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High school girls make pregnancy pact
Filed under: Teens, In The News, Single Parenting, Sex
Earlier this year, when an unusually high number of girls began showing up in the Gloucester High School clinic asking for pregnancy tests, school officials began to wonder what was going on. Was it a fluke? Was it the influence of movies like Juno and Knocked Up? No, it was actually something much more disturbing : a group of girls at the Massachusetts high school had made a pact that they would all get pregnant and raise their babies together. By the time school was out for the summer, seventeen of them had succeeded in getting knocked up. On purpose.
What on earth would possess a group of high school girls to do this? Former student Amanda Ireland thinks she knows. She gave birth during her freshman year at Gloucester and says the reaction from her fellow students was not what you would expect. She wasn't shunned or pitied. She says she was envied by girls who wanted what they thought she was getting from her child: love. "They're so excited to finally have someone to love them unconditionally," Ireland says. "I try to explain it's hard to feel loved when an infant is screaming to be fed at 3 a.m."
Ireland was able to complete her education at Gloucester because the school goes to great lengths to support teen mothers. There is an on-site daycare and babies at school are a common site. But after administering some 150 pregnancy tests by May, the clinic's medical director, Dr. Brian Orr, and the school nurse, Kim Daly, began to advocate prescribing contraceptives without parental consent. That idea was promptly shot down and both have since resigned in protest. "Dr. Orr and Ms. Daly have no right to decide this for our children," says Mayor Carolyn Kirk.
It is a shame those two lost their jobs over it, but a lack of easily available contraceptives is clearly not what got these girls where they are. They didn't want birth control pills, they wanted babies. But why? School superintendent Christopher Farmer blames the economy. The blue-collar fishing town has seen an economic downturn over the past decade and many jobs have disappeared overseas. "Families are broken," he says. "Many of our young people are growing up directionless."
There may be something to that theory, but I suspect it is much more complicated than that. Back in my day, there was a certain stigma attached to teen mothers. Pregnant girls did not attend regular classes and they certainly didn't bring their kids to school with them. Is it possible that this school, and others like it, encourage teens to have children by lessening the consequences? Or is this just an extreme case of group-think in girls too young to know better?
What on earth would possess a group of high school girls to do this? Former student Amanda Ireland thinks she knows. She gave birth during her freshman year at Gloucester and says the reaction from her fellow students was not what you would expect. She wasn't shunned or pitied. She says she was envied by girls who wanted what they thought she was getting from her child: love. "They're so excited to finally have someone to love them unconditionally," Ireland says. "I try to explain it's hard to feel loved when an infant is screaming to be fed at 3 a.m."
Ireland was able to complete her education at Gloucester because the school goes to great lengths to support teen mothers. There is an on-site daycare and babies at school are a common site. But after administering some 150 pregnancy tests by May, the clinic's medical director, Dr. Brian Orr, and the school nurse, Kim Daly, began to advocate prescribing contraceptives without parental consent. That idea was promptly shot down and both have since resigned in protest. "Dr. Orr and Ms. Daly have no right to decide this for our children," says Mayor Carolyn Kirk.
It is a shame those two lost their jobs over it, but a lack of easily available contraceptives is clearly not what got these girls where they are. They didn't want birth control pills, they wanted babies. But why? School superintendent Christopher Farmer blames the economy. The blue-collar fishing town has seen an economic downturn over the past decade and many jobs have disappeared overseas. "Families are broken," he says. "Many of our young people are growing up directionless."
There may be something to that theory, but I suspect it is much more complicated than that. Back in my day, there was a certain stigma attached to teen mothers. Pregnant girls did not attend regular classes and they certainly didn't bring their kids to school with them. Is it possible that this school, and others like it, encourage teens to have children by lessening the consequences? Or is this just an extreme case of group-think in girls too young to know better?
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ReaderComments (Page 4 of 7)
6-26-2008 @ 5:53PM
Eww! said...Our society is fucked up today and those pregnant teen girls are really dumb to get pregnant. I don't find it cute or chic at all! I feel bad for those guys with child support payments if those guys decide to flee!
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6-21-2008 @ 4:52PM
bogino said...This is the absolute Pits in Irresponsibilty. These babies should be TAKEN AWAY from this stupid kids and given up for adoption.
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6-21-2008 @ 4:48PM
Joanna said...I feel so sorry for all those babies. These girls sound like a bunch of wackos.
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6-21-2008 @ 4:48PM
Maggie Denson said...It is a terrible shame that these young girls do not even imagine what it takes to raise a baby. First, they should consider the baby.
Who knows what disease those men have or have had. When they have to take the baby to the doctor, they won't have a daddy around. If the baby needs something, such as a blood transfusion, how will they know, if they don't know the Father or what type of blood he has? OR if he has some std. They have never thought of how difficult it is raise a baby, and I'm afraid they are not going to like it. When the school friends, who are not in this group, start going out to parties and such, they are going to be so sad to know they cannot go. When a woman has a baby, it is up to her to do the right thing and take care of it. I would imagine they are going to be calling on Mom, Dad or both to care for their responsiblity.
