How not to adopt
Categories: Pregnancy & birth, Adoption
Oh come on. We all saw Juno. Everyone knows the way you find a kid to adopt is to put an ad in the Penny Saver. Sheesh. So I guess not everyone actually saw that movie. A couple near Seattle, Washington tried a different approach recently. Noticing that their waitress was pregnant, they left their card with the tip. Along with their names and phone numbers, the card said "We wish to adopt a baby. We are a caring, happily married, financially secure and loving couple. We want to share our joy and love with a child."For Julie Moore and her husband J.D. Ross, the card was an unpleasant surprise. "I was just shocked because they didn't say a word to me about being pregnant, ask me how my pregnancy is going or ask me if I was pregnant or anything," said Julie. "I don't wear a wedding ring at work. For them to assume I'm not married or that I'm working in a service industry that I maybe couldn't afford to have a child, I don't know, I felt there were too many assumptions there," she added.
As for her husband, he "thought it was really creepy." According to the prospective adoptive parent's lawyer, there haven't been any negative responses before, but I guess there haven't been any positive ones or they wouldn't still be looking. Perhaps they might be more successful with a less cheeky method?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Kellie 5-23-2008 @ 11:48PM
A little presumptuous, yes, but I'm betting that they desperately want a baby and maybe they are past the point of being rational. As someone who can get pregnant and have babies it's not something I would do. As the friend of people who cannot get pregnant and are waiting for a baby, I can completely understand this happening.
Understanding why this happened is as easy as putting yourself in the want-to-be parents shoes.
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Sherry 5-25-2008 @ 4:29AM
I am not sure I think it is okay to just go around handing out cards to pregnant women you run into hoping they will give you their child, but why are these people making such a big deal about it? Did they really need to alert the media? Was just throwing the card in the trash beyond their ability? I think not. Sure, maybe the parents who want to adopt are out of line with their approach, but I can't help but questions the motives of the parents who are making a fuss about a card they could have easily ignored.
And I don't see anything in the wording on the card that would make a women feel that she is unfit to be a mother and the kid would be better off with someone else. Sure it might make some people angry, like it did with this pregnant woman; but I think that card would only have any effect at all if the pregnant women was already considering adoption. If she was, then what is wrong with her considering this couple? I very seriously doubt this card would make someone suddenly decide out of the blue, "Hey, I was going to keep this baby, but I think I will give it away instead." But then I assume most people have a little sense and aren't so easily manipulated that they will be done in by a card left on a table.
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ARJ 5-25-2008 @ 9:44AM
Umm...I don't think the pregnant mom was saying the card made her consider putting her child up for adoption. I think she was outraged at the class assumptions inherent in the fact that the couple gave her the card.
mc 6-02-2008 @ 9:51AM
Where I live, I often feel I have to be extra careful as I live right next to the Mexican border. On two occasions I have had wealthy Mexican Nationals offer me $10,000 and $15,000 for my unborn children.I'm blond with blue eyes which is pretty rare here but it can also be status symbol in Mexico. There are also (prevalent) stories of babies and pregnant mothers being kidnapped and taken over there.
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paragraphein 7-17-2008 @ 2:16PM
"A little presumptuous, yes, but I'm betting that they desperately want a baby and maybe they are past the point of being rational."
That doesn't make it okay.
Adoption is supposed to be about providing for CHILDREN, not about finding babies for adults. Sadly, finding babies for adults is exactly what the infant adoption industry is all about.
And why should anyone put themselves in these people's shoes? What about putting on the shoes of pregnant women who might be vulnerable to suggestiongs that they don't deserve their motherhood--what about empathy for the thousands of women who are EVERY YEAR separated from their children by baby-hungry prospective adoptive parents and money-hungry attorneys and agencies?
This is SICKENING.
Sadly, it's really NOT all that unusual.
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