Economy Driving Moms to Drink

by Sandy Maple (Subscribe to Sandy Maple's posts) May 20th 2009 11:00AM

Is this your economic survival strategy? Image: sxc.hu

Times are tough all over. For so many of us, incomes have decreased while expenses have not. Where bill-paying used to involve sitting down to write some checks, it can now resemble a workout involving juggling, stretching and rearranging priorities.

Making ends meet can be a tough job, and in many families, it is one that falls squarely on Mom's shoulders. Whether she works outside the home or not, she makes most of the family's purchasing decisions and is often the first to make sacrifices when things get tight.

But in these unusual times, even the toughest mom can find herself overwhelmed by the stress of trying to keep it together for the sake of the family. A recent survey by MomLogic found that 64% of moms say they feel intensely negative emotions these days and half are less satisfied with their lives now than before the economic downturn. And the recession has impacted family planning as well with 27% of moms aged 25 to 34 saying that while they want more children, they are holding off because of the economy.

In families where a partner has lost a job, the news is even worse. 80% admit to feeling overwhelmed and half say they spend more time fighting than having sex.

As bad as all that sounds, it gets worse. The survey found that one in three moms admit to turning to alcohol, food, drugs and/or gambling to help them cope. This is not good. Long after the economy recovers, moms who turn to such vices may find themselves with even bigger problems -- ones that cannot be fixed with a lower interest rate or a pay raise.

Psychologist and mother Jill Spivack has some advice to help prevent a post-recession world of strung out, overweight and addicted moms. Her tips may seem obvious but they also may be just what a stressed-out mom needs to hear.

First and foremost, put down the bottle and the bag of chips. Delete your online gambling account and don't even think about doing drugs. Remind yourself that you are not alone and that there are thousands of moms going through the same thing. Make a list of what is right and good in your life to help balance out what may be less than perfect at this moment.

As long as you are juggling those bills and stretching those dollars, go ahead and make it part of your exercise routine. Physical activity, whether it be exercising, playing sports or doing yoga, has been proven to relieve stress.

And most importantly, don't feel like you have to take it on all by yourself. Ask for help from your partner, your friends, your parents. That's what they are there for. And if you still feel like you are about to go over the edge, don't be afraid to seek help from a professional.

What are your strategies for managing the stress of the current economy? Take our poll, and share with us in the comments.

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Comments (26)

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)

"D" 5-20-2009 @ 6:20PM

We are a retired couple just scared that maybe something will happen to our pensions. The big question - did out company choose wisely when they choose places to buy stocks with the employees money?

StarDust888S 5-20-2009 @ 8:11PM

The poll says, "How are you coping with the bad economy?" Well, welcome to my world. I've been living on a budget all my life. I don't live in squalor or anything, but I know how to cut corners -- mostly sacrificing things I don't need. Everything I have (which, by the way, is very nice and in superb taste), I worked my tail off for, at a normal, respectable job all my life. So, for all those people who have to own $80,000.00 cars, learn to take the bus and walk more. Go on diets. Be happy with a regular TV set, rather than going out and getting an expensive theatre-sized giant screen. Don't spend all your money on booze and cigs. You know, common sense stuff. As I said, welcome to my world.

lbd 5-20-2009 @ 8:29PM

Amen.

gperez1982 5-20-2009 @ 11:18PM

Right on!

Lisa 5-20-2009 @ 8:30PM

Though more people say they are living as they were before they are not saying things are as before. Don't wait for disaster to strike to start cutting back. The economy has not tanked yet.

steve 5-20-2009 @ 9:43PM

Yep you say mom's are drinking but what da f--k about us dad's
Oh I forgot we don't do sh-t That why you see all the dad's killing off the families.

patty 5-20-2009 @ 10:31PM

cheers.

JC 5-20-2009 @ 10:46PM

I'm living no different than I did before. I never live beyond my means. I have 8 credit cards and I do not owe a dime on any of them. If and when I do use them, I pay them off in full when I receive the bills. I pay cash for most things I buy. Even Cars, etc. My credit score is 790, and I have "Life Lock",.. just in case anyone reading this might be tempted to cash in.

awm 5-20-2009 @ 10:54PM

Common sense and the approach of the depression generation to life would serve us al very well.Hopefully,however this turns out everyone will remember the lessons learned. Cut where you can,turn the temp higher on the a/c,turn down the temp on the hotwater heater and take quicker showers,learn to cook inexpensive but good and filling meals,make your driving errands a big loop all in one day or as few trips as possible,grow a garden-your kids will enjoy the process,dont live for things live for people.Get back to the basics and we will all do better.Me I am cheap by nature and tend to live that way.We have 5 kids three grown and raised them all frugally and it didnt do anything but teach them life lessons.Good luck to us all.

N. H. Peters 5-20-2009 @ 11:17PM

A person is ALWAYS worse off after they sober up. Save the money you'd spend on booze and spend it on food for your kids. I say this from the standpoint of a former alcoholic. I've been clean and sober for 12 years now and I can't believe how much better I feel now.

jessica 5-20-2009 @ 11:16PM

Until Obama is kicked out of office you better drink up because the socialist demorats are going to kill the economy even more.

