Pro-Choice Women Taken to Task Over Miscarriage Grief

Filed under: In The News

sad womanWomen who support the right to choose have no right to grieve for pregnancies that end in miscarriage -- so says a Momlogic guest blogger named Gina, who takes pro-lifers to task for their "hysterics" over first-trimester pregnancy loss.

Gina asserts that pro-choice advocates who "ridicule" pro-lifers as backward religious fanatics have no right to be upset when they miscarry. She writes: "Like vegetarians who eat chicken but not beef, many pro-choice advocates want it both ways. It's a baby when they want it to be, it's a bundle of cells when they don't."

She goes on to say that "it's ridiculous to break down in hysterics, set up a memorial website for your "angel," and seek out a grief counselor when you start bleeding in your first trimester. After all, you're simply talking about the loss of a conglomeration of microscopic cells, right?! That's hardly something to cry about."

This is one of most hateful, spiteful pieces of writing I've seen in a very, very long time. Here's why:
Asserting that women who believe in reproductive rights are pro-abortion is not only simplistic, it is cowardly. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that pro-choice advocates are very uncomfortable with the notion of terminating a healthy pregnancy.

Miscarriage is exactly that -- the termination of a healthy pregnancy. However, the woman who suffers fetal loss has absolutely no control over what is happening to her body. She grieves for the loss of her hopes and her dreams, for the loss of what could have been -- even if she believes intellectually that all she lost was "a clump of cells."

I get a good look at the abortion debate every time I go see my OB/GYN. The doctor I see is also an open reproductive-rights proponent, and she runs an abortion clinic alongside her medical practice. The faces of the young women -- and they are almost always young, these women -- are not joyful. These are faces in mourning, too, for what could have been and what should have been.

Much like the women whose planned pregnancies end in miscarriage, the women who choose termination will live with the loss for the rest of their lives.

Facile arguments like the one made by Gina only serve to fan the flames of hatred, and smack of small-minded stupidity. They also help prove the chauvinists right -- that women are a bunch of vindictive idiots.

So much for compassionate conservatism, eh?

Does pro-choice mean pro-abortion? Do women who support reproductive freedom have the right to grieve for lost pregnancies?

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.