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First graders go on field trip to teacher's same sex wedding
Filed under: In The News, Day Care & Education, Sex
When San Francisco first graders took a special field trip to surprise their beloved teacher at her wedding, they learned a few things about marriage. "Marriage is people falling in love" said one student, "You stay with someone the rest of your life."
So why, then, are people protesting the field trip? Because the person that the teacher married was another woman.
People who support Proposal 8 -- which would ban same sex marriage in California -- are using the field trip as "an example" of how kids would learn about same sex marriage in school if the measure doesn't pass. But school administrators and most of the classroom parents approved of the field trip, saying it was a "teachable moment" and an opportunity to make memories. Two parents opted out of the trip, and their children stayed behind with another first grade class.
As a teacher who frequently had to justify my field trips to school administrators, I think this is a gray area, but not because of the gender of the people getting married. Is a wedding an appropriate learning experience for a first grader? As a member of a community, yes. As a school child, I'm not so sure, though the kids did get to take a city bus and visit City Hall, so there's that.
But as a parent, I probably would have let my child go. An hour and a half out of their day to share such an important occasion with a beloved teacher is worth the lost class time. What do you think?
| Yes. It's a beautiful moment for them to share. | |
|---|---|
| No, because it's not educational. | |
| No, because I don't support same sex marriage. | |
| Other -- share with us in comments. |
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ReaderComments (Page 5 of 45)
10-14-2008 @ 11:18AM
Paul Cyopick said...I think it's quite normal to show children that when people fall in love they may get married. Just because this is a unique wedding does not make it abnormal. The earlier children learn tolerance and acceptance of all people the better.
Lots of children these days have step moms an dads, or like my children, have only one parent. Stop trying to pretend the "Beaver Cleaver" good old days still exists (they never did anyways), and let the children learn that everyone deserves to love and be loved.
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10-15-2008 @ 7:28AM
Marmar said...It doesn't belong in a first graders classroom. If the teacher wanted them there then send an invitation. It was purposely done this way to further an agenda but we who are against it get critizied or called racist.
10-15-2008 @ 9:06AM
La'Shawn said...Paul you say that it is ok to teach children about this because they learn tolerance at an early age, but what about the rights of the PARENTS? The reason children have parents is so that they can be protected cared for and taught, since when does a school have the right to take the law into their own hands and violate a parents rights? The question here is not whether or not gay marriage is ok, but rather does a school system who is funded by the people and governed by the people have the right to make a decision like this without the parents consent. Furthure more just as people who choose to live alternate lifestyles feel they have the right to choose and do not want other peoples views forced upon them, the same is true for people who do not believe that an alternate lifestyle is ok. By gays forcing their lifestyles upon others, or by trying to make people except their lifestyle, aren't they infact doing to others exactly what they do not want done to them? Everyone should have the right to choose, and sometimes we have to agree to disagree.
One of the wonderful things I love about this great country we live in is that we have freedom of speech and the right to our own opinion!!! With that being said nothing is ever black and white we will always have those gray areas.
10-15-2008 @ 9:54AM
Deena said...As far as the field trip is concerned....it was wrong. It should have been an after hours event.
In response to Elyisa,
You are right.....the bible teaches love and as Christians we are not to judge but love as Christ loves. But Molly is right, our country was built on faith and God...we need to remember that.
the following is compliments of intouch.org by Charles Stanley:
"Marriage was not invented by modern secular philosophy. Marriage was not invented by contemporary science. It certainly was not invented by four Supreme Court justices in Massachusetts," writes Michael Novak. "Although the 50 American states regulate the legal standing of marriages, in most cases marriages are presided over by church authorities, not state authorities. Moreover, the understanding of what marriage constitutes is largely outside the state's purview. It is left for the most part to the contracting parties and to the presiding churches. Even in its barest legal minimum, matrimony is deeply influenced by the long traditions of Judaism and Christianity."1
The Bible strongly denounces homosexuality in verses like Leviticus 18:22, which reads: "You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination." In contrast, Scripture presents marriage as a heterosexual relationship. Song of Solomon offers a compelling portrait of marriage in which the two parties are clearly male and female. Jesus also spoke of God's design for marriage: "But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. And for this reason a man will leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate" (Mark 10:6-9).
But the cause of today's diluted version of marriage reaches beyond the homosexual lobby to other powerful forces such as the expansive marketplace—same-sex marriage is part of a greater historical context. We should not, therefore, scapegoat homosexuals as the sole party responsible for crumbling marriages when evangelicals are equally to blame. Sadly, the church claims as many broken homes, abandoned spouses, and alienated children as the secular community.
When we speak of wedlock's redefinition, we should ask ourselves, "What defines my marriage?" If matrimony is truly a reflection of God's relationship with man, a physical manifestation of our heavenly bond with our Creator, we ought to safeguard it with all our might. The wedding vow is binding. It is sacred and permanent. It is a vow of fidelity, commitment, honor, and love that was intended to last until death severs it.
We tend to forget the weight of those vows when we blame others for our country's present state of affairs. While there are measures we can take politically to preserve marriage, our best defense lies in strengthening and protecting our own unions. A strong family unit is a beacon of light in the darkness, reflecting God's glory to all who see it. How many people do you know who have been faithfully married for more than 20 years? Like seasoned athletes, they chart a course for others to follow. Until people see Christian marriages that work, they will have nothing to emulate.
