Hot on HuffPost Parents:
Linda Bloom LCSW and Charlie Bloom MSW: Overwhelmed Parents: A…
Allison Tate: What I Would Like to Tell My Son's 5th Grade Teacher Now
Teen "Sexting" Isn't All That Dangerous
Filed under: Opinions
Texting naked photos of yourself is stupid, but it's not the most problematic thing kids are doing online. For most teens, cyberbullying is a far bigger problem.
When I was a teenager, our parents worried that we were having sex, but they didn't think about whether or not we were taking nude photos of ourselves and passing them around at school. These days, though, kids are having cybersex at an alarming rate -- or so the media would have you believe. One recent study found that 20 percent of teens admit to texting racy photos of themselves to friends and classmates. School administrators argue that the numbers are far higher than that.
"Sexting" is a terrible idea, clearly, but is it really dangerous, or just stupid? Concerned parents and teachers say it is incredibly dangerous, putting kids at risk for all kinds of sexual attacks. That photo your daughter takes for her boyfriend could easily find its way onto the Internet, where crafty pedophiles have access to it -- and to your daughter.
At least, that's the claim.
The reality, though, is that sexting does not make our kids any more likely to be targets of pedophiles. In fact, Harvard researchers claim that "the risks minors face online are in most cases not significantly different from those they face offline." In other words, most teens who wind up having sex with someone via the Internet were looking for someone to have sex with. The Web doesn't increase their risk; it's just a new place to search for partners.
The biggest danger kids face from the Internet and related technologies like video and cell phones is old-fashioned bullying. Over a third of teens report being cyberbullied. This kind of bullying includes threatening messages, having private emails or embarrassing pictures posted without consent or just general rumor-mongering. In this context, sending out sexy photos is still an incredibly bad idea -- not because it makes your child a target for pedophiles, but because it provides the cyberbullies with fodder.
And who are those cyberbullies? They're the same kids (schoolmates, neighbors, etc.) who were bullying long before there was an Internet.
So can we stop worrying about this whole "sexting" thing? Sort of. It turns out that unlike my high school peers, who just had sex, today's teens appear to be substituting sexting for actual biblical knowledge of other teens. Today's kids are actually having less sex than their parents were at their age, according to Kathleen A. Bogle, a sociologist at La Salle University. The number of teen virgins is up. Yes, teen birth rates have risen, but Bogle connects that to a reduction in contraceptive use, possibly affiliated with abstinence-only sex education.
So much for the Internet as a hotbed of teenage promiscuity.
Still, sexting is alarming to parents because it seems so extreme -- why on earth would your child send naked photos of him or herself to anyone? We don't want our kids looking at porn, and we certainly don't want them creating it, especially not with the cell phone we bought them.
What can you do to protect your kids? The most important thing is to talk with them. Explain to your kids that while you respect their privacy, you have a right, as their parent, to review their on-line communications and text messages if you think there is reason to worry about them. Also, talk about bullying, and make clear that they shouldn't be embarrassed about being bullied or put up with it for any reason.
And finally, if you're still fretting about sexting, make sure your kids understand that the Internet is forever, and that photo they think will be so fun to send to one person could wind up being viewed by thousands. A little embarrassment goes a long way.
Are you more concerned about sexting or cyberbullying?
When I was a teenager, our parents worried that we were having sex, but they didn't think about whether or not we were taking nude photos of ourselves and passing them around at school. These days, though, kids are having cybersex at an alarming rate -- or so the media would have you believe. One recent study found that 20 percent of teens admit to texting racy photos of themselves to friends and classmates. School administrators argue that the numbers are far higher than that.
"Sexting" is a terrible idea, clearly, but is it really dangerous, or just stupid? Concerned parents and teachers say it is incredibly dangerous, putting kids at risk for all kinds of sexual attacks. That photo your daughter takes for her boyfriend could easily find its way onto the Internet, where crafty pedophiles have access to it -- and to your daughter.
At least, that's the claim.
Scary Cyber Attacks
Teen Commits Suicide Over MySpace Hoax
A cruel prank leads to terrible tragedy, and murder charges for the perpetrators.
