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6th Grader Sues Dad Over Grounding - And Wins
Filed under: In The News, Weird But True
The 12-year-old girl's parents are divorced; in the spring of 2008, the girl's mom gave her permission to go on a class trip to Quebec City in June. But the middle-schooler lived with her father, and after she disobeyed daddy's orders to stay off the Internet, he told her she couldn't go. So what did she do? She took him to court. Of course.
A lower court ruled in favor of the girl, who went on the embattled class trip. Her father appealed -- on principle - -and amazingly, the girl won again. The father's attorney, Kim Beaudoin, says that her client is "flabbergasted" and they are considering another appeal, this time to Canada's Supreme Court. But, the attorney adds, the father has no regrets about the court proceedings. "Either way, he doesn't have authority over this child anymore. She sued him because she doesn't respect his rules," Beaudoin said. "It's very hard to raise a child who is the boss."
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Virginia
Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
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Nevada
It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.
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Colorado: It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.
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Florida: A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.Image couresty of Flickr, licensed under Creative Commons.
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Wisconsin: Margarine may not be substituted for butter in restaurants unless it is requested by the customer.
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Illinois: You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
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This and more other dumb laws can be found at Flickr, licensed under Creative Commons.
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Georgia: Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs.
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Texas: A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
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Now, I don't know a lot about the law, but I watch enough "Law & Order" to know that one thing that counts in the legal world is precedent. CBC News says that "the appeal court warned [that] the case should not be seen as an open invitation for children to take legal action every time they're grounded." But here's thing: If you don't want someone to consider using your ruling in other cases, maybe you shouldn't make the ruling. And what could the judge's reasoning possibly have been? Lucie Fortin, the Legal Aid lawyer who helped the girl take her pops to court, said that "The trip was very important" to the daughter. How is that a legal argument? Don't parents have the right to punish their children? (This is like making Consensual Living a legal requirement.)
Sadly, the case has destroyed the relationship between the girl and her father. "We went from a child who wanted to live with her father, and after all this has been done, they're not speaking anymore." The father's attorney adds, "We have a lot of work to re-establish a link between those two."
| The court - the dad made the wrong choice. | |
|---|---|
| The father - she deserved to be grounded. | |
| The girl - kids have rights, too! | |
| The whole thing is just ridiculous. |
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ReaderComments (Page 7 of 23)
4-08-2009 @ 11:23PM
KMart2000 said...Surely this is another fabrication. When I was 12, I couldn't afford an attorney!!! It is not surprising kids don't respect their parents since they keep having their authority taken away. Since most jails are overcrowded and legitimate hearings are delayed indefinitely, how did this kid get in court in time to go on her trip. Sorry your relationship with your child has been comprised- you should send her to live with the judge for a while. Bet he will ground her, or she won't pull her shenanigans while in his charge!
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4-08-2009 @ 11:26PM
Rhonda McEntire said...Just more of the STATE raising our kids...instead of letting us be parents!!
PS. I know this Quebec that they are talking about, but the U.S. isn't much better as far as "God given rights" are concerned.
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4-08-2009 @ 11:31PM
Esstee said...I'm not surprised. I work in a public environment and I've been noticing more and more how it's the children whom think that they are the boss of their parents instead of the parents being the boss of their children.
As parents, we should not allow our court system or our children to tell us how to raise them. That's just messed up!!
I fully agree that the law should step in when a child is physicaly abused, sexually abused, verbally abused and/or neglected. But, when it comes to a child not obeying their parents or not respecting their parents wishes and that parent chooses to ground them .... the law should stay out of it!!
The girl is only 12 for goodness sakes. Her dad did nothing wrong for telling her to stay off the internet. How many young girls have fallen prey to sex offenders on the internet?? .... Many!! If I were this girl's parent, that's what I would stand on in court.
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4-09-2009 @ 1:25PM
Stephanie said...What judge in their right mind would agree to hear this case? This isn't a court issue it is a family issue and taking it to court is a waste of tax payer's money! Yes her mom gave her permission but she was living in her father's house with his rules. She broke them end of story. Now this court has totally underminded his entire authority as her father. And the daughter's lawyer should be disbarred for even agreeing to this. "The trip was important to her" is not a legal argument. A lot of things are important when you are 12, she would have gotten over it.
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4-08-2009 @ 11:38PM
Melissa said...If 1 of my children ever took me to court I would have their bag packed and with me at the courthouse. It would be made clear that she would not be living with her father and I without rules and if the judge thought he could do better, he could take her or she could go be the adult she was trying to be. I love my 4 daughters more than anything else in this world. I do not know what I would do if something happen to them. But, they will be raised properly, they will follow rules or there will be consequences, and if they don't like it they can have what ever rules in their house they see fit. As of right now, I don't have these problems, and it is known in my house that if your behaviour at home and grades at school are not what they should be, then you go no where. If a child can't follow rules at home there's no way they should trusted elsewhere. My kids know that up front. And they love me and we have a great relationship. I mean what I say, I stick to what I say, and no amount of whining gets it changed.
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4-08-2009 @ 11:45PM
tori said...The judge should be dismissed, it's ridiculous to allow a child to sue a parent over a punishment after they disobeyed the rules. Kids are real brats and are getting worse as time goes by, this father tried to be a father not a friend to his kid like most parents do these days. That's why most young people today are spoiled,disrespectful,lazy etc. Parents arent' in charge anymore the kids are and that's a very scary thing!
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4-08-2009 @ 11:39PM
T said...This judge must not have kids or is just plain stupid.
