Jaimie Etkin: The Devil Wore Manolos
Switched at Birth - Man Says He's Lucky to Have Two Mothers
Filed under: In The News, Weird But True
As a child, Fred George never fit in. His Lebanese family was a dark-haired, outgoing bunch, while he was a shy blond. Across town, another boy, Jim Churchman -- the only brunette in his fair Scottish family -- felt the same way.
"People teased me when I was younger," says George. "They said: 'You're a Churchman' ... but I didn't want to know."
What was suspicion became truth. At the age of 57, long after George had moved to the U.S., the two men finally had a DNA test and discovered they'd been switched at birth. Born just two hours apart on Christmas Eve in 1946 in Dunedin, New Zealand, they'd been placed in the wrong bassinets at the hospital.
This week George flew back to New Zealand to surprise the mother who never had a chance to raise him, Helen Churchman, on her 82nd birthday. "I feel I've two families," George said. "And I've been so lucky to have had two mothers." There's also a big blow-out planned for the reunion of the two changelings.
What's remarkable about this story is that on some level, the boys and their families knew there was a mix-up. It was palpable. Even their neighbors suggested it. But think about it: What would you do if you suspected your child -- maybe now half-grown -- really belonged to someone else? It's an impossible dilemma.
George says he's spent much of his life in an "identity crisis." In his book, "Switched at Birth: My Life in Someone Else's World," he describes growing up with a father who said he did not believe George was his. The mother who raised him told the nurse in the hospital she had given her the wrong baby. "Don't be silly," chuckled the nurse, George wrote.
"People teased me when I was younger," says George. "They said: 'You're a Churchman' ... but I didn't want to know."
What was suspicion became truth. At the age of 57, long after George had moved to the U.S., the two men finally had a DNA test and discovered they'd been switched at birth. Born just two hours apart on Christmas Eve in 1946 in Dunedin, New Zealand, they'd been placed in the wrong bassinets at the hospital.
This week George flew back to New Zealand to surprise the mother who never had a chance to raise him, Helen Churchman, on her 82nd birthday. "I feel I've two families," George said. "And I've been so lucky to have had two mothers." There's also a big blow-out planned for the reunion of the two changelings.
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What's remarkable about this story is that on some level, the boys and their families knew there was a mix-up. It was palpable. Even their neighbors suggested it. But think about it: What would you do if you suspected your child -- maybe now half-grown -- really belonged to someone else? It's an impossible dilemma.
George says he's spent much of his life in an "identity crisis." In his book, "Switched at Birth: My Life in Someone Else's World," he describes growing up with a father who said he did not believe George was his. The mother who raised him told the nurse in the hospital she had given her the wrong baby. "Don't be silly," chuckled the nurse, George wrote.
Last year, two Cszechoslovakian women both decided to keep their one-year-old daughters, though they'd been switched at birth. "I cannot even begin to imagine a life without Nikola," said one of the mothers of her switched baby. "How can I now see her as someone else's child and not my own?"
Helen Churchman, the only parent still living, says she feels the same way. "It was an unusual thing to happen," she recently told the Patriot Ledger. "But ... it's fine. I've got two sons now ... it's lovely for Fred to be part of our family."
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 4)
3-07-2009 @ 8:04AM
texasjo said...When my little brother was born, he cried constantly so Dad took him back to the hospital where they kept him for observation. At 3 AM, the hospital called saying the baby died. My Mom was hysterical. An hour later, the hospital called and said that they had made a mistake, because a nurse accidently switched babies. My parents immediately went to get the baby, but my father always sweared that the brown eyed black haired baby was not his. I have blond hair and green eyes. Who knows? Both my parents are dead now and my brother is a little retarded and on dialysis.
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 12:11PM
MANDY said...GET DNA FROM YOUR BROTHER...YOU ALL WILL HAVE TO MATCH IN SOME WAY !
3-07-2009 @ 2:08PM
Brent said...Hey nitenurse. Read the article one more time. His birthmother's name was Churchman. He did not change his name. He grew up with the last name of George.
3-07-2009 @ 3:38PM
JD said...Reatrded is not the proper word to use. Mentally disabled sounds much better. I have a friend of Irish heritage. She has 4 siblings and they all differ with hair and eye color and are all their birth children.
3-07-2009 @ 4:05PM
Bielin said...Why don't you and your brother just have a MT DNA test done. It tests the maternal side of your family so if you had the same mother it will match.
3-08-2009 @ 10:42PM
Pat De Range said...To bad your parents didn't press their thoughts any further, your brother may have died and they managed to bring him back to life (not telling you that he got brain damage from that ordeal). Just because their a doctor or hospital that don't mean that they are God..you MUST question every thing. I have learned from my own experiances to do that, when my son's were born the hospital and doctor messed up prom the get go, Murphie's law sure took place with my son's, one died and the other one is MRRD. Then to top it all off the doctors told us that he would be a vegtable, blind and can't hear..they were all wrong, he's slow and can't walk but he sees, hears and enjoys his cartoons and favorite foods, and he's a happy young man. If we had put him away as they suggested he would have been lost.
3-07-2009 @ 8:43AM
Angiebaby said...This is an example of a mistake with a happy ending. Seldom does real life turn out that way.
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 8:44AM
Kristin said...This probably happened all the time years ago. My grandmother was sent home from the hospital (the old New England Memorial Hopsital in Stoneham, MA) approximately 62 years ago. She noticed "her baby" no longer had the birth mark with which he was born. Everyone, though, kept saying she was crazy and that the baby looked just like "Uncle Babe." Finally, the hospital called and she asked them if she had the wrong baby. They said yes and asked her if she wanted to keep the wrong baby (this was after only 1 day). She said she wanted her baby back. So, a nurse came in a cab with my uncle (at least we think it was my uncle!) and switched the babies. The other mother never knew her baby left the hospital that December.
