Is Madonna Fit to Adopt?
Categories: Adoption, Celeb Parenting
Madonna's ex-husband, Guy Ritchie, says that she's a "great mum," but the rejection of Madonna's application to adopt four-year old Mercy James by Malawi's High Court seems to imply otherwise. The adoption was denied on grounds of "residency" and a fear that relaxing these laws for Madonna might have serious implications for future adoptions with regards to child trafficking. However, the fact that she was permitted to adopt her son David, also a Malawian orphan, has many wondering whether the current judge, a woman, was less than impressed with Madonna's mommy credentials.
In Malawi's very traditional Christian culture, Madonna's recent divorce and latest hook-up with a 22-year-old Brazilian model named Jesus were probably not helpful. Equally unhelpful are Madonna's celebrity antics and over-the-top lifestyle, which she seems incapable of scaling back on during her visits to this desperately poor African nation. She travels exclusively by private jet with a large entourage that includes Israeli bodyguards, a trainer, and her treadmill (yes, she has that flown in). She also has French wine flown to the luxury lodge she rents out – apparently the South African wines they serve are not to her liking. Since all appointments revolve around her strict two-hour workouts, a three hour car tour of the Malawi countryside to visit Mercy's orphanage was attended by Madonna's staff – not the Material Girl, who stayed behind to exercise.
Even Madonna's charity work in Malawi, which to her credit, is extensive, is wrought with her eccentricity and narcissism. The thousands of children who attend the schools she funds are subjected to "spirituality classes" which are code for "Kabbalah," a religion based on the mystical aspects of Judaism; Madonna is Kabbalah's most famous and enthusiastic follower. For government officials of this traditional Christian culture, this must have been interpreted as the height of arrogance and insensitivity on the part of a celebrity philanthropist who purports to love the people and culture of Malawi.
Others wonder whether the judge was influenced by the fact that Madonna's mothering involves a team of nannies, several of whom have recently quit. As one British journalist said: "Neither her millions nor her muscles adds up to a hill of beans when it comes to assessing her suitability as a mother."
Here's what I think: It is true that none of this adds up to much confidence in Madonna as a loving, stable and deeply involved mother. However, Johnny-come-lately claims of the grandparents of poor little Mercy James are equally hollow. Where were these relatives when Madonna set out to adopt this child who was living in the Home of Hope Orphanage? And what realistic prospects are there for an orphan girl born in a country that ranks among the ten poorest in the world?
Madonna's detractors are smugly pleased that a spoiled, millionaire pop star is being told "no" by a third world judge, but I wonder if, in all this circus, what's best for little Mercy is being truly considered. I wonder if perhaps there are worse things for a toddler than being forced to eat a macrobiotic diet, being raised by a nanny or being subjected to Kabbalah. Growing up in a Malawian orphanage comes to mind.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Michelle 4-07-2009 @ 12:43PM
I think adoption is a wonderful thing, and those who are willing to take on such a selfless responsibility are to be applauded. But I do wonder if Madonna actually wants to adopt children out of the goodness of her heart or for the publicity. Madonna has always thrived on fame, I recall her saying in the 80's she was wanted to "rule the world", and in many ways, she got her wish. She's a complete control freak.
The fact that her first child was purposely born out of wedlock and that she then divorced her second child's father, are not good examples of someone who has family as her top priority. I actually think that living in an orphanage might not be as bad as being tossed from nanny to nanny. I am tired of Madonna trying to find new ways to sell herself. Her 15 minutes of fame was over a long time ago.
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Rachel is biased once again 4-07-2009 @ 2:25PM
Hmmm - you're sounding prejudice to me. Having to point out "ISRAELI" bodyguards (why not just bodyguards?) and the comment ""spirituality classes" which are code for "Kabbalah," a religion based on the mystical aspects of Judaism;". Are you aware of how many Christian missionaries are set up throughout the world? I'm sure you have zero issue with their spirituality classes. Are these people subjected to Christianity as you phrase "subjected to Kabbalah". If she were espousing Christianity I'm sure you'd be behind her adoption 100%
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Kirstie 4-07-2009 @ 4:55PM
You're right in that there was no need to point out the fact that her bodyguards are Israeli - that has no bearing whatsoever on the article.
As to spirituality classes, however, I'm not so sure she's being biased. IF they really are being instructed in the ways of Kabbalah as a requirement for attendance at the school (are they? or are they overall spirituality classes in which the children are taught about multiple faiths? That makes a big difference here), that is somewhat insensitive on Madonna's part.