10-14-2008 @ 12:04PM
Sabrina said...I voted other, but I don't think it was a good idea, in good taste, or educational in any way. I also feel it was less than the professional conduct I'd expect from an educated professional. Not to mention controversial! Anyone who has not been living under a rock for the last decade (or longer), knows that gay marriage is controversial, and that within this teacher's classroom there would be families on both sides of the debate. As a professional she should not have invited students to her wedding simply because her personal life (with men OR women) should remain personal. As an educated person she should have known that suggesting the kids should go to any personal event in her life would cause controversy, but the contoversiality and appropriateness of bringing students to this particular personal event should have been obvious to everyone. I have lived in California, and witnessed firsthand the ostrich-like hiding of heads when it comes to drawing a line between acceptance and outright looking for trouble. This was outright looking for trouble.
Honestly it depends on my feelings about the teacher in question and how well I know him/her as to whether or not I would allow my children to attend their wedding, regardless of gender roles in their marriage. I feel glad that homosexuals are permitted by the state to marry, and similarly glad that churches aren't being forced to oversee unions they as private organizations do not believe in.
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10-14-2008 @ 12:40PM
Persephone said...The teacher didn't actually invite the kids to her wedding. She didn't even know they would be coming - it was a surprise suggested and organized by parents, and the kids didn't actually crash the wedding itself but were waiting on the steps outside to blow bubbles when the newlyweds made their exit.
I would have let my child miss school to attend the wedding if invited. I also would have let my child go to something like this with school just to show support of a beloved teacher.
I'm not really sure about the educational aspect, but not everything done at school is educational - I remember a number of in class pizza parties and a few silly movie days in my own educational history. Those things still go on, and if you're going to take a break from studies for a bit, showing support of a beloved teacher seems a better use of time than watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory yet again.
My main concern is that even if the parents just intended it as a nice gesture, it will stir up trouble and hurt the cause since a lot of people will bring this up as "see, they are forcing this on the innocent impressionable children" as if they were being shown an orgy or something rather than two people making a lifelong commitment of love. A lot of people seem to be just catching the headline and missing the details that this came from the parents and that it was a special charter school where things probably work a bit differently than in a run of the mill public school.
10-14-2008 @ 12:43PM
Sabrina said...Hey, you're not wrong, I thought I read most of what was posted here, but aparently I was too tired. Sorry. My opinion stands, but at least I can take back anything said about the teacher herself! Thanks!
10-15-2008 @ 7:07AM
dawn said...we are a same sex couple & we firmly believe that how you react in any marriage weather its same sex or not is important for children to see & understand. & showing children that being of the same sex is OK. we have 4 children & 3 gchildren together & our kids think nothing of the fact that they have 2 mothers.children should learn @ a young age that it doesnt matter who you love as long as you respect the one you love 4ever
10-15-2008 @ 7:33AM
jnrjjjjkcta said...The story says the kids going to the wedding was a surprise.
10-14-2008 @ 12:40PM
isisaquaria said...Wow, another story which makes private school worth the money---The academics is actually more than enough, but stories like this just add to it.
I do not see the academic need for such a trip, a waste of public school funds (gas. bus driver etc). The subject matter is one for in home discussion.
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10-14-2008 @ 1:09PM
Jenni said...Right on! This has NOTHING to do with where you stand on a political issue and EVERYTHING to do with what should be happening at a school:
Reading, writing, arithmatic
Leave the teaching of personal moral and ethical beliefs to the parents (even the ones who don't choose to teach those things at home).
10-14-2008 @ 1:20PM
Nicola said...First, it wasn't really a class "field trip". The parents organized it and they rode the public bus. The teacher was in no way involved.
Second, I just find it hilarious that one of the people who is criticizing academics goes on to misspell the word "arithmetic". Not a leg to stand on.
10-15-2008 @ 8:48AM
WELLEN said...This was nothing more than a political statement using children and NOT an educational experience. Anything wrong with visiting a museum? What a spineless attempt at advancing one's own views on impressionable children.
10-14-2008 @ 12:49PM
nia said...What kind of ''field trip'' is that?
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10-14-2008 @ 1:19PM
Maureen said...I don't support Prop 8, but I also wouldn't approve of this field trip. I might let my child attend, but I would have voiced my opinion that I don't think a field trip to any sort of wedding during school hours is appropriate. When people are screaming that kids don't have enough time/money for art, pe or other similar programs because of no child left behind, I find it crazy that the school is sending kids on a field trip like this.
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10-15-2008 @ 11:53AM
Samantha said...Seriously, do you believe half the field trips taken in school are as educational as they should be? I remember taking a field trip to the zoo we we're quizzed about the animals later or anything it was merely a sighht show, what about senior class trips as well? And how about parties for the holidays? They're not educational.
10-14-2008 @ 1:42PM
Kate said...I would opt out of this field trip no question about it. If my child asked questions I would explain enough for a first grader to understand, otherwise we would just have a mommy and kiddo day.
I do not judge the two women for their union or other parents for allowing their children to attend.
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10-14-2008 @ 1:53PM
Kate said...I also consider it poor etiquette to crash a wedding without being invited. I think etiquette is seriously lacking in today's youth who feel entitled to pretty much everything.
The other day I saw a mother thanking her child for saying thank you after being given a cookie.
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10-14-2008 @ 2:57PM
str said...I was a fourth or fifth grader (can't remember) when we were taken to our teacher's wedding. Bride and groom. Nothing special genderwise. And I think it was a bad move. School kids can make ANY wedding awkward. I know that if I were a teacher I wouldn't want my students at my wedding. No matter the gender of the partner. It's just too weird.
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10-14-2008 @ 2:59PM
str said......and might I add we, too, were not invited. To this day I think it must have been some kind of a revenge on the part of the other teachers who didn't like this guy very much (but we did!).
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