Reply
3-10-2009 @ 6:51PM
blokhed24 said...whoa. thats a wild story.....was that recent? i just cant believe hospitals would make mistakes like that.....so weird.
3-07-2009 @ 10:23AM
carol said...http://www.amazon.com/Switched-At-Birth-Someone-Elses/product-reviews/1439204829/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 10:48AM
McMomma66 said...I was given the wrong baby shortly after mine was born. The nurse brought me a baby who was similar to mine but after looking him over and checking his wrist band I saw his name was different than the name I gave my baby. I rang for the nurse who apologised profusely for the mistake. You just can't be too careful because someone is always nearby who's going to screw up. These kind of mistakes are uncalled for!
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 11:28AM
Anne said...I can understand the two mothers that wanted to keep the children they had raised instead of switching back. The soul connection is made after the birth of a child, not from the DNA.. We adopted our son when he was born. He is more important than my life.
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 11:06PM
sarjoc said...I could not agree with you more...you sound like a great Mom!
3-08-2009 @ 12:24AM
Ann said...As an adoptee, I agree with you that yes, there is a soul connection made with the adoptive parent after birth and you truly are the mother and your adopted child truly is your child, BUT, there is also something to be said for DNA. Some of us adoptees have a deep longing to discover our identity, in terms of our DNA, ethnicity, ancestry, what our birthparents were like, etc. This feeling often surfaces in adolescence or early adulthood. It is a mystery, a missing piece for some of us. Where did I come from, what is the lineage I belong to? When I did find my birthparents, the similariities not only in looks, but also in personality,interests, abilities, and even the paths that our lives had taken were uncanny between me and my birthfather, who never knew I existed. Please be open to your child possibly having this need to find out later on. My adoptive mother was so supportive of me she was able to welcome my birthfather into our extended family, and laughed at the resemblance the minute she met him. (My birthmother chose not to have any further contact beyond our initial meeting -- but at least I got to hear her story, find out what countries my ancestors came from, and some medical history). I am complete in my identity now, and as before, my adoptive parents are definitely my only true mom and dad.
3-08-2009 @ 1:22AM
Anne said...To Ann,the adoptee (I should have mentioned earlier) I understand the importance of knowing your roots. That is why, when we adopted our son, I made sure that it was an open adoption. We see the birthmomfrom at least once a year. It has been interesting to see many things that you might not think are genetic really are, even taste in specific foods.
3-08-2009 @ 6:25AM
Elaine said...I am the adoptive mom of two girls: half-sisters by birth and full sisters by adoption. A few years ago my younger daughter received an e-mail from a birth relative looking for her birth cousin. Since then we've met birthmom and much extended family and stay incontact. Knowing her roots first hand has brought closure to all the haughting questions and allowed that heavy backpack to be lifted. I am Mom. . .Birthmom is called by her first name as "our" child is now an adult and has an adult relationship with her birthmom; "adults call each other by their first names", says my daughter and those were the terms for meeting birthmom. What amazes my daughter is how often birth family still continues to say,"We are so glad we found you." Her reply is,"I wasn't lost . . .I have a life of my own and have had a life all the time we were seperated! We can have a future, but please stop saying I was lost. I was not stolen. I was legally adopted as a result of court action." My feelings are the birthmother suffered long enough for her mistakes and paid dearly. How wonderful it was to lift her burden 18 years later and place a phone call letting her know her girls were loved everyday she had been seperated from them. She slept peacefully once again . . .
3-07-2009 @ 12:12PM
Aninonymous said...They brought my newborn daughter to a different mother, actually my room-mate to be nursed in the middle of the night. I remember hearing the baby crying and that the other mother put her down on the bed. I remember thinking that was dangerous: what if the baby rolled off the bed.
A little later they came back in with my neighbor's real child who was hungry again. So, they realized their mistake; and were honest enough to admit it and tell us.
I did not do anything like sue the hospital because I hate that.
I figure that my little girl just got some extra antibodies into her system and she was just fine.
Reply
3-08-2009 @ 1:47PM
tanya said...I had my daughter two years ago the day after I had her the nurse came in and asked me if i wanted to feed the baby so she went to go get her after what felt like forever i heard a baby crying and getting closer and closer to the room only this cry was not my baby my body tensed and when the nurse walked in the door with this baby with a full head of hair and horrible cry i started to flip out my baby has blonde hair and even though i just had her i knew her cry she went back and got MY baby but it just amazes me in this day an age how this type of thing can still happen
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 12:22PM
Mary said...A nurse tried to give my son to another new mom in the hospital. The give away was that my son was 11 1/2 # at birth. The other new mom screamed, I could tell that big bundle was mine so I jumped out of bed to get him. But, I have wondered if the features had been closer would I have ended up with my son.
Reply
3-07-2009 @ 1:12PM
Becky said...29 years ago, I was going to have a caeserean section at a San Fernando Valley CA hospital. I did not know what gender my baby would be. I chose the name Alexandra if the baby turned out to be a girl.
I shared my room with another woman who was in labor, divided by a curtain.
My baby turned out to be a boy. But the woman's baby turned out to be a girl and she named her Alexandra. The woman's husband's name is Bernard, the same name as my 13-yr. son, and the woman's name is Margaret, the same name as my 14-yr. old daughter.
I was thinking that if my baby came out to be a girl, she would
have a name tag of 'Alexandra', same name as this other woman's baby.
It would be very possible to have the two female babies switched. However, it would be corrected right away as our family has Pacific Islander ethnicity (brown skin) and the other family are caucasians.
Reply