Malawi is a nation which is 79.9% Christian and 12.8% Muslim. 4.3% of the people have no faith at all, leaving only 3% of the population for every other possible faith - meaning that an extremely small part of the population is Jewish. Being that an even smaller portion of Jews actually subscribe to the Kabbalah tradition, that's a strange requirement to hold the entire student population to.
mommy4 4-08-2009 @ 12:48AM
This blog is exactly right - yes Madonna seems eccentric and narcissistic - but at the end of the day, would that child be better off living in an orphanage in Malawi? NO! I agree with Rachel on this one. As for the comment suggesting the blogger is prejudiced against Jews because she mentioned that Madonna has a team of Israeli security guards is not only a stretch, but downright ridiculous. Is she prejudiced against the French, producers of some of the worlds' best wine because she pointed out Madonna's preference for French wines? Of course not. If anything, Rachel's pointing out that Madonna's entourage includes Israeli security guards only serves to further illustrate that Madonna demands the best wherever she goes since Israeli security firms are widely considered world-class.
All of this, however, is besides the point...the point was simply that despite Madonna's eccentricities, she is certainly in a position to provide this orphan a much better life than she would have otherwise - and these proceedings should be about what is best for that individual child. Period. The "Rachel is biased once again" comment tells me you have simply missed the point.
alexandramae 4-08-2009 @ 12:37PM
Look, she's pointing out that she's eccentric and demanding. She doesn't have just bodyguards, she has a certain TYPE of bodyguard because she's peculiar and only wants the best. Given that her religion comes from Judaism, perhaps that's why she chose them. I know of orphanages that only care for children until the family is able to. Mostly until the child is off milk or is able to care for themselves easier. They work with the families and move forward. I'm personally glad that her fame didn't give her this little girl. She has not met the guidelines for the adoption.
Glorious 4-07-2009 @ 3:05PM
Great article! Thanks Rachel.
RachelIsBiased wrote: Are these people subjected to Christianity as you phrase "subjected to Kabbalah".
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Missionaries do not hold classes. They teach and if people want to hear what they have to say, they are welcome.
We need to advocate Christianity more. This Kaballah cr@p and other self-help, new age bull is gonna hurt a lot of people.
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Kristy 4-08-2009 @ 8:50AM
I actually have to agree with Rachel's basic premise here. The family of this little girl had no interest in her until the media came around. I saw in another article that his girl's grandmother said that adoption was stealing--of course, this grandmother had not taken care of the girl prior to her being placed in an orphanage and is not taking care of her now.
In response to the comment that missionaries do not hold classes, this is simply not true. Many missionaries, particularly Catholic missionaries, will not provide their "charitable" services unless the individual attends religous classes. This is true both in the developing world and in many places in the United States.
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Mary Sullivan 4-08-2009 @ 10:45AM
Neither of the 2 options for this little girl seem ideal: Malawi orphanage or raised by Madonna. Is there a choice C? I'm a little confused about the relatives--they're not actually raising her if she's living in an orphanage, right? Are they involved in her life nonetheless and afraid they'll never see her again if Madonna gets her? (a valid concern, I'm sure)
Mary
http://www.squidoo.com/familydance
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Sifrina 4-08-2009 @ 8:41PM
She takes her treadmill w/her?! That is just so extreme and the excessive workouts strike me as more than a little off balance (but getting the French wine flown in seems ok if not consumed in excess). Personally, I'd want to spend more time absorbing every facet of the original culture of my adoptive child rather than imposing/importing mine on others there, but then I'm not Madonna.
For the average family, becoming adoptive parents (domestic or international) involves a great deal of expense, paperwork, waiting and putting nearly all aspects of your life and history (medical and psychological) under a microscope. It would disturb me to know that celebrities can "short circuit" this careful parent-selection process simply because of their fame and money. The stated reasoning for this decision makes sense and it may have had nothing to do with the lack of Christianity in Madonna's household (many countries slow down the number of adoptions and even "close" adoptions temporarily at certain times when they become too popular). Is it possible that religous people are reading too much of what they want to read into this legal decision?
There's no way for most of us to know for sure, but my sense is that she loves all her children very much and they are nurtured and well taken care of, if living in rather eccentric conditions most of us could not relate to.
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Sara Washburn 4-22-2009 @ 7:58PM
Do you really think Mercy is better off in an orphanage than with a single parent and three siblings? Being an adopted child myself--I think she would benefit being adopted by Madonna. Rachel, we are not all perfect parents, and Madonna should not be punished because she is a wealthy celeb.
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