Single Dad Shunned at Swimming Pool
Categories: Preschoolers, Health & safety, Single parenting
Certainly, Phillip Smith's two sons, five-year-old Jake and three-year-old Aiden need to be supervised when in a swimming pool. How much supervision they require depends upon a number of factors: their familiarity with and abilities in the water, the type and depth of the pool, and the aquatic abilities of those doing the supervising. Given that Smith is a firefighter and that the pool in question features a pirate ship with slides and what appears to be fairly shallow water, I would say that Smith could probably take care of both kids by himself.He thought so too, but Hillsborough Leisure Centre in Sheffield, UK, disagreed and turned him away. "As a fireman, I'm highly trained and expected to be able to provide first aid at emergencies," said Smith. "To say I cannot cope with looking after my two sons at a swimming pool is just mad." The center maintains a strict one-to-one policy for children under the age of eight and refused to admit them. "I discussed the situation at length with the duty manager," fumed Smith, adding that "the manager refused to do anything but hide behind policy."
Now I understand the center's desire for safety, but it seems to me that their policy might just be a little over the top. If they are having to turn away parents who feel there is no need for such concern, there might just be something wrong with the way they are doing things. One obvious (albeit expensive) solution would be to add more staff. Another is to allow parents to take responsibility for their own children's safety.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Amy 1-09-2009 @ 10:11AM
Maybe, if dad doesn't like the policy, he should just use another pool. Seems like such a simple solution ::rolleyes:: In this day of "Stub your toe? Let's sue!!!" I don't blame the pool one bit for the CYA.
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Jenni 1-09-2009 @ 10:12AM
The title to this article is very misleading. This isn't a problem for a single dad, this is the center's policy. Whether that policy be a good or bad one; it has nothing to do with the man's marital status.
Maybe they should change the policy, but with so many law suits out there, I can see why they would be hesitant to do things any differently. This is the result of a society that doesn't want to take responsibility for their actions.
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Jenn D 1-09-2009 @ 11:03AM
I have to agree with the other folks who've already commented. This has nothing to do with the fact that he was a dad, or a single dad. The same thing would have happened to a single mother, or a married mother who showed up by herself.
The fact is that rules are rules. In my opinion, as a firefighter, this man should know that not all rules make sense, but the majority of them are there for a reason. Not only would the pool be liable if something happened, but if they let him in with two kids, then the rule means nothing at all.
Good for the manager for standing his ground in this case.
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mike 1-09-2009 @ 2:54PM
I have to agree with with Jenn D rules are rules they may not always make sense but they are there for a reason. Sometimes to protect the patron sometimes to protect the facility.
My opinion that nothing good would come of it, maybe the "single dad" should call a lawyer, except the lawyer would make some $.
ninainindia 1-09-2009 @ 11:49AM
Yes but this rule means that as a single parent you cannot go to the pool. Going to the pool is not that easy for everyone. Where I live there is only one pool.
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Eddie 1-09-2009 @ 12:00PM
people...people....people...
of course, the title is misleading...how else did we all end up clicking on it? it's meant to be "catchy" by nature of this news business.
so it can claim "gotcha!"
as for the real story, consider these:
just because you have the right (hiding behind the policy as it was stated), does not mean you are right...in an intersection, with 4 stop signs, when 2 cars seemingly get to their respective lanes, the one on the right has the right of way...if both goes on at the same time, you will have a collision...the one on the right had the right of way...but is the driver right? no way! defensive driving and safety first kick in to the scene. ;the acting senior staff should have tried to refer to even higher ups or to the highest from his end to advance the dad's case for admittance. perhaps then, someone with the "can do" authority can step in and require to photocopy some kind of firefighter identification and to sign some kind of waiver dismissing the facility of reasonable liability.
in the terms of the dad, what is it about his mentality that if there is a serious roadblock/obstacle/immovable object, what's wrong with "not shooting the messenger" who was just doing his job. more people needed to this kind of "just do your job" and perhaps we would not be in this descending financial quagmire that we are all to be blamed with differing "percentages of blame." if i felt that my case had so many merits clearly outweighing the negatives, i would have pursued the matter (without fuming) to the next level of authority. this have produced a lot of success with me in the past.
at any rate, the dad was not prevented from swimming with his kids...just prevented from that specific site and that specific time period of his day. people...people...people...applaud workers that do their jobs! learn to deal with issues at times by simply "going around" the blockade to avoid "truly unnecessary" and "moot" conflicts. can you imagine this same dad continuing to behave in this "fuming manner" infront of his sons when they're even older as they further absorb his examples...hmmm...future of our society.
