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Pacifiers - Saying goodbye is never easy

Filed under: Babies, Toddlers Preschoolers, Preschoolers, Feeding & Sleeping

pacifierPacifiers are both a godsend and a major pain in the you-know-what. They magically soothe babies and put them to sleep, but when it comes time for a toddler to say goodbye to their beloved "nukie," it's torture for everyone.

We're going through that right now. Though many experts recommend waiting for kids to give up the pacifier on their own, our pediatric dentist has told us we really can't wait much longer or we'll risk permanent damage to her teeth. And so we've chosen this week to buckle down and do it ... which may explain why I tried to go the grocery store yesterday with two different shoes on. Sleep is definitely at a shortage around here right now.

If it's time for your toddler or preschooler to say goodbye to her beloved pacifier, here are a few things I've learned:



  • After age one, most experts recommend that pacifiers only be used at bedtime. We implemented a "paci stays in the crib" rule around 18 months.
  • Take it slow. A pacifier is a comfort object, and simply going cold turkey can be traumatic. Prepare your child ahead of time by telling them what you plan to do.
  • Consider a goodbye ritual. You could put the pacifiers in a gift bag to give to another baby, or tie them to a helium balloon for a grander send-off. Be warned, though, this did not work for us. My daughter panicked at the idea of actually "saying goodbye" to her pacifiers, so instead we put them in a box on my dresser. She's comforted by the fact that they are there, even if she's not using them.
  • Consider letting them trade-up for a big girl/boy toy. Our daughter got a special new baby doll the day after she said goodbye to her pacifiers. It doesn't make bedtime any easier, but it helped take the sting off.
  • Stay firm. Honestly, I think I miss the pacifiers almost as much as she does. That first night was hard, and it was tempting to give in. But I can't expect her to be tough if I'm not.
  • Pick a week when you'll have some help. I specifically chose this week because my husband is on vacation, so at bedtime I can focus solely on my three-year-old.
  • One website admonished me for laying with my daughter until she fell asleep, that I was basically trading one comfort object for another (myself). But this was already part of our bedtime routine. Not only does it give her comfort, it eliminates her popping out of bed every three minutes because she can't sleep.
We're on night number four, and as she learns new ways to comfort herself to sleep, it's getting easier. Have you had to wean a child off of a pacifier? What worked for you?

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.