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Filed under: Breast-Feeding
Breastfeeding is all over the news. There's Salma Hayek nursing the starving baby of another woman on a UNICEF fact-finding trip to Sierra Leone. Here's new mom Naomi Watts crediting her trim post-baby figure to breastfeeding: "He's sucking it all out of me." Don't overlook the Facebook dust-up, where members are posting nurse-ins in response to site's decision to ban breastfeeding photos.
Perhaps the most jarring of all reports, though, are the so-called extreme breastfeeders.
Knowing the cost, health and bonding benefits, most new moms plan to nurse for a few months, even a year. What about when that year turns to four or five, or more? It happens more than you'd think.
Mary Pennington of Durham, ME, remembered thinking that her older sister, who nursed one of her children until the age of three, was a little odd. "I didn't get it," she told ParentDish. "If you'd told me that I'd be nursing a four-and-a-half year old, I'd say 'You're crazy.' But I don't think you're prepared for the changes in what you might feel once you have a baby."
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding through the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child. "There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer."
But just 36 percent of babies in the U.S. are breastfed through six months, according to a 2008 report from Brigham Young University. For those who do practice extended nursing, the average is closer to three years. But even the most committed strain under the judging glares of family and strangers.
"Their reaction is uggh," said Robyn Paul, a lactation consultant and mom of three who was interviewed for a 20/20 story, "Breast-feeding Past Infancy." "But it's perfectly normal." When Tiernan, 6, needs comforting, he asks for "nummies." "We've had conversations about what it tastes like and he says it's very sweet," Paul said.
"Very few new moms go into pregnancy or childbirth thinking they want to breastfeed a 5-year-old," said Carrie Lauch (pictured), host of Natural Moms Talk Radio and mother of four. She just weaned her 6-year-old daughter six months ago. "But the weeks and months move on, and the benefits for the child and the mother never go away."
Many people, not surprising, believe that's both harmful and shameful. "If a mother is breastfeeding a child of 5 or 6 years old she should be arrested and prosecuted for abuse/sexual molestation/pedophilia/mental illness etc," Mike posted on FaceBook after viewing the program. "Sick. wrong."
"Everyone has their upper limits that they might think was okay, and what's unacceptable," said Pennington, who nursed her daughter Maysa until after her fifth birthday. "And each comes to that on her own. When you're outside of that situation, it might seem inconceivable. But they're still always your baby. And you're just continuing a relationship that has worked since day one. It seems very natural."
The natural length of breastfeeding for humans, according to Katherine A. Dettwyler, Ph.D., an anthropologist and leading expert on breastfeeding, lies between two-and-a-half and seven years. By that math, YouTube phenom Veronika Robinson is an outlier. Nearly 14 million of us have watched her nurse her daughter Eliza, 8.
Heated debate surrounds Pennington, Paul, Robinson and other mothers who continue to nurse outside the norm. Most rarely, if ever, do it in public and consider it a private mother-child experience. "I really feel that there is an extra bonding or attachment there that I would like to think that because he nursed until he was 6, that there was some more closeness there ... that you get when you're able to have him in your arms for a longer period of time," said Paul to 20/20. "My daughter's the same way. Very much so."
Victoria Scanlan Stefanakos is the editor of Project Homestead
Perhaps the most jarring of all reports, though, are the so-called extreme breastfeeders.
Celebrities Who Breastfed
"I'm like an alcoholic. It's like, I don't care if I cry, I don't care if I'm fat, I'm just gonna do it for one more week, one more month, and then, when I see how much good it is doing her, I can't stop. It's a very powerful thing you know."
Salma Hayek on breastfeeding
Getty Images
"I don't feel stunning yet. But I'm breast feeding. And he's sucking it all out of me, it seems. And when the baby comes out, it's a lot of weight right there."
Naomi Watts
Arnaldo Magnani, Getty Images
Jada Pinkett Smith
Getty Images
Cindy Crawfod
Getty Images
Julianne Moore
Getty Images
Demi Moore
Getty Images
Celine Dion
Getty Images
Hillary Clinton
Getty Images
Madonna
Getty Images
Catherine Zeta Jones
Getty Images
Knowing the cost, health and bonding benefits, most new moms plan to nurse for a few months, even a year. What about when that year turns to four or five, or more? It happens more than you'd think.
