Facebook - Does it Make You a Bad Mom?

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Being a stay-at-home mom is fulfilling in countless ways, but let's face it ... it's not the most intellectually stimulating job around. And sometimes, it can be downright isolating. I believe that's why blogging and social networking are both so popular among SAHMs (and SAHDs).

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Finally, someone to talk to -- during the day no less. No more calling working friends while they're juggling emails and conferences, or at night when they're trying to spend some time with their own kids. As for some real-live company from someone who doesn't call you "Mama," many at-homers don't have friends and family nearby.

Over at BoMoms, though, they're asking the question: Does Facebook make you a bad mom? Facebook (and Twitter and other social networking sites) are different than other hobbies in that they're there all the time, always on, always a temptation. Oh, they can be addicting, too.

Are we spending time staring at our laptops, sending virtual plants to go in friends' virtual gardens, rather than caring for our kids like we should be?

I've been known to tune out my kids on a rainy Sunday afternoon and cozy up with my laptop, it's true. But I think even the fact that we're mulling over this question says something about the way we still, even after all these years, view mothers.

No one is asking if golf or a persistent love for the NBA make men bad fathers, yet both of those activities pull them away from their kids for a few hours every week. It reminds me of that playgroup cocktail issue that came up a while back. Moms sipping wine in front of their kids is bad, but dads can drink an after-dinner beer without anyone complaining.

I was a stay-at-home mom for three years, and now work from home part-time. I am utterly and completely devoted to my kids, but I am also a person and a woman in my own right. I don't and shouldn't spend every minute of the day with my kids.

If Facebook or another social networking site are your only means of adult conversation or humor during the day, and if you can enjoy it without abusing it, then is it really different than any other hobby? What do you think?

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.