Read More
djayo on SXC
Facebook Group Sends Teacher to Therapy
And the kids who created it were suspended.
Read More
Bubbles on SXC
Fake MySpace Page Destroys Teen's Reputation
A malicious, random attack led this 4.0 student all the way to Dr. Phil in an attempt to clear his name.
Read More
YouTube
Attack Recorded on Cellphone, Posted to Facebook
These middle school students shared their violent video with some online buddies, and wound up suspended.
Read More
smitea on SXC
Online Attacks Spur Real-Life Violence
Two girls attempts to retaliate against a cyberbully led to a street fight.
Read More
SXC
Investigators Posing as Teens Propositioned for Sex
Staff members of the New York Attorney General signed up for Facebook pretending to be teens and were repeatedly asked if they had any "nude pics" to share -- and it gets worse.
Read More
forwardcom on SXC
The Real Threat Might Surprise You
According to a new report, your kids are in greater danger from cyberbullying than they are from online sexual predators.
Read More
ArminH on SXC
Predators Aren't Who You Think
Worried about adults with foul intentions posing as teens online? Chances are they're not the ones hitting your kids up for sex -- but the real culprits are even worse.
Read More
bruno-free on SXC
The reality, though, is that sexting does not make our kids any more likely to be targets of pedophiles. In fact, Harvard researchers claim that "the risks minors face online are in most cases not significantly different from those they face offline." In other words, most teens who wind up having sex with someone via the Internet were looking for someone to have sex with. The Web doesn't increase their risk; it's just a new place to search for partners.
The biggest danger kids face from the Internet and related technologies like video and cell phones is old-fashioned bullying. Over a third of teens report being cyberbullied. This kind of bullying includes threatening messages, having private emails or embarrassing pictures posted without consent or just general rumor-mongering. In this context, sending out sexy photos is still an incredibly bad idea -- not because it makes your child a target for pedophiles, but because it provides the cyberbullies with fodder.
And who are those cyberbullies? They're the same kids (schoolmates, neighbors, etc.) who were bullying long before there was an Internet.
So can we stop worrying about this whole "sexting" thing? Sort of. It turns out that unlike my high school peers, who just had sex, today's teens appear to be substituting sexting for actual biblical knowledge of other teens. Today's kids are actually having less sex than their parents were at their age, according to Kathleen A. Bogle, a sociologist at La Salle University. The number of teen virgins is up. Yes, teen birth rates have risen, but Bogle connects that to a reduction in contraceptive use, possibly affiliated with abstinence-only sex education.
So much for the Internet as a hotbed of teenage promiscuity.
Still, sexting is alarming to parents because it seems so extreme -- why on earth would your child send naked photos of him or herself to anyone? We don't want our kids looking at porn, and we certainly don't want them creating it, especially not with the cell phone we bought them.
What can you do to protect your kids? The most important thing is to talk with them. Explain to your kids that while you respect their privacy, you have a right, as their parent, to review their on-line communications and text messages if you think there is reason to worry about them. Also, talk about bullying, and make clear that they shouldn't be embarrassed about being bullied or put up with it for any reason.
And finally, if you're still fretting about sexting, make sure your kids understand that the Internet is forever, and that photo they think will be so fun to send to one person could wind up being viewed by thousands. A little embarrassment goes a long way.
Are you more concerned about sexting or cyberbullying?
Your<span>Voice</span>
Ask Us Anything About Parenting
Recently Asked
- Does the dc superior court represent the irs in a civil filing or does the irs have attorneys?
- If i own all or most of the property in dc think the mayor already knows. president and others including Embassies. on my property for 20 +years
- Is it legal to claim relation to a person ? ( OR DOES IT HAVE TO BE FOR MONATERY GAIN) TO BE ILLEGAL ?
TheTalkies:RelatedVideos
-
%media:title.value% %media:description.value%
SitesWeLove
- Site Map
- |
- Staff
- |
- Terms of Service
- |
- Privacy Policy
- |
- Trademarks
- |
- Advertise With Us
- |
- About Our Ads
- |
- AOL Downloads
- |
- Contact Us
- |
© Copyright 2012 AOL Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Aol Family
ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
3-11-2009 @ 9:50PM
barra said...be careful about sexting that can be preventing forever from criminalized record in which it standard each of individence can be change from what parenting guide can leading direction where it standing keep it off record sexting it is not easier for you of individence involved in criminalized record very careful about that seriously.