Mary Pennington of Durham, ME, remembered thinking that her older sister, who nursed one of her children until the age of three, was a little odd. "I didn't get it," she told ParentDish. "If you'd told me that I'd be nursing a four-and-a-half year old, I'd say 'You're crazy.' But I don't think you're prepared for the changes in what you might feel once you have a baby."
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding through the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child. "There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer."
But just 36 percent of babies in the U.S. are breastfed through six months, according to a 2008 report from Brigham Young University. For those who do practice extended nursing, the average is closer to three years. But even the most committed strain under the judging glares of family and strangers.
"Their reaction is uggh," said Robyn Paul, a lactation consultant and mom of three who was interviewed for a 20/20 story, "Breast-feeding Past Infancy." "But it's perfectly normal." When Tiernan, 6, needs comforting, he asks for "nummies." "We've had conversations about what it tastes like and he says it's very sweet," Paul said. "Very few new moms go into pregnancy or childbirth thinking they want to breastfeed a 5-year-old," said Carrie Lauch (pictured), host of Natural Moms Talk Radio and mother of four. She just weaned her 6-year-old daughter six months ago. "But the weeks and months move on, and the benefits for the child and the mother never go away."
Many people, not surprising, believe that's both harmful and shameful. "If a mother is breastfeeding a child of 5 or 6 years old she should be arrested and prosecuted for abuse/sexual molestation/pedophilia/mental illness etc," Mike posted on FaceBook after viewing the program. "Sick. wrong."
"Everyone has their upper limits that they might think was okay, and what's unacceptable," said Pennington, who nursed her daughter Maysa until after her fifth birthday. "And each comes to that on her own. When you're outside of that situation, it might seem inconceivable. But they're still always your baby. And you're just continuing a relationship that has worked since day one. It seems very natural."
The natural length of breastfeeding for humans, according to Katherine A. Dettwyler, Ph.D., an anthropologist and leading expert on breastfeeding, lies between two-and-a-half and seven years. By that math, YouTube phenom Veronika Robinson is an outlier. Nearly 14 million of us have watched her nurse her daughter Eliza, 8.
Heated debate surrounds Pennington, Paul, Robinson and other mothers who continue to nurse outside the norm. Most rarely, if ever, do it in public and consider it a private mother-child experience. "I really feel that there is an extra bonding or attachment there that I would like to think that because he nursed until he was 6, that there was some more closeness there ... that you get when you're able to have him in your arms for a longer period of time," said Paul to 20/20. "My daughter's the same way. Very much so."
Victoria Scanlan Stefanakos is the editor of Project Homestead
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ReaderComments (Page 4 of 42)
2-28-2009 @ 9:34PM
camdon89 said...i just feel there is something inherently wrong with breastfeeding a child who is big enough to get a gallon of milk out of the refridgerator. It just seems weird. i just think the mother does not want to let go of that feeling all of us mothers felt when our children our babies. You feel on top of the world because they need you. She needs to let them go, they will always need her in some form or fashion. But breastfeeding them at 8 years of age, is just not right!
Reply
2-28-2009 @ 9:38PM
OmniV said...I breastfeed all four of my children extended as much as I could. However once they had to start going out in the world I would start backing them off. Mainly because for me it is a private thing & I am not going to go to a playdate & nurse my child. However I have no problem with what other Mom's want to do. Because it is a private choice. I just don't think nursing your toddler/child should be public. Not because I am against it. As I said I believe it is a personal choice. I say this because when a woman goes public with breastfeeding a toddler or child it causes such a nasty back lash. Which I doubt is good for the child. Turning your child's food source into a media zoo is wrong. However I don't feel it is wrong to nurse an infant or small toddler in public so long as your modest about it. I nursed in public often when my babies were new. I simply placed a light blankie over & wore a nursing top. If I was packing my infant you might no even know they were nursing as I walked by unless you were REALLY looking or had done the same. The USA is not ready for a woman's body being used in public for anything other then sexual use. Which is sad & sick & why I think so many have such issues when a woman does use her body for something other then sexual. For all those women who nurse. I hope it brings you & your babies all the joy it brought myself & mine. No matter how long you nurse for so long as you do it tastefully. For those who think extended nursing is sexual you need your head checked. Never in all my years of nursing was it sexual in fact as my infants became toddlers it became more of a sacrifice for me not a source of pleasure. Your sick to think otherwise. Somehow an infant is not the same as your husband's attentions. Not even close. Nor is extended nursing for a toddler. I can't go beyond those years but I am sure the feeling is the same for most Mother's & let me tell you it is not sexual. If you can say that, then you need help.
