Potty training: Boy edition
Categories: Toddlers, Preschoolers, Resources
Having successfully survived the trials and tribulations of toilet training four boys automatically earns me the title of "Male Potty Training Expert" among new parents. However, when anyone asks how I transitioned them from raunchy diaper-fillers to super dooper potty poopers, I truthfully say I still have NO IDEA.
The terrifying thing I learned early on about potty training is that you cannot force a kid to do it, it has to be their own decision. (If a kid figures this out too early in the game, you are SCREWED, by the way.)
Here are a few potty training tips that seemed to work in our household:
- Don't waste money on a potty chair. Instead, get a little step stool and show your little guy how to climb up on seat of the regular toilet, facing the tank to get the job done. It's much harder for little bums to accidentally fall in when positioned this way AND allows the child a better view of the jet-stream action.
- Never underestimate the excitement of being allowed to pee on a target! Throw in a few Cheerios to encourage a reluctant wee-er. (A word of caution: If you're not vigilant or clear on the rules of engagement, you might find other, less flush-able objects tossed in the commode. ASK ME HOW I KNOW!)
- There are books and DVDS about potty training that are helpful in getting the idea of toilet training across. "Everyone Poops" and "Once Upon a Potty" were well-read favorites among my boys and "It's Potty Time" video is annoying as all get out, but does have some of the best potty training lyrics EVER.
For example:
"He is a super dooper pooper, he can potty with the best! No more diapers to get in his way, we are really impressed!"
"Wipe, wipe, wipe yourself always front to back! Carefully, carefully, now you have the knack!"
"On top of your potty, you're sitting to poop. Life is so much sweeter,
when your diapers don't droop."
(Caution, I haven't seen this video for nearly 4 years, YET I STILL KNOW THE WORDS TO EVERY SONG.) ((Also, it contains a freaky clown and everything involving freaky clowns should come with a warning label, yet doesn't for some reason.)) - This is one of the few areas of parenthood where I found bribery to be acceptable. Actually, it's less "bribery" and "payment for poops rendered." If I'm asking the child to leave whatever they were doing to sit on the toilet rather than just going in a diaper uninterrupted, I think that's worthy of a treat. It might just be ONE M&M or mini marshmallow from in the sacred "Potty Treats" jar, but that was enough of an incentive to get them out of diapers entirely, eventually.
Do you have boy toilet training tips or tales to share?
Recent Posts
- Weekend Fun and Games (7/03/2009)
- Kids and Extracurriculars - When Do You Let Them Quit? (7/03/2009)
- Twitter Follow Friday on ParentDish! (7/03/2009)
- Lush Lashes (7/03/2009)
- Abigail Breslin Makes $13 a Week (7/03/2009)
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Jem 8-03-2008 @ 3:59PM
With my son, rewards such as candy , and potty charts did not work. He responded better to simple praise, with us telling him , "Good job!" A potty chair was very helpful for us though because for a long time my son was scared of the "big toilet". The two most helpful things that we used were a book called "The Potty Book for Boys" and going straight to underwear. I was trying to potty train him for a long time using pull-ups....and then I thought maybe the pull-ups were confusing him so I kept him in underwear. Turns out, I was right, and after I took away the pull-ups, he was potty trained within a week. (Of course , I had to watch him very carefully in just underwear, and we stayed home a lot during this time.) Also ,I took him for "potty checks" every 45 mins. or so. This isn't to say that pull-ups aren't helpful, they just didn't work for my son. After about a month, he was ready to go to the big toilet. I think the thing to remember with potty training is that every child is different, so they will respond to different techniques. Keep going once you've started even if it gets frustrating. When you start it feels like they will never learn, but they will. There's bound to be accidents , so be patient!
Reply
Krystine 8-03-2008 @ 5:29PM
When my youngest son started straining out the word "poop" as he went, we knew it was time to start potty training. The best advice I've ever gotten is from our daycare lady. We put him in training pants, the cloth ones, during the day, and used pullups for night time. If he went potty in his "big boy underwear", we'd just put him in the shower, and rinse off his bits and pieces with cold water. He only went in his undies 3 or 4 times. It took literally 2 days. I wish someone had told me that with my first two.