You must learn about yourself.
You must learn about others.
You must learn about other living things.
You must learn about the world we live in.
With true learning comes understanding.
With true understanding comes respect and love.
With respect and love come INNER PEACE.
With inner peace comes OUTER PEACE.
(I wonder if both parties involved just had INNER PEACE within themselves...how would OUTER PEACE changed or not changed the outcome? Happy New Year, everyone!
kinderthisyear at yahoo
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SKL 1-09-2009 @ 12:15PM
I completely agree with the pool managers on this. First of all, we're talking about preschoolers and water. Drowning deaths are hardly rare among young children. It would be completely irresponsible to NOT have a rule like this. How are they supposed to know which parents are and aren't capable of protecting multiple preschoolers in the pool? Sure, you say let the parents decide; but then you have to be in favor of the pool having absolutely no liability. And even if that were the case, how can you expect them to risk having a drowned child in their pool, lawsuit or not?
I am the single mother of two little girls. I would never take them to a pool unless I had a second adult so that each child has an adult in charge of her 100% of the time. I have my kids in gymnastics class, which again has a potential for injury, though not as significant as drowning. I bring another adult - yeah, that's right, I pay money to make sure my kids are safe. That is my responsibility as a parent.
He has other options. One, pay someone to come along. Two, buy his own pool. Three, go to a beach where he can do whatever he pleases. Four, find something safer to do with two kids. It's not up to the pool to figure out his childcare issues.
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Renee 1-09-2009 @ 12:26PM
I agree with others that the title is misleading. I was expecting to read about some poor single Dad who got run off from the public pool by some Mean Girl mommies. I think the pool rule is stupid, but rules are rules. The dad shouldn't have tried to debate it, but just left. There's stupid rules virtually everywhere nowadays.
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Karen 1-09-2009 @ 12:56PM
If the dad needed to go in and help the 3-yr-old, that would leave the 5-yr-old without supervision for a not-insignificant amount of time. It doesn't take long for a kid to get hurt, whatever training the parents have. Coincidentally, I almost drowned when I was 3 and again when I was nearly 5, and both times I survived only because my mother was right there to rescue me. If we hadn't had other relatives there, my sister, only a year older, would have been unsupervised in a dangerous environment. SKL has some great points, and I agree with her (and the pool management) completely -- each kid needs an adult supervisor.
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doubltroubl7174 1-09-2009 @ 1:38PM
Okay, I agree..to a point. However, people like AMY who commented with the maturity of a friggen child? I don't agree with. First of all, that father never said anything about sueing. Second of all, he simply felt he could handle the challenge because he is trained in first aid and CPR. They put ONE lifeguard in charge of a bunch of kids...I say yeah, bring someone along with you so both of the kids can swim, however I don't think he was wrong in feeling frustrated.
As for you AMY, don't comment on a board if you cant be adult about it. It is DISGUSTING to see such BS on a parenting message board. If you can't comment maturely about something then KEEP UR COMMENTS TO YOURSELF.
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Amy 1-09-2009 @ 3:20PM
"UR" "kidden", right?
Pools have to put rules in place, so they aren't open to liability. One parent can watch ONE child - a total CYA move. This rule was IN NO WAY discriminatory towards this single father as the article title would have you believe. I'm a single mom, with a PhD (smirk), so I feel I can watch my two kids at the pool too. Maybe I have SIX kids, and I "feel" I can watch them all. Not gonna make change its rule. The rule is in place so children don't DIE.
I think it's DISGUSTING that some people can't spell. Keep "UR" improperly spelled comments to URSELF.
Oh wait, this is the internet. Carry on.
Sandyone 1-09-2009 @ 5:02PM
When I lived in the UK, they had this policy and it did keep my kids from swimming. It stunk, but them's the rules. Firefighter Dad is missing the point that we don't ever want to get to the point where his professional skills are required.
I think, but I'm not sure, that you could work with the pool if one or both of your under-8s were decent swimmers.
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Amy 1-10-2009 @ 10:31AM
and your title is a bit misleading, trying to make it seem like dad was shunned for being single. Title SHOULD read - "Dad shows up at pool with two kids, even though there is a one-on-one policy, and has hissy fit because he's a fire fighter." Geez people, back to grade school. Follow the stinkin' rules, please.
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