Reply
3-13-2009 @ 2:22AM
lydi said...barra- please learn english before making any more comments. I cant figure out WTF you meant.
3-09-2009 @ 11:22AM
KenS said...WOW. You really think that a teenager taking a naked picture of themselves and sending it to a "significant" other (I put that in quotes because we all know how significant high school relationships are in the long-run of your life) isn't dangerous? You think it's just stupid? What about when that photo gets plastered online? What about when pedophiles start trading it as kiddie porn? What about when authorities find out and then charge your child with producing child pornography? What about later in life when they are looking for a job and their potential employer Google’s them and sees it?
Reply
3-10-2009 @ 9:06PM
Steve said...you must be stupid lady. check out this link....
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2009/03/09/pn.sexting.suicide.cnn
somehow it seems a little more dangerous now doesn't it?
Reply
4-30-2009 @ 5:22PM
Richard said...The Institute for Responsible Online and Cell-Phone Communication has an effective method for dealing with the vast number of digital issues we are aware of (like the trend du jour known as "sexting"), and those that we will be aware of soon.
Despite this fact however, our nation and media seem to be content with treating these digital, 21st century issues, with an "old school" 20th century approach. Unfortunately, based on past headlines regarding "spyware" and "cyber bullying" and now with the national fixture of sexting in the news, it appears we are failing an entire digital generation.
Fortunately however, there is an effective way to save this new generation for those of us willing to listen. It is through The Institute for Responsible Online and Cell-Phone Communication's concept of "Responsibility 2.1C".
Think about it...
1: Can you honestly say that you have never been irresponsible either as a kid touching a hot stove, or smoking (underage), or drinking underage, or trying drugs?
2: Did you always listen to your parents, teachers or caretakers when they told you not to do these things and offered you a ton of information about why you shouldn't?
3: Have you ever been irresponsible or break the law as an adult (e.g. speeding, running a red light)?
4: Have you ever posted your status on Facebook as "On Vacation", "Traveling" or "Out"?
Well if you answered “NO” to any of the questions above (even # 4), your life may have been over at a very young age (or it could be altered soon) as is the case for many people of today’s digital generation, because it only takes a few seconds of irresponsibility online to ruin your life.
For Example: Lighting up a cigarette, or trying a beer at the age of 17 most of the time, will not instantly alter your life, or affect your loved one's lives, or the life or someone halfway around the globe. However, as we have read lately, in the time it takes a 17 year old to press the send button on a cell phone with a naked picture attached (less time to finish a drag of a cigarette or sip of beer) he/she could be placed in jail and registered as a sex offender.
Simply saying, “don’t do that” to a kid or flooding them with "tip sheets" and facts did not work when you were one, so why would it work now? The real difference and alarming issue is that the digital technologies available to our youth deliver instant consequences that can alter their life. Fortunately, it appears that the Institute's concept of Responsibility 2.1C may just be the way to reach this new generation.
Richard Guerry, the visionary behind the concept of "Responsibility 2.1C" and co-founder of The Institute for Responsible Online and Cell-Phone Communication recently stated that "We as a nation need to provide direct proactive communication of Digital Responsibility (Responsibility 2.1C) to a new generation. We cannot be reactionary treating today's digital issues, and we cannot resolve them with 20th century threats, reprimand and curriculum." He went on to say, "The real problem is our youth has grown up learning what we call responsibility 1.0 or offline responsibility. They do not understand the scope of the repercussions when they invoke poor (digital) judgment because they have not been proactively taught digital responsibility or what we call, responsibility 2.1C. We cannot apply 20th century solutions to 21st century issues."
Find out more about how you can support The Institute for Responsible Online and Cell-Phone Communication and help them save your community by visiting www.iroc2.org or www.sextingisstupid.com
Reply
2-12-2010 @ 12:27PM
Eve said...The majority of good ebooks one can http://www.pdfqueen.com find and download in pdf format only. But it's not really a problem, 'cause you can easily convert pdf format into any other.
Reply