PD*poll: Transgendered third grader sparks controversy

What a family decides to do with their child is their business. What I choose to tell my child is my business. I would have been upset to hear that the school was going to discuss this issue with my child. I would have kept her out and discussed it with her myself.
I do have to give them a little credit in letting parents know ahead of time; but they may have needed to give a bit more warning.
I also think that, if you are involved in your child's classroom, this probably wouldn't be a surprise. Maybe you didn't know for sure, but you had suspisions.
I read about this story a few days ago and was floored that the school thought they needed to have a counseling session with the children. What they need to do is have a session with the parents in how to deal with this issue and talk about it with their children.
Parents need to take control over parenting issues and stop letting the schools solve all the problems.

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Mamloo - if there wasn't an agenda out there to do away with gender entirely - then I might agree with you. I do agree with you that there should be a discussion about how to treat people (all people), but I would not want the school to be the ones handling the transgender issue with my child.

It is not like there is a general consensus on how to handle transgendered children and that schools are the experts that have the one and only answer. This is still a controversial topic.

If I received a notice like this in my child's backpack, we would definately have a discussion at home, and then I would probably send the child to school and be part of the discussion at school. I would want to know exactly what was said to my child so I could further discuss the issue at home.

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This is a very special issue. It is my feelings that a lettert should have been sent to the parents first with an explainaton that this has come upas a new concern and what actions the school plans to take and a time shedule as to when the actions are to begin. However, there should have been an inquiry as to the participation of the children and the parents. The school does need to address the issue, but the parents have a right to some input and the decision as to how and whenm they want their child to participate. In addition, parents shoulkd have the freedom to attend and participate in the sessions as they feel the need to do so.

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Beautifully said, Mamaloo! And I agree with the author of this post, that these parents are absolutely doing the right thing by supporting their child.

If you've done much reading on this subject, you know that in pretty much every single instance of adult TG, they KNEW as children that they were in the "wrong body". Trying to get a child to "be comfortable" with the gender they were born with when they completely identify as the opposite gender is the same as telling a gay person to just "be straight". It's total denial and it won't work. This is why the rate of suicide is so high among gay teens, because they aren't getting the support they need.

We can't bury our heads in the sand; we HAVE to acknowledge and support people who are different. And if you don't want your child to be exposed to children who are "different", by all means home-school or, as Kristin (above) does, send them to a private school so they can be taught in accordance with your personal beliefs.

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I'd be upset about not getting enough notice and if the school is going to do something like sensitivity training for such young kids why didn't they run that info past the parents first? I'd be VERY interested in what the school is going to say to my kid and I'd like to be able to follow up with the training when she comes home.

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I can't believe half you people who say you don't want this addressed at the school level as well.

I think the parents that believe this should be handled ALL by the school are idiots, but I certainly think that the school is on the right track to be addressing it as well. The parents of the children in the class should obviously be speaking with their kids about this AS WELL as the school. This needs both parties to help and be supportive. It's not up to the parents to say "I'm the only one to teach my child this!" and nor is it up to the school to do it by themselves.

This is something that needs to be dealt with on all levels as it helps create a very well rounded environment for it. Otherwise some parents teach differently than others and some flat out don't care. There needs to be a point of balance that everyone can see as well. Only hopes is that the teachers handle this properly. As a parent I certainly would want to be kept up to date on how the school is handling it and possibly be a part of it, but I certainly would not scream that the school has no right to talk to my child about it.

This is the environment that my child will be spending the majority of their childhood in, I would expect that things like this are handled there as well and not just at home. Do we all of a sudden need to change who we are and how we think depending on where we are? It takes a whole village to raise a child!

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Most of the people posting here have offered opinions, and they have been for the most part sensible and good; But there are few things more damaging then badly applied pseudo-science.

Eugene wrote;

"Transgenderism is where the person believes that he or she is actually a member of the opposite sex. The current thinking is that this is a psychological disorder such as people who think they belong to a different race or people who think that their leg belongs to someone else and is treated as such."

