Hot on HuffPost Parents:
North Dakota Yoga Teacher Marries Herself
Erin Mantz: I Want to Talk to My Kids About Etan Patz -- But I Don't…
Pro-Choice Women Taken to Task Over Miscarriage Grief
Filed under: In The News
Women who support the right to choose have no right to grieve for pregnancies that end in miscarriage -- so says a Momlogic guest blogger named Gina, who takes pro-lifers to task for their "hysterics" over first-trimester pregnancy loss.Gina asserts that pro-choice advocates who "ridicule" pro-lifers as backward religious fanatics have no right to be upset when they miscarry. She writes: "Like vegetarians who eat chicken but not beef, many pro-choice advocates want it both ways. It's a baby when they want it to be, it's a bundle of cells when they don't."
She goes on to say that "it's ridiculous to break down in hysterics, set up a memorial website for your "angel," and seek out a grief counselor when you start bleeding in your first trimester. After all, you're simply talking about the loss of a conglomeration of microscopic cells, right?! That's hardly something to cry about."
This is one of most hateful, spiteful pieces of writing I've seen in a very, very long time. Here's why:
Asserting that women who believe in reproductive rights are pro-abortion is not only simplistic, it is cowardly. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that pro-choice advocates are very uncomfortable with the notion of terminating a healthy pregnancy.
Miscarriage is exactly that -- the termination of a healthy pregnancy. However, the woman who suffers fetal loss has absolutely no control over what is happening to her body. She grieves for the loss of her hopes and her dreams, for the loss of what could have been -- even if she believes intellectually that all she lost was "a clump of cells."
I get a good look at the abortion debate every time I go see my OB/GYN. The doctor I see is also an open reproductive-rights proponent, and she runs an abortion clinic alongside her medical practice. The faces of the young women -- and they are almost always young, these women -- are not joyful. These are faces in mourning, too, for what could have been and what should have been.
Much like the women whose planned pregnancies end in miscarriage, the women who choose termination will live with the loss for the rest of their lives.
Facile arguments like the one made by Gina only serve to fan the flames of hatred, and smack of small-minded stupidity. They also help prove the chauvinists right -- that women are a bunch of vindictive idiots.
So much for compassionate conservatism, eh?
Does pro-choice mean pro-abortion? Do women who support reproductive freedom have the right to grieve for lost pregnancies?












ReaderComments (Page 2 of 2)
2-09-2009 @ 3:08AM
M. said...Ha - I'm pro-choice...for the choice to CHOOSE a contraceptive that works.
If people blieve in abortion, or even the RIGHT to abortion, then that is excepting either:
A. it IS a life and therefore you are supporting the mother to murder that life.
or
B. it isn't a life...therefore you have no reason to grieve the loss of a "clump of cells" in the way of miscarriage. if it is nothingness, then why cry over it?
If you're crying over the loss of the expectations you had for that soon-2-be child, as you would call it, then you are ust as selfish as the moether who KILLS that child, YES CHILD, because it was unexpected.
Truth is, no one who truely believes in GOD could ever abort a child. You can't say you believe in God and the miracled he performs and then call it an "unwanted" or "unexpected" pregnancy. Uh, hello?? God is the only one who knows it all. There's nothing in life you can expect except that He will care and provide for you. So if you truely believe in God, then there's nothing to expect and therefore nothing can be UNexpected.
Reply
2-09-2009 @ 7:11AM
Sandyone said...Your headline has totally missed the mark. It should read "Pro-choice Women Taken To Task Over Hypocrisy".
The whole point of this woman's article is the hypocrisy of the pro-choice position.
Bottom line....it's not a human life, so it's ok to remove it (like a tumor or a gall bladder). Or, it is a human life, so it's not ok to remove it.
So, if you're pro-choice and you grieve after a miscarriage, it means you realize that that was actually a baby inside of you (and puh-lease don't insult anyone by saying the woman grieves 'the dream') and that the baby has died.
The humanity of the fetus isn't determined by the mother's wishes and feelings. It's ridiculous to think it is.
It's either a baby or it isn't.
Intellectual honesty...check it out!
Reply
3-11-2009 @ 10:57AM
heather said...how completely ignorant. i happen to be pro-choice, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it is a choice that *i* would make. i miscarried yesterday after 11 weeks, and you'd better believe i'm greiving and i have every fucking right to do so.
way to be ignorant, though. high five to you.
Reply
4-22-2009 @ 8:37PM
kitzia moreno said...hello my name is kitzia moreno, i am doing a project on abortion and need to interview a woman whos had an abortion, agrees with abortion, and is willing to speak to me, if you can help me please contact me
Reply