Reply
Heather 8-03-2008 @ 7:04PM
NO PULL UPS! Just get reg underwear and yes they will have accidents. Usually after the 3rd day they get better. They will whine and cry so make sure all adults participate and don't ignore the signs they have to go.
Reply
Jillian 8-03-2008 @ 9:02PM
For the two boys I've actively helped potty-train we had to go straight from diaper to no underwear/pull-up - just pants. We found that if the boys had underwear on, it felt snug like a diaper, so they had accidents. No underwear = no accidents for us. After they had a bit more control they were able to wear underwear.
Reply
Raj 8-04-2008 @ 8:41AM
What I found that worked with my little man was keeping it novel enough to get to the point where it was just the normal thing to do. It started out with sitting on the potty seat for awhile as Mommy and Daddy were getting ready in the morning. From there, it grew into getting the occasional treat to getting a stepstool to standing in front of the potty and now, in acceptable situations, peeing on a tree outside. This way it never became a battle.. it just remained fun.
Reply
Jamie 8-04-2008 @ 3:13PM
We did better just after my son's third birthday. No underwear worked better for us. I had put him in underwear and he asked me to change his diaper when he had an accident. We let him run naked for a day and we were done! No diapers during the day and a pull-up at night.
Reply
Justin 8-04-2008 @ 6:25PM
Sorry but I'm nearly crying I'm rolling laughing so hard at your absolutely perfect description of the art of potty training boys. Seriously I believe it's some obscure art form that require the use of "Potty Whisperers" Hehehe!
I'm lucky enough to have that talent too and god almighty I've been asked millions of times how I managed to pull off it off, and again my reaction is "I dunno, I just did I guess".
Best tactic of all times I can attest to, is turn it into a game... The more sneaky, tacticle, warlike... the BETTER. Get out the cheerios... Set up your targets! Rubber duck as your second officer, and toilet paper in hand! Pick your weapon of choice and have at it! There's the classic machine gun fire (Watch that aim now!) or decide that you've had enough and want to drop a bomb on them all!
I know it sounds so dumb and silly (And honestly violent-ish) it works every time and usually leaves everyone in tears laughing and wanting to do it again and again. Turn it into a game, make it an adventure, come up with the prizes, and in the end sink those cheerios!!!
Hahahaha!
Reply
Shane Shaps 8-04-2008 @ 8:33PM
Thanks for all the advice...two years ago I went through potty training nightmares with my daughter and now my son is gearing up for his turn - and I'm terrified. Glad to have some good (and some silly) advice. Thanks!
Reply
Jenni 8-04-2008 @ 10:28PM
Here's a note to all: pull ups are expensive diapers. Yes, children have accidents and they make our lives easier; however, have you noticed that diaper companies are finding ways to keep our children in diapers longer and longer? A child can go all the way to 8 years old in diapers now! They go from regular diapers to pull-ups to goodnights and now they have underjammers. These are for those children who don't want their diapers to be showing above their pajama bottoms at a sleepover.
Before anyone knocks me for the insecurity a child who wets the bed feels let me tell you: I had a friend, my best friend to this day, from the time I was in preschool. We had more sleepovers than I can count. She had a huge bed wetting problem. Wet the bed all the way through high school. It was a medical condition. She never felt bad about wetting the bed (or sleeping bag) at sleepovers becuase no one made her feel bad about it (myself or our other friends). Are all children like this? No. But not a single one of us would make her feel bad about it because we understood that she couldn't control it.
Having these options does make it nice for the special needs children (and their parents) and I do think that they should and need to make use of them. However, once a child begins to potty train, put them in underwear.
Reply
Wendy Ragiste 8-05-2008 @ 5:11PM
It took over a year to train mine. He was well capable of it but just didn't want to.
Reply
Jessica 8-06-2008 @ 12:06PM
Dr. Pete Stavinoha, a child psychologist at Children's Medical Center in Dallas, Texas, suggests in his book Stress-Free Potty Training, that each child potty trains differently, and according to his personality. Dr. Pete offers specific tips for for training a goal-directed child or a strong-willed child, an internalizer or an impulsive kiddo, male or female. Watch a video of Dr. Pete here: www.childrens.com/Media/video/Potty-Training.cfm or read more about his book at www.stressfreepottytraining.com.
Good luck!
Reply