You sir, are an idiot. You speak as if with authority but you have no learning behind the words. 'Current thinking'? Really? Who is thinking it, and where? The floor manager at a moron factory? Guan-Tan? You might as well claim, 'The Current Thinking' is that the Earth is flat, women are made from ribs and thalidomide does a pregnant mum the world of good. 'Current Thinking' is a term often used by people who wish to appear more intelligent then they are. What are your qualifications? You don't appear to have a clue what you're talking about.

Your thinking was disproved during the eighties - about the point that the brains if transgendered people were studied and found to exhibit the structural qualities of their 'chosen' gender, not of their supposed 'born' gender; The structure of the brain cannot be changed, with no amount of wishful thinking. It is your brain. It is who you are.

I am a UK specialist in TS cognitive therapy. Outside of the US the issue of transgenderism is regarded in a very different light. A collegue of mine is of the belief that the US system is around thirty years behind that of the UK, Canada or Iran, and I believed this to be unfair until I read the above quoted nonsense - And now I'm quite angry, because it's the same level of idiocy that was being written in the sixties when biologists claimed that all women were entirely controlled by beta-endorphins.

As to Eugene, as to anybody who reads a story like this and thinks 'Ugh, not me, not mine, not my child' - Perhaps you should look up some of the statistics for depression and suicide amongst transgender children, especially the teenagers - It is the hardest time (something the child in the article has been mercifully spared by her deeply, deeply sensible parents). These are terrifying figures. While young I lost two friends who could not face the kind of ignorence the world held for them and chose other ways out. They were seperate cases but very similar; they never told their parents why. It is probably why I chose this field of work, and why I feel personally enough to write this response.

That, and, I am a transgender man anyway, so I might as well defend my own honour in the face of accusations of... What was it again, Eugene? 'Psychological disorder'?

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I accidentally hit the "enter" key and truncated my reply to you. I understand this is a touchy subject for you, so I'll give you some grace. However, I don't appreciate being called an idiot, especially from someone who clearly chose to read certain words and draw their own conclusion from what I wrote.

Yes, most people, at least in the US, consider transgenderism to be a "disorder". Any quick google search would tell you that as most of the literature and articles on the subject are slanted in that fashion. However, if you had bothered to read my entire post, you would have seen that the ENTIRE LAST PARAGRAPH was about prograssive ways for both the transgendered individual and his/her families to deal with the situation, including early intervention in order to prevent puberty and to encourage body development along lines more congruent with the transgendered individual's sense of self.

I also made what was CLEARLY DISPARAGING remarks about how homosexuals were "treated" and compared the current "treatment" for transgendered individuals in that light. One of what is clearly a form of brainwashing or forced personality modification.

Last, let us say that the COMPLETELY UNFAIR accusations you so angrily hurled at me were correct, and I was some right wing bible thumper saying that transgenderism was some sort of deviant psychological condition. My language was completely clinical and devoid of personal attacks or insults, so where do you get off calling me an idiot?

You owe me an apology.

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I am sorry Eugene; But I do think you're an idiot. I am sorry that you don't see why, though. This means you’ll probably make all the same mistakes in the future; Poor guy.

I was half-tempted to write a very long dissemination on Why You Are So Wrong – Why bother? Look at everyone who thought you needed defending. Ask them. I’m not angry at you, I’m angry at the words you used. It’s not your fault, perhaps. Someone told you these things in a loud voice that sounded confident and you followed. It’s not uncommon. But you must be better educated about your subject, if you’re going to be so eager to take up the soapbox. You never stated whether you were TG, or you had friends or family who were, if you work with TG people; You said nothing of the kind and if you did now, it wouldn’t look true. I have no children yet and until I do I wouldn’t dream of lecturing my sisters or friends who are rearing their own. Why? Because I have no experience in that area – As you can imagine. I am only 26 after all :p

Lets get back on topic. You might love space and rockets, but without a degree they wont let you into NASA, and without qualifications on a matter as sensitive as this, YOU really shouldn’t be telling people where the science lays, should you? In fact, you don’t know that I am a professional, or TG either, I might be lying. Don’t take anyone’s words on a forum as fact, not ever - Instead, try http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender , a page that does know what it talks about and is the sum total of much contributed work. It’s even got half a column inch dedicated to Transphobia; Followed by the arguments that typify this viewpoint.

They’re some of the things that you brought up, actually.

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