Jim 5-20-2009 @ 11:42PM

I don't think there is any good in worrying about the economy, keep up with whats going on and play it by ear as best you can and you'll survive, It may be tough for a while but like our forefathers did grab your shoe laces and pull yourself up. I believe that there is always a chance to do better for yourself if you know whats going on and take advantage of any situation that presents its-self.
Like grandma said "the's never any great loss without a great gain exposing its self, just be ready and able to recognize it when it comes along".
Don't forget they weathered some regressive economys much worse than this, Try 1909, 1920, and 1932, we've been lucky in the last 65 years. Remember hard work and an honest reputation will do wonders for each one of us.

minski75 5-21-2009 @ 12:14AM

Most americans are in this mess because they feel they have to keep up with the jones'. Give me a break. As StarDust888S said "welcome to my world". I've never owned a new car and my house is not worth a ridiculous amount of money. But I'm happy and ok with not having all the best of everything. As far as the women waiting to have more children because of the recession, how about just cutting back on bs that you don't need. I would much rather have my children than all that material crap. They are well taken care of and happy. Nothing in life is better than that. We just make it work!!!!!!! Here is a newsflash.....stop buying things on credit that you can't afford.....DUH!!!!!!

Kristi-Lynn 5-21-2009 @ 1:03AM

I am having a pretty tough time, and I am trying very hard to get things back to normal. I had a great credit score I worked my whole life to get, and my boyfriend just started working on his (which was my idea) because we were planning on getting a house of our own instead of renting. Well I lost my job with no warning and there has been little to no work for him. So all the bills we had in our names are now over due, and our credits are shot, and I feel I am to blame for his. It is a very hard thing but we are trying to be optimistic, yes somedays we fight because we don't know how it is going to work but we remember that things always get better and the sun will be shinning brighter tomorrow. There is a lot more to my story than just losing my job but I have learned to forgive, but also right now I have to remember myself first. I was trying to help everyone and I was helping them but digging myself deeper. Now that I am down under ground I am reaching up and there is no hand to help me up. So my attitude is if you don't do it yourself no one is going to do it for you. Also on top of all of this someone stole my identity! But things could always be worse! So I PRAY!

Linda Lieber 5-21-2009 @ 5:08AM

Hi Kristi-Lynn, I read your post and it was like reading the story of my own life. To go through such hard times is so scary. My children's father walked out on us a year and a half ago. I am disabled, but am not entitled to SSD since I have not worked in the past 10 years. I worked all my life until my child was born, and I am entitled to nothing. After running out of money, selling my jewelery, my furs, and everything worth anything,I lost my home. My children and I were homeless for six weeks. We slept in our car, until a friend let us live in his basement. While all this may sound horrific, the one thing I loved was waking during the night and seeing my children right next to me. We became closer, and stronger. During this six weeks I spent every single day at the Department of Social Services seeking a "one shot deal". They finally gave me $3000, and believe me it was like hitting lotto. I got us an apartment, our furniture was in storage that had a sale ($1 for the first month), they only charged us the dollar, and we moved into our new apartment. I then sought out their dad, and now he is giving us money every month. I pray very hard every single day. I now know what really matters in life. It took losing everything to learn this lesson and I am glad I did. Please Kristi-Lynn, pray to Jesus as hard as you can with your whole heart. He has a Blessing waiting for you, just like he did for me. You are in my prayers. God Bless everyone who is struggling. Jesus is there to help us. All we have to do is have faith, seek forgiveness, and ask for his help.

dm28fla 5-21-2009 @ 1:47AM

What a joke. The moms are stressed out due to the economy? Why? Less shopping sprees? Less gifts of jewelry? The fear that they might eventually have to get off the couch, put down the tub of ice cream, turn off Oprah and go out and make some money for the family?

Seriously ladies, if you think you have it hard, how do you think the guys are feeling right now? The least you can do is thank your man for all he's done for you and try to be supportive.

katydid7 5-21-2009 @ 1:58AM

uh, some of us are working as well - it's the cutbacks and lack of raises that are hurting combined with the fact that the cost of living hasn't changed - I haven't seen grocery prices go down, have you? And BTW, I don't watch Oprah, or any television for that matter, so don't generalize!

catrainone 5-21-2009 @ 1:40AM

We live in a very wealthy town, but we don't really belong here, we just "landed" here 8 years ago, before we knew any better. And we can't keep up with the Joneses, so we don't even try. But it does get old, constantly explaining to our kids why we don't have a flat screen TV, a 10 bedroom house, a summer home and a Land Rover . . . like their friends do! Why don't we move? House is now worth less than our mortgage, the school system is great and the kids are settled and happy - so this is MY sacrifice, just living here until we can afford to get OUT!

Cyndi 5-21-2009 @ 4:42AM

Driving drunk or doing drugs? what do you get out of that? I mean if your a mother and your kids are with you and they are watching you drink and then maybe drive what kind of lesson is that teaching our kids, first they know that its against the law to drink and drive they are told that in school and then go home and see their parents doing it. Gheeeez come on now what is this world coming to? well i guess i can answer that for myself its coming to an end.

Heather 5-21-2009 @ 7:14AM

Employers are causing people to drink. We just had our hours cut. We are schedualed for 20 hrs a week . We had been getting 35 for over a year. We were very greatful. They cut it back to 20. With the comments "we shouldn't get so dependant on the # of hours we work" Excuse me! People rely on thier pay checks. Of course we got a little upset, Our pay was just cut by 1/3. If we cut thier pay by 1/3 I am shure they would be a little upset. But alas they are full time and are still getting OT! I want to know how they can justify cutting hours for the lowest paid employee's but give the highest paid ones OT.
Then we get the snide comments ( joking of course) that we don't do anything anyways. "We should be greatful we are getting 20 hrs a week, most people in our jobs at other locations get less". Thanks we like you too.

Sometimes I think we are reverting back to Oliver Twist.

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