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3-02-2009 @ 9:02AM
nikole said...you are so right. its funny that people have no problem with sex ebing so out there and women being exploited but nursing is sooo taboo. i do however think that the way you did it is more apropriate then some of the people out there. no blankie, just pullin out the boob for all the world to see. someone did that in the store i was working in and the child wasnt even a small baby who was crying and needed to be fed right then and there. he was old enough to be sitting up on her lap holding the boob eating. n im like wow please stop, but you cant actually say anything. i have no problem with someone using a blankie or one of those poncho things and feeding, but its kinda awkward to have to be there watching it with no blankie.
as far as this extanded breastfeeding? its crazy. no 8 yr old should be breastfeeding. if you think they need your nutrients pump it and let them drink it from a cup. they will be made fun of forever if any one of their friends ever finds out. someone said formula is the only way to get them the best nutrients. thats the dumbest hting ve ever heard. breast milk is the best food for the baby. and i cant believe i saw a woman comment that breast feeding is gross. what?
my niece wasnt breast fed past a few weeks and she is the smartest 2 yr old ive ever met and any one who ever meets her is amazed at her level of inteligence (sp?) and how well all her words are pronounced. im not saying its because she wasnt breast fed im just saying people who say kids are smarter, its not neccessarily true!
2-28-2009 @ 9:43PM
sorry said...breastfeeding a 5,6,7,8+ year old is just sick. There is just no defending that. You want closeness, cuddle on the couch.
Even four is pushing it.
When your child is capable of pouring themselves a glass of milk or juice, they should no longer be breastfeeding, period.
Past three and its not about the child's needs, but the mothers' inability to let go.
Reply
2-28-2009 @ 9:48PM
CaiCai said...I couldn't breastfeed and my daughter is extremely intelligent and healthy. I don't think it has anything to do with how she was fed. Her father is a genius and I believe that is where she gets it from. Bottlefeeding is the only way you can ensure your child is getting all the proper nutrients...breastfeeding - your baby is only getting the nutrients you put in your body. If you refuse to eat carrots, or sneak in chocolate you are hurting the baby.
As far as the article goes, after a year of breastfeeding...it should stop. Sure continue to give your child breastmilk, but PUMP it. There is no reason a 7yr old should be sucking on boobs. I would imagine it being incredibly embarrassing for the child.
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2-28-2009 @ 9:50PM
GLENN said...ANYTHING AFTER 1 1/2 TO 2 YEARS IS SICK............
Reply
3-02-2009 @ 3:06AM
squirl said...I hear ya Glenn !!!!!! EWWWWWWWW !!
2-28-2009 @ 9:51PM
Buslady said...It's nobody's business but mother & child as long as it's not forced on the child.
Fooey on naysayers!
Reply
2-28-2009 @ 10:05PM
obabystar said...These women are sickos...Kids who are 6 years old know "good and bad touch" they know it's wrong and it will screw them up!!!!
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2-28-2009 @ 10:19PM
Suzanna said...I just asked my 9 year old son when he thought women should stop breastfeeding. There was no talk about the article beforehand. His response was between ages 3 and 5. Normal kids not prejudiced by outside influences will go with what they feel is best, not with social mores of their culture. Unfortunately due to a birth defect, he was unable to nurse (I pumped for him until I couldn't anymore), so he doesn't even have his own breastfeeding to go by.
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3-01-2009 @ 11:41AM
Barbie said...I breastfed 6 kids, the average was 2 1/2 years but my last one I breastfed until her 4th birthday. I got great encouragement from friends, family and mainly doctors. My son has Dandy Walker Syndrome and he benefitted the most. My sons neurosurgeon swears his brain growth was because of the extended breastfeeding. My children didn't need a bottle, they needed the closeness that we shared from nursing from my breast, it isn't about just the nutrition. But clearly I knew what was in my milk and didn't have to worry about some formula recall. Not dishing any mother who didn't breastfeed, we all have choices but my choice for my kids was best. Breast is best even the formula companies agree.
