My husband was flying solo on parenting duty over the weekend while I was out of town for a few days, and I could tell he was experiencing the extreme up-and-down nature of staying home with two small children. During one phone call he'd exult about their morning trip to the blueberry farm and the cute things our toddler had done, an hour later I'd receive a text message from him reading "SOLD 1 CHILD. OTHER HAS NOT MET $5 RESERVE PRICE YET. RUNNING AWAY AND NEVER COMING BACK, GOODBYE."

In my absence JB decided to stop swaddling the baby at night and upon my return he smugly informed me that Dylan had not only gone to sleep just fine without his Miracle Blanket, but he slept all the way until 5 AM. I thought, well doesn't that just figure that the baby starts sleeping through the night while I'm gone, but after my first night home when Dylan sounded off at 1:30 AM -- having turned his unswaddled body sideways in the crib and smashed the top of his head against the bars -- I couldn't help but notice that my husband snored peacefully while I came stumbling out of bed, only half-awake, my brain tuned to the sound of crying. In other words, I suspect there may have been the normal amount of night fussing, it's just that it fell upon DEAF, SLUMBERING EARS.

All in all he did just fine, of course, because my husband is a fantastic and capable dad, despite his ability to snore through wails of HALP MY FONTANEL IS PAINFULLY WEDGED AGAINST MY SLEEP-JAIL. I did however enjoy his confession that you know what, it really is better if you put a dish in the dishwasher right away instead of allowing its remnants to harden into cement over a 48 hour period. Will wonders ever cease? Next thing you know he'll realize that just because it's "only" a pee diaper, it doesn't mean it should be left on the floor; or wow, putting laundry in the basket is really pretty easy once you try it once or twice.