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4-08-2009 @ 11:42PM
Mercedes said...The court was very wrong. This girl will have a million opportunities to take trips and socialize during her lifetime. This was, however, an opportunity for the father to teach the daughter about respect and the court basically said that the daughter doesn't have to respect the father. When you don't follow your parents' rules, thus disrespecting them, there SHOULD be consequences. I hope the father wins the appeal.
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4-08-2009 @ 11:43PM
Tee said...This is pathetic to have gone to a court in the first place and they should really reinstate corporal punishment because he should've given her a serious buttwhoping or ship her butt back to her mother for her to deal with this little brat...he shouldnt even give her a damn thing another day in her life...I have 2 kids and it'll be a cold day in hell before they try something like that over my punishing them,...they will be sent packing out my house in the blink of an eye.
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4-09-2009 @ 11:46PM
Bob K said...I think it was great that the dad let her sue...What a wonderful lesson in civics. But....What the hell was the judge thinking? No, wait, two judges! There has to be more to this story then what we are getting.
BK
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4-08-2009 @ 11:48PM
Andrew said...First time ever posting on one of these, so, here goes...
I didn't see anywhere in the story about how the girl got the lawyer, filed the suit or anything. Makes me wonder if someone might have put her up to it ( read possible vindictive ex ). NOT saying she did but the child had some help from someone. Seems A little too pat to me.
A
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4-11-2009 @ 9:38PM
Emily said...I think blaming the daughter for this situation is probably unfair. I suspect the crux of the problem is that the parents have split up; another article said the mother opposed the punishment, the father was defending it. It seems that this girl is probably being used as a prop between parents who cannot stop fighting even after divorce. It's easy to say the girl should respect her parents, but how is that possible if they're not acting as a unified force in her life? When a child has parents giving conflicting rules and denigrating each other, it's hard to just obey. The legal aid attorney says in the article that the father and mother couldn't agree so she asked the court to step in. I really doubt most 12 year olds would know how to go to legal aid and get an attorney without a parent controlling them.
I don't really know much about the Canadian justice system, but when the parents are the ones who put this in the court's hands by being incapable of resolving their differences. I wonder if the court felt by casting the case out the parents would continue to retaliate through the child? Again, it's easy to say the court should have respected the parents' punishments and rules, but you have parents issuing different rules and punishments; the court's not being asked to overrule one as to choose one. I absolutely agree they probably should have been referred to some sort of mediation program, but the blame here is shared. I don't really have enough information to pass judgment on the court's decision, and while it sounds ridiculous, I personally feel the parents should have agreed to come across as a team no matter how big their conflicts when discipline is at issue. The girl was posting inappropriate pictures of herself and chatting online -- these are serious, dangerous behaviors and she needs both parents trying to help her understand that, not to continue to battle.
I think it speaks volumes that the daughter moved from living with her father to being in her mother's custody. I really suspect that's what mom wanted all along; wear down the relationship until it disintegrated and she became the sole 'respected' parent. I'm sure the girl learned nothing good from this experience but it definitely sounds like she's a product of her parenting.
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4-08-2009 @ 11:47PM
Bob Arthur said...Since he no longer has any authority over her, the father should pack up the girl's belonings, delivered them and her to the judge, and washed his hands of her.
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4-09-2009 @ 12:05AM
tlwblondie said...what are parent's rights?
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4-09-2009 @ 12:05AM
Alecia said...Not only do i think this is not right, But I currently have a 14 year old who lives in my home who said,this judge is out of his mind, and if this girl is living in her parents home then she need to obey thier rules....
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4-09-2009 @ 12:12AM
Frieda said...I am thinking of another case where a father said no and the mom let the kid go on a class trip. That trip went to ARuba and we all know what happened there.........the girl is no where to be found and never will be is my guess.
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4-09-2009 @ 1:17AM
Ilya said...I bet this father regrets ever having this stupid girl.
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4-09-2009 @ 12:17AM
Lakes said...Obviously this child is a spoiled undisipined brat, whoses mother had complete charge over the raiseing of the kid always overruleing the dad. My X husband did that no matter what we said he would over rule my judgement. This kid would only play one parent over the other to get her own way. Problem solved I would of probably long before then shipped that brat back to its mother. Who needs that problem to have to pay for its upbringing to lol forget it pack it off to its mother let her raise the brat. If he found a new girlfriend think she would put up with that kid in the house. No way he would be in for one lonely life for what. A kid that want to sue lol no way sent the brat with her problems bad to the mom.
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4-09-2009 @ 12:15AM
Tami said...I think a parent should punish their child without holding something like that over a kid's head. It pisses me off when my husband will tell my son every week he can longer be a boy scout until he gets him crying, when he gets in trouble for something little. Or he'll tell my teenager he'll take her car away for the smallest infraction. It's ridiculous and we argue about it. A parent should be able to to have a good enough relationship with their child that they don't have to threaten them over getting online. Try communication and respecting them. They will listen to you!
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4-09-2009 @ 12:35PM
YakateeYak said...I felt that I was living the same life as you explained with your hubby. I too would (argue) defend my children. My husband was way to harsh on the littlest infractions. I would try to explain to him that he should try to go about it in a different way. He always came off as unreasonable. I on the other hand, still maintained the rules in the house but with respect. My kids (now adults) resented the fact that they could never talk to their Father because he is/was bull-headed.
Though they both love their Father, they never really had much of a relationship with him. And it is all because of the way he treated them when dealing with the slightest problem that would arise. I would tell him, if you want respect then show them respect, even when it comes to a grounding or punishment.
While I ended up with two mature young adults that love to talk to me about anything & everything. Hubby never did get it and it's sad to me.