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2-28-2009 @ 10:29PM
Hillary said...why dont you take a look at whats in that formula before you feed it to your kid so whats going to harm your kid more a bar of chocolate or taurine do you know what that is bull sperm so in glad your kid drinks bull sperm ill stick with my chocolate it also has oils and corn syrup which contains mercury and howare you so sure that it is even safe atleast my breastmilk wont get recalled and not being handled by some stranger and it has been proven breastfeed kids get along better with the parents commit less crimes have better social standing and everything and as a breastfeeding mom we have more money to go places and we go out to eat to the mall chuck e cheese in the winter and in the summer to zoos amusement parks fairs everything we are never trapped in this and without paying for formula we have tons of extra money instead of being trapped inside every day and for you people afraid of breasts i nurse everywhere we go
Reply
2-28-2009 @ 10:50PM
Robbiesmama said...I commend you on your post. I would NEVER feed my child formula; it is pretty scary what the ingredients are. I am expecting my 4th child, and still brestfeeding my 3rd (20 months old). So far all of my children wean between 2 and 2 1/2 years of age. It is a statistical fact that breastfed children (on average) are healthier, better adjusted, and more intelligent than their formula-fed peers. Of course their are other influences when it comes to intelligence; a child with Down's Syndrome will not become a genius from breastfeeding, but it will enhance an individual's potential intelligence.
2-28-2009 @ 10:12PM
REESE P. said...I am a father of 3, whom all breastfed! And ninth child of 10 whom also were all breastfed! I myself think it is a wonderful thing for mother and child to have that connection! If it be a year or 20 years that is up to mother and child! And as for the others that think it is gross,obscene, and whatever else! GET A FRIGGIN LIFE ALREADY!!!! You are probably suffering from some type of jealousy disorder anyway! (And on a religious note: If God had (NOT) intended the child to breastfeed for years, i'm sure he would have designed the breast to dry up sooner! ) And those of you that think we came from monkeys! pay attention to your primate friends, they will breast feed as long as they are allowed or until another comes along!
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3-01-2009 @ 11:55PM
E raymond said...Reese,
I have a life and I have heard TOO MUCH INFORMATION from everyone on breastfeeding. If it's not such a big deal then whay make it such a big deal?
There's no jealousy here - don't have children, don't want them and certainly don't want to breastfeed anyone!!!! Why do you think that those of us who want you to keep this to yourselves are jealous. We just don't want to hear about it. It should be private. Not all of us are comforatble with this and we don't have to be.
2-28-2009 @ 10:31PM
tiff said...When a kid grows molars, it is a clear sign to quit.
Reply
2-28-2009 @ 11:18PM
Brenda said...When a child is old enough to drink from a cup its time! When a child knows what breast are its time! An 8 year old is already in school ! What does he do ask the teacher to breast feed him! I can see 2 years old but over that is just crazy! I went to a doctors office one time and this woman was breast feeding her son and all the other little kids were so freaked out about it they all stood in front of her stareing.This kid was standing beside her chair breast feeding.
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2-28-2009 @ 11:24PM
houseoconfusion1@aol.com said...My point exactly, I'm sick and tired of my kids AND OTHERS being nothing short of traumatized. Why they can't move to another spot for a private moment. Why does everyone else have to be uncomfortable for their laziness! Seriously, and you wonder why your ridiculed?
2-28-2009 @ 10:19PM
Maggie said...If your kid can ask for it, they're TOO OLD to breast feed. And you have to wonder if it's not some sort of sexual desire on behalf of the Mother whether they will admit it or not. Can you imagine what the father/(hopefully) husband would think? Do you think he'd want to play and fondle "those" after his 8yr old son just jumped in Mummy's lap asked for it and fed? I don't think so. These women have some serious mental health issues most likely including postpartum depression.
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2-28-2009 @ 10:29PM
Barbara said......and the LeLeche gestapo strikes again...They have got to be encouraging them somewhere in the background. I DETEST those people!
You have got to be kidding me...I have seven children...I breast fed ONE of them...as for making them more intelligent??? What the heck are u talking about??...intelligence comes from several factors.. some from the amount of time u spend teaching your child, socio-economic, single parent homes..etc..and here's a thought..some kids are just plain intelligent ...hmmm..One of my sons was multiplying at age four and breastfeeding had nothing to do with it. ( Other sons..aren't slouches in the intellect department either.) Get your facts straight...Women who want to breastfeed for years...that is on them...I say...ew!
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