Living With Less Can Lead Families to More
Categories: Money & Work, Resources
In 1956, Coach Jerry Sacharski couldn't turn away the little guys who showed up wanting to be part of his summer baseball program, so he started the first PeeWee T-ball league to teach the six -to-eight-year-old set the fundamentals of baseball and a thing or two about good, clean fun. Mr. Sacharski passed away on February 27th, and this week the the Wall Street Journal pondered whether parents, concerned with our shaky economic climate, might be foregoing expensive family vacations this summer to rediscover less costly family-bonding activities like T-ball and a game of catch in the backyard.
That story reminded me of an Oprah episode I recently saw about Candice, a widowed mom who agreed to undergo a week-long experiment with living with less – no shopping, no eating out, and no TV. During the week, Candice confesses to feeling guilt and shame for having financed her family's lifestyle on credit. She also comes to realize that she shops to medicate the pain of her husband's death.
By the end of the week, the entire family had undergone a profound transformation. Prior to the experiment, Candice's teenage sons couldn't remember the last time they ate a sit-down, home-cooked family dinner; now they eagerly look forward to it. And despite their initial protestations, they admit that living without TV or video games brought their family closer.
Candice's final exercise was to think back on a time when her family was happiest and most connected. She took the camera crew back to the modest home she once shared with her late husband and recalled a day when the family spent an afternoon playing together in piles of leaves. "[Now] I know my children don't need the stuff. All I ever needed was them, and all they ever needed was me."
Just yesterday, my husband was talking to a man who owns a few rustic rental cabins on a lake in northern Wisconsin. He told Sean that this season, rentals are down for his usual customers, men-only group fishing trips, but he's seeing an unusual uptick in cabins being booked by young urban and suburban families with kids: "Back to basics, I guess, in this economy," he mused.
There is plenty to bemoan as our country struggles to figure a way out of this financial mess. But maybe it also means more T-ball, leaf-piles, and fishing weekends for time-strapped families and technology-saturated kids. As the famous Spanish saying goes: "No hay mal que por bien no venga." ("There is no bad thing from which something good doesn't emerge").
How is the economy affecting your time with your family?
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Sifrina 3-11-2009 @ 8:13PM
I agree with everything you've said. For many families, life has become way too materialistic and yet too unstable (with the average family holding 4 digits in credit card debt - unreal!). Even if forced to, there is so much good in embracing simplicity and tightening one’s belt.
Growing up, I did not get everything I wanted (but everything I needed and a college education) and although I desperately craved and coveted everything as a teenager, I now understand how that experience has shaped me. For fun as a small child, I remember creating Grecian sandals with cardboard and shoelaces (and, yes, I proudly wore them). Looking back, I do not view my childhood as materialistically deprived, but fulfilling and rich.
Nowadays I do appreciate buying nice things but I truly don’t care about keeping up with the Joneses and never have. I'd be lying if I said I didn't spoil my son on too many occasions - it would be better if he heard “no” more often when it comes to toys (eBay has become my yard sale of choice!). However, he also truly enjoys lazy weekend mornings doing simple things like reading and creating shadow boxes, toys and “play sets” (with his imagination, scissors and construction paper) like I did 35 years ago. No one can buy that for him.
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Chere 3-12-2009 @ 8:56AM
Great post Rachel. I saw that episode of Oprah too, and I remember feeling quite sad for those ladies. But how great was it that they came out of that experiment realizing that stuff is just that... stuff. Fortunately, I still have my job, my home and my bills aren't suffering. I have treid to be more mindful of what I spend and I try to keep the balances on the credit card at $0. There are so many things that families can do that don't require money. Last weekend we had a small heat wave in MD about 72 so I put my daughter's picnic table in the backyard and we had a picnic, with PB&J, fresh squeezed lemonade, fruit and crackers. We brought out some books, and just had fun. That didn't cost a thing and my 3 year old is still talking about it.
I hope that through this economic crisis people pull together and realize that the material things dont matter so much, it is the bonds we have with one another. We all need home, clothing, food, and shelter, but the time that we spend together is priceless.
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Krissi 3-12-2009 @ 10:52AM
We haven't had cable for three years. We moved into a (small) house on a temporary basis, 6 mo. lease. My husband was sort of in-between jobs and starting his own non-profit. We have ended up in this house for three years and have watched little-to-no tv in this time. We've never been big into video games or computer time either. It greatly increases the amount of time my kids have to feel like they are kids-in spite of school, extra-curriculars, and other community involvements. We always eat breakfast and dinner together (kids are close in age, too-only 4 years between the three of them). We like it this way!
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Sherry Artemenko 3-16-2009 @ 12:49PM
Rachel I agree with you. I am seeing many positive side-effects of this difficult economic situation. Families are spending more quality time, playing games and reading books together. This past weekend's NY Times ran an article on when times are tough, libraries thrive. I am a speech language pathologist with a blog, and lots of great activities and book suggestions based on their language value. Visit Play on Words Here
I love to review new books at the local library available for FREE!
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sherry Artemenko 3-16-2009 @ 12:54PM
My website is www.playonwords.com
Angie 4-23-2009 @ 2:48PM
If I didn't have my own business we would definitely be feeling the affects of the economy. My husband's hours have been cut 3 times in the past 3 months. Fortunately, as his hours are being cut my business is booming. In fact, I'm looking for business partners who want to earn a great income from home. Visit my website for more information. http://www.MomsWhoSucceed.com
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