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6-21-2008 @ 4:55PM
Renee said...I don't know these girls and I don't know their parents. However, when kids are looking for "love" then they are lacking from something from home. How many parents know exactly where their kids are when they are not at home? How many parents automatically believe their children because it is easier to just "trust" them than to actually check up on them? How many parents have the persistant attitude to continue checking on the whereabouts of their kids, their kids' friends, and the stories that their kid tells them to know if they are true? It may sound like I believe that you can trust no children, but that is not the case. Trust is a valuable tool and if it is broken then it can only be built back one small test at a time. All of us were teenagers at one time. You all must surely remember getting away with something that your parents didn't know about. Parenting is not for naive people or you will be run over so fast you won't know what hit you.
It is the parent's responsibility to teach morals and values (the best way a kid learns morals and values is by watching what their parents do--ouch--reality check). It is the parent's responsibility to check on their kids, to know their kids' friends (and I mean know them--not just say hi as you pass through the house), to know where they spend their time and with whom, and by doing this and actively talking to them daily for more than 2 minutes, and by setting limits and consequences and sticking to them--not caving in, you are giving them the greatest gift, which is yourself. It takes your time, your commitment, your persistance, and your desire to mold and guide your children. Parenting is a job and can be a very rewarding job, but it takes work and commitment and guidance from God and still it may not turn out as you would like, but you tried. Ignorance may be bliss, but I believe their are many children being hurt by it.
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6-21-2008 @ 4:55PM
Spaghetti said...This is also going to have a big impact on the childs life. It is going to be raised by a young mother strugling to make ends meet.
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6-21-2008 @ 4:55PM
Ro said...Maybe a chastity belt?
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6-21-2008 @ 5:00PM
jewelsp said...These girls are getting exactly what they wanted ATTENTION. I feel for the babies and the state, because that is who is going to wind up supporting them.
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6-21-2008 @ 5:16PM
Annie said...The school does have some serious issues but the big picture here is that there is no longer a family unit. Parents are too much into themselves, running here and there and are horribly materialistic and give their kids material things instead of the security, regulations, rules, talk time, and guidance they require. It seems the rule now is.....give the kid a game boy, a computer, a DVD player, etc......to keep them quiet and out of the parents' way. A child needs rules and guidance and affections, hugging, a kiss goodbye when they leave the house and they need to hear, "be careful, I love you". NOT..."take your cell phone and pick something up at McDonalds for dinner, I am working late." It is hard to be a parent and you have to be strong and steady because you have to stand firm about teaching responsibility and how to do household chores...to lead your child into the adult world and be able to survive.
Now the schools........OY! There should be NO NURSERIES AND CHILD CARE t the school. I think condoms should be available in the rest rooms or from the nurse. Pregnancy tests should not be handed out like a bag of chips. And, the school should have picked up on this serious serious matter sooner than this and I APPLAUD THE TWO THT RESIGNED IN PROTEST. They see the sitution for what it is. Bottom Line: Be a parent. Hug your child, talk openly and without attacking your child; stop buying and making material things the most important part of your child's life; spend family time each week with your child; Play cards, do a puzzle, turn all phones off, tv, computer, etc. and let the family have a good hour or two of just US TIME. I do it and it works. Being a parent is BRUTAL. But once you are a parent, there is not going back so do it right. You are in for a bumpy ride but it comes with lots of love.
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6-21-2008 @ 5:24PM
cleo said...Not only haven't the fathers of these poor babies been mentioned in the story, but I'm wondering how many of these girls even know who the father of their baby is? If they were that desperate to get pregnant, who knows if they were keeping track or just having sex to get the "two blue lines." This whole story saddens and sickens me. The girls are certainly in for a harsh reality check sooner than they think.
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6-21-2008 @ 5:31PM
sharon said...Kids having kids. Kids having access to birth control. "Something is seriously wrong with this society." All of this stems from the lack of parenting and the lack of morals in this society. It all goes back to the 60's and the "keep your nose out of my business cause I'll do what I want, when I want..." generation. They raised their kids out of church so they wouldn't force on them the morals and ethics they ignored. They had babies and when the babies proved to need them, they hired nannies, or daycare or just left them to raise themselves. This generation calls 24 year olds "children" and refuses to let them grow up and yet everyone's shocked when 17 year olds want babies. When a parent doesn't care enough to explain to their child what all goes into having a baby, then all the child sees is the romanticism of having a baby. My generation (I'm 38) has faced more divorced parents than any other. Kids do not know how to have relationships because they haven't been shown. If times get tough, parents divorce - if they were even married in the first place. Birth control will not help these situations. The cause behind these situations goes way deeper than kids having sex and getting pregnant on purpose. That's what the focus needs to be.
