger and a bottle brush will fit in them more easily.
There are also new breast-pumps and strollers and cool exersaucers. I don't know if I'll be able to resist!
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kelly.leahy 5-13-2008 @ 11:25PM
Both of my kids were the same sex and 25 months apart. I bought a three pack of newborn gowns and a diaper bag. I didn't even have to buy diapers as we reused our stash of cloth ones.
I would have bought another baby book had we not already been given an extra one for the first child.
That said, I bought a lot more for myself ... house cleaner, massage, doula :)
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Christina 5-14-2008 @ 9:10AM
We need things that broke with the first one OR we did not get with the first one. Two items that broke/no longer work properly that I consider ESSENTIAL: a bouncer and a monitor.
We did not have a bassinet with the first one.
We need to replace the bottles that we spent a million bucks on and I saved because they are now "bad" plastic ~ Funny thing I would have preferred the glass the first time around but I could never find any!
I am reusing a lot of stuff from my 1st (sheets, clothing - we did not know the sex so most of the 1-6 month stuff is green or yellow & other items that I do not care if my baby girl has gender specific on...) I would like a new diaper bag ~ we had one from our first and it was horrid. And I am planning to hire a house cleaner to come during these last months of pregnancy and my time off with the new baby. I just do not have the time and energy to deal with a toddler, a newborn and house duties.
My work wanted to throw me a 2nd shower mostly to celebrate the baby but we are getting some stuff from them. I am glad. I understand that this is not normal but I am glad for it. In fact I wish I had my showers for the 2nd baby rather then the first because I know more about what we could possibly need or want. I have gone the way of more organic stuff to be used for this baby. I would like to switch over on some things this time around. Honestly I am grateful for this 2nd shower and not because I am getting MORE stuff but stuff we need.
From a friend we received enough hand me down clothing to last us until the the child is 2 years old. THAT TOTALLY ROCKS. It is also garage sale season so we hit those up regularly.
We were pretty poor the 1st time around and we hardly knew anyone as we had moved to the area around the time we became pregnant. Our needs are not essential but things that with our first we thought OH that would be nice to have but we did not get from showers, family or could afford ourselves. This is our last baby so we are going to enjoy it and buy what we need. The thing we live by is that we do plan to pass things along to people who need it down the road once we no longer need it so I feel okay about buying or receiving baby stuff.
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Jennifer 6-03-2008 @ 11:42AM
As a mommy of two little boys, there are plenty of things a second baby needs. My boys were born in different seasons and the newborn winter intems I had saved would not work for my June baby. There were a few basic clothes that would work (onesie, sleeper, overalls) but we had to buy many items. Also, who has the extra space to store a crib, changing table, high chair, play saucer, bouncy seat, stroller, baby tub, etc.?! My cousin had her kids very close together and her first was still using the crib, high chair, stroller, etc. We usually give showers for each new blessing and I think it is sad to not welcome the new sibling with just as much fanfare.
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the goddess anna 6-03-2008 @ 12:38PM
Slightly off-topic, but I did find a very good use for the wipe warmer that we recieved as a gift. A warmed wipe was better at getting off that crusty poo first thing in the morning (from the poop that baby did probably 20 minutes after going to sleep). They were also more readily accepted by the kids for such uses as hand and face wiping. I would never buy one, but don't chuck it if it's a gift.
We needed to buy a new set of everything for my second pregnancy, but only because I had twins. The only thing we ended up not needing was the second crib - they turn 3 on Friday, and refuse to sleep apart. They have slept together since their second night in the NICU. We have given away the duplicates of everything now, but I know better now what to do if we have twins again!
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