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6-21-2008 @ 5:25PM
foreveryoung said...i think its nice the community is willing 2 reach out and help young mothers and if they want this responsability thats their choice honestly its nice to have some one love u unconditionaly yes its har to raise a baby and juggle school but its possable :]
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6-21-2008 @ 5:34PM
Candice said...Sometimes I wonder what people be thinking sometimes before they speak. I read this story over and over about 3 times. What I don't understand is why people are making a big fuss over the two officials that tried to give birth control pills away. Ok people think a minute here, when you go to planned parenthood clinics you get birth control,condoms,contraceptive foams and a number of other things, not to mention kids go in clinics everyday getting tested for stds, the ones unfortunate to have an std has to get the antibiotic to cure the std if it is curable. and guess what they get this PRESCRIPTION drug without the parents knowing. So parents the ones who were upset with the officials what do u say about that. What I think and this is solely my opinion, the parents got upset because this is a school setting and it didn't seem right for and eduacational place giving away these things. The two officials are the same type of people that are at planned parenthood some went through the same training and learned the same things. So again I ask what makes what they tried to do different it doesn't just the location where they tried to do it at. Grow up people things have changed and times have too girls everyday are getting pregnant. My cuzin was 13 when she had her first child. We didn't judge her but we didn't make it easy for her either. So what I'm saying is perhaps people shouldn't get upset with people who tried to help not saying it would have help but it nevr hurts to try if it can improve something. One thing I am clear on though is neither the school nor the parents were doing things right that these children thought that having a baby would give them a position to feel loved. This is a feeling that u supposed to aquire from home, parents, friends and sometimes the community. but here they thought that a baby would provide the love that they wanted hence stating what I said they were not receiving that UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AT HOME.
I am 22 years old now I have no children, What I can say though is that I had unconditional love at home and I was taught about some things that I would experience in the world. I even had the take home baby when I was in high school. Bottom line is no matter what u instill into ur children they still have their on mind and is going to do what they want, but if they never had the chance to have it instilled in them than no wonder girls think it is alright to make a PACT and have kids not accidently have a baby PREMEDITATE it. I am not judging anyone and these are my own opinions but u have to see a situation from all sides, which is the kids side the parents side and for what it really is.
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6-21-2008 @ 5:37PM
L said...So the Medical Director and the School Nurse, who advocated giving out condoms to the students, "have no right to decide this for our children". So where are the people that DO have the right - the parents???Where are the parents telling these girls, "you don't want to do this at your age", "finish your education", "think of your future and the future you can give a child". Children learn what they live and if the parents don't care - neither will they!!!
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6-21-2008 @ 5:36PM
vivaciousvamp said...Everyone is placing blame on the girls. I thought it still took two to make a baby. So why weren't the boys wearing condoms? Did they know about the pact or were they just dumb enough to believe the girls that said they were on birth control. So now these young boys have to pay child support because a bunch of girls decided they were going to all get pregnant together. What a shame!!!! I think all schools should hand out bc, especially those that want to preach abstenance. All abstenance does is promote STD's and pregnancy. An uninformed child is an ignorant child
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6-21-2008 @ 5:47PM
beverly c said...i grew up with kids having kids and let me tell ya it was hard then but today the world has given these kids to open things; birth control, day care and such; these kids need to stop and think of all the stuff that they will be going thru; how it will affect their lives, education and such.. how will they take care of the child.. the fathers; will they be there? or will they be dead beat.. kids stop and think
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6-21-2008 @ 6:07PM
Rita said...I was a teen mom. I was an honor student who met up with a very handsome and popular con artist. At that time, no way was a pregnant girl going to stay in school. However, I did get my GED and with my mom watching my daughter, I received my BS. My daughter saw the sacrifices I made to make sure she had what she needed. She thanked me by being an honor student who has gone on to get her BS, MA, and is currently working on her PhD. I remained single until my daughter was a junior in high school. I have since had two more children. It still isn't easy to raise children and it is always a struggle financially for us. However, I feel that my oldest's upbringing has made her a more giving and sensible person. She wants children of her own, but only after she finishes her education and gets established. By the way, her purpose for getting this level of education is to make sure that the finances will be available for her siblings college education. Yes, like these young girls, my daughter gave unconditional love and still does, but if I could change history, I would have waited to have her and been able to give her more. I wish these girls the best of luck. Hopefully, their parents or the parents of the fathers will support them.
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6-21-2008 @ 6:06PM
Mac said...It's not just the schools. They should support the kids,despite making it easy. In the 60's girls didn't get support & that didnt stop teen pregnacies. Education does. Sex, birth and high school education. Additionally, adults regularly are getting pregnant without consequences too. Athletes, their girl friends. One star in Denver basketball has been engaged for 1 maybe two pregnancies. Movie stars. Other role models. Not saying we need to send the girls away to a "home", but no one takes responsiblity any more OR expects responsible behavior.
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6-21-2008 @ 7:04PM
teltech54 said...No way I would want my 16 yo daughter to come home with a baby. I'm only 53. Way too young to be a grandfather.
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6-22-2008 @ 2:50PM
Danielle said...I've been reading some of the comments from women who were young mothers at 17 and 18 and 19, and although that is extremely young, not one of the seventeen pregnant girls is over 16. 16!! I'm 16, and although i want loads of children i could never imagine the hardships of having a child now. I just pray that these girls get the